Mother in law trouble

[Icequeen122]

Hi I was just wanting others opinions on this to see if anyone thinks I’m wrong I don’t think I am so here goes..
my son has autism and only 8 years old one of the things he can struggle with is behaviour I am doing everything I can to help him with his, he had a bad day and wasn’t listening to anything and was just doing a lot of misbehaving.
she isn’t his biological grandmother either so I felt how she handled him was completely wrong and I wouldn’t of even let my own mother do what she did.
she thought it would be okay to shout at him repeatedly and called him stupid and a fucking idiot and told him that his younger brothers were more intelligent than him. I then started to tell her I think she needs to stop and she then started to shout at me and call me a fucking idiot and said that if he was her son she would lock him down a hall way for a week with nothing to do. so I told my partner that me and the children were leaving she then kept shouting at me so I said oh that’s clever isn’t it keep shouting infront of the children that’s going to upset them. She then said to my partner oh so cos she says so you all need to leave do you! I kept saying we’re leaving and that was that. She then shouted at my partner telling him to never bring that thing here again meaning me and I said don’t worry I won’t be coming back again I don’t want too and told her sue wasn’t welcome at my home either. My partner has said it was all my fault and I shouldn’t of said anything to her. I was defending my child I had every right to pull her didn’t I?

What was your son actually doing?

Having issues and challenges with your mental health doesn't make you an unfit parent.

Standing by while your mother verbally abuses your partner, when she takes issue with your mother verbally abusing a vulnerable child does, however, make you an unfit parent.

They're a right pair of revolting bloody specimens.

Wow, well done on getting rid of the gruesome twosome. Vile pair.

Oh the poor boy. I'm so sorry. It must hurt him so much that after all those things that she said, his dad didn't defend or comfort him.

It's a shame it's the school holidays. It would be good if he could talk to a counsellor or something.

I can't believe you had kids with this man.

I think your mental health will improve considerably once you have less contact with this pair.

Oh for goodness sake. What's that supposed to achieve? How does it help?

Well surely this wasn't the first time ops mil had acted out....

Honestly today he wasn’t doing anything at all. He was sat eating a sandwich: which made me even more angrier with her I wasn’t even rude to her tho that’s the stupid thing I was shaking with anger and I still remained more than calm I raised my voice once to her after she was getting more and more aggressive

This too

I bet its because your son isn't biologically related to her then.
Either way you've gotten rid of a lot of trash.

If anyone, anyone at all spoke in front of my child like this about someone else, never mind directly about them, that would be the first and last time it happened. The fact that your partner backed his mother up about her behaviour speaks volumes, and you are well shot of the pair of them. Well done for putting your kids first. Don't be perusaded back, for any reason, because you'll set the bar for future behaviour, and it will only get worse.

Good on you for sticking up for your DC. Neither her nor her son are any loss to you.

@Icequeen122 you definitely need to make it clear to a solicitor that your dp supports his dm being abusive to the dc.
Unfortunately it’s very common for even bio gp’s to react badly to nd dgc.
A woman at a club I attend proudly told me how horrible her autistic dgs was and that she slapped his legs when he had a meltdown. I’ve not spoken to the woman since.

@Cognacsoft wow nasty person I can’t believe how cruel people are.
her bio grandson she dotes on him he’s her everything. I feel it’s just a thing against mine

Honestly don’t want to unblock her right now I don’t think I could trust myself with how angry I feel right now. I know you’re all right but I just can’t yet

OP, how did your other children react? Are they upset for their brother?

Also, try to get both of them to admit what happened today via messaging. I think you might need that proof in future...

@StepAwayFromGoogling they’re so little the eldest out of the other 3 is only 3 and the other 2 others are 2 and 9 months. They went quiet until we left and got home but they’re okay. I’ve tried to get my now ex to admit it but he just keeps babbling on that she didn’t do anything wrong and I was disrespectful. Can only get him to admit it verbally

Sorry about the way your MIL treated you xx 🌺you were right to stand up for your son. Yes try to get as many proofs as you can.

Wow if anyone spoke to my child like that I would have erupted. Well done for removing your children from that situation.

by the sound of things she is used to being in control and getting things her own way with no one standing up to her.

keep every piece of message that you receive from them and stay strong.

Record the waste of oxygen

I’m sorry but if anyone had said that to my autistic child I would not have been responsible for my action.

she’s a nasty human being and I wouldn’t let her near my kids again, god knows what she would do if you weren’t there? Definitely get a solicitor. Hopefully you and your son are alright OP

OP you need to unblock her and get proof of this before she calms down. You need as much proof in your corner that both of them are unsuitable and will put your children in danger as you can get.

This makes me so sad but also (and bear with me here!!) this is kind of heartwarming at the same time.
it’s awful the way your MIL (ex-MIL I suppose) spoke to your poor son. No child deserves to be spoken to that way, ever, by anyone. My own grandmother was vile and prone to abusive outbursts and I still remember them now.
however, what I also remember is that no one stood up for me, but you did for you son, and he’ll be stronger for knowing you’ll always put him first and be in his corner. You should be proud of yourself for having his back, and for being so strong as to call it a day with your partner who, frankly, sounds awful too.

Youre a better person than me op, I’d have twatted her between the eyes and burned her house down with her in it.

Or at least those thoughts would have been going through my mind. I’d move as far away from the pair of them as I possibly could and not leave a forwarding address.

Wow what a c**t you've got much more patience than me, I would have gone mental