To tell him to leave me alone? 10yo

[Mamato3boysand2dogs]

My youngest son is driving me insane and I don't know if it's me, or him ... or what other mums are doing!

Basically bored 24/7 unless actively entertained. We have to be "doing" something all the time or he just roams around, bored, which distracts me and means i cant get on / or relax. He has all the gadgets. His own room, full of "stuff". I take him out a lot. Yesterday seaside, Saturday alton towers. In between the days out , i always try and invite one of his mates to play, or take them out, to keep him busy. We bake sometimes, he has plenty to watch on TV and a big garden to play in, should he choose.

Yet it feels like he is slowly squeezing my head in a vice. When nothing is going on and im wfh or just pottering, he mopes around with a look on his face. Bored.

Ive just told him to leave me alone and now i feel guilty .

Mums of 10/11 year old boys... is this normal????

i used to just reel off all the things they had to occupy themselves with, and told them to go pick something.

I would never tolerate them hovering around pestering me because they were bored, or pulling faces/sitting in my view sulking.. they were told to either go find something to do, or go be bored somewhere else, like in their room.

They're both teenagers now, and they do occasionally still complain they're bored, and thats when i'll go walk the dog, or take them for a walk and play pokemon go..etc.

I appreciate boredom, i have ADHD and i have days where nothing 'sparks joy' and i just have to find something to do, even if i'm flitting every 5 minutes between stuff until i find something to entertain myself.

i'll admit a couple of times i've gone and lolled on their bed, or sat next to them and annoyed the crap out of them because 'i'm bored' until they tell me to go away, and its partly so i have a reference to remind them how bloody annoying it is having someone else disturbing you because they're 'bored'

When you spend your days being your kids entertainment, they don't learn how to cope with being bored.

It’s not too late op.might take a bit of time and a few huff and puffing and him feeling uncomfortable and even upset.boredom when you don’t no what else to do must actually feel horrid.
at this age ours were role playing offices in their room.
baking
olanning and cooking todays meals
watching hours of tv.yes mn there were endless days of nothing but lying on the sofa doing nothing but watch tv
reading
garden kicking ball about
planting veggies
writing
drawing crafting
swingball in garden
1 player card games
its difficult because he simply doesn’t no how to do that,his imagination hasn’t been turned on! Those pathways don’t run that way in his brain.
so what advice to give…
try it out.see how it goes.
a few hours where he is just watching the tv is surely good for you.

@Quartz2208 that was my first thought too. I know it's frowned on to mention other threads, but I do wonder whether this child's clinginess is due to something other than boredom.

I hope things are O.K. @Mamato3boysand2dogs

All the ‘stuff’ is the problem. He has all the toys and gadgets and now he doesn’t have the capacity to entertain himself. It’s something that is learned. Imagination is a very important skill which is only developed when kids have to find something to do. Maybe set him a challenge. Building something with a prize for example.

Another one for pick a chore any chore and they soon run off!

Whenever my nearly-6 year old starts up with the I'm boreds, she normally gets a mild "oh dear, that sucks" kind of response.

That's particularly true on days like we had today when she started whining 5 mins after coming back from swimming lessons followed by a picnic at the splash park... 🙄 She soon found something to do when I sympathised but didn't leap to action!

But it's perfectly pleasant to brand parents abusive when it's totally unwarranted. Nah pull the other one. If you can't take it don't dish it out