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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Not to put cat down?

113 replies

babybooo · 24/07/2022 13:38

My cat is 16 and up until this last month has been in perfect health, only saw the vet for a UTI this year that's all. She has a grade 2 heart murmur which is medicated.

Over the last month she's become more frail and slowed right down. To be expected with her age I suppose. She can still walk around, go up and down stairs, jump on the bed etc. I would say she's just slow at going from sitting to lying down.

Last week she became super lethargic and went off her food. Took her to emergency vet who ran full blood screen which came back fine, very good in fact! They gave her fluids and said to monitor her. She went to the normal vet the next day who said she had muscle wastage in her hind legs to be expected with age. Gave her appetite increasing meds.

Over the last week cat has barely ate. she will take a mouthful of warmed cat food or tuna but that's about it. No interest in food.

Took her to vet yesterday who gave a steroid injection to hopefully get her eating again. She also gave fluids. She said there is nothing "wrong" with the cat but she is probably nearing the end of her life. She isn't in any pain or distress.

She has eaten tiny bits since the injection yesterday. She has also started drinking which is good. She was very dehydrated yesterday.

I am due to fly to America on Tuesday for 2 weeks but I have decided not to go because I am scared cat will die while I'm there.

She isn't in any pain or distress, other than not eating I would say she's her normal self, maybe a bit more sleepy than usual.

AIBU to give her a chance? Or should I have her put to sleep?

Vet has us booked in for 9 Aug which was meant to be after my holiday. She said if the cat starts to eat that would keep her going.

She has lost a significant amount of weight over the last couple of months - she's losing weight even between vet visits and is very very skinny.

This cat has been by my side for 16 years and in need to be by hers and do right by her.

OP posts:
madasawethen · 26/07/2022 16:43

OP I'm so very very sorry. RIP your dear kitty. Flowers Flowers

I had to do it twice this year. Brothers who were 17. One had mouth cancer and the other completely blind and cancer also suspected because of the decline.
It's never easy but it is the ultimate gift of love and kindness.

Fenella123 · 26/07/2022 17:09

OP, she was old, she had previously been healthy and had gone downhill quickly, she wasn't eating. I read all this and thought,
this cat is probably dying. If bloods are done, most likely the liver will be completely shot. And tbh if the liver is buggered, that's it. The animal has a few days of feeling nauseous and tired and then they die.

Then you posted the follow-up and indeed, liver...

Unlike a lot of PPs I am pretty gung-ho about getting tests and treatment from the vets BUT after decades of this.... well, yes you could have taken your cat home, but that would just have bought them a few more days of sitting around feeling crap all the time, and then they would have died anyway.
Ask me how I know this!

IME vets don't rush to suggest PTS and they like you to have a full picture. It has to be your decision. I rather think that if you'd asked them if they'd treated any cat of a similar age and condition to yours and restored them to health, they'd have said, No.

Thehawki · 26/07/2022 17:17

I don’t think she would have had more than a couple of days, maybe weeks at most OP. You did the right thing. In her whole life she had only a few days of feeling a bit ill because you were there for her and made the right decision at the right time. She didn’t have to have a feeding tube that she didn’t understand, she didn’t need to go to lots more tests while she felt ill she just had love and cuddles until the end. Sending you all of my love, so sorry for your loss.

sunsetsandsandybeaches · 26/07/2022 17:22

Oh OP, I know it's hard but you've 100% made the right decision - please don't tell yourself otherwise.

Big hugs for you x

BMW6 · 26/07/2022 17:33

Stop torturing yourself OP, you had to make a difficult decision and you chose the one that ensured your pet never suffered.

And the vet agreed your choice was best for your pet. No-one can know absolutely what would have happened if you'd continued examinations and treatments, but you do know 100% that you have saved her from suffering.

Thatsenoughnow · 26/07/2022 17:43

At the age of 16, she wasnt really going to get any better. That's a great long life for a cat. If you're in doubt about your decision, read the treatment plan again that the vet proposed - that would be brutal for a 10 year old cat, let alone a very elderly one. Imagine if you'd put her through all that trauma and you'd have ended up losing her anyway - because she was 16 and that's old for a cat. I am sorry for your loss, but you've done the right thing and given your girl a dignified and pain free end. If you've ever seen an animal kept alive for the sake of the owners, you'd realise just what a wonderful thing you've done for her.

shockthemonkey · 26/07/2022 17:46

Dear boo, you did the right thing by your cat.

Better a week too early than an hour too late.

I don't think you were too early by the way.

gogogadgetgo · 26/07/2022 17:51

Please stop torturing yourself

Your baby cat was well loved. Everyone here can see that.

You did the right thing. It sounds like she was ready to go. And I'm sorry to say sometimes we're not ready to let them go.

But you did it for her so she wouldn't suffer. Go easy on yourself. I'm so sorry for your loss. Flowers

RedHelenB · 28/07/2022 13:39

She doesn't sound to have much quality of life if she's not eating. I'd put her to sleep. I was there, stroking my 22 year old cat when her time came, it was very oeaceful.

babybooo · 28/07/2022 14:02

Thank you so much everyone, your replies have really comforted me. I miss my sweet girl so much.

Right before he injected her she flinched and tried to get away from him (I was holding her), but she didn't react earlier in the day when he took her bloods... so I'm thinking was she trying to say she didn't want to be put down? Was she scared? I was holding her and telling her I loved her.

I also wonder if she saw how upset I was and wanted to stay with me (she was always like that, if I was poorly she laid on me til I felt better)

OP posts:
nokitchen · 28/07/2022 14:11

She wasn't trying to tell you she didn't want to be put down. It was the right time. You did the right thing. If you hadn't done it she would have had more days of suffering. She's at peace now.

EsmeGythaMagrat · 28/07/2022 14:16

OP listen to me, you did exactly the right thing for her. You made the difficult decision, when it needed to be made to ensure she didn’t suffer.
Please try and remember that you have her the best life where she didn’t know hunger, fear or pain. You did right by her I promise.

Wolfiefan · 28/07/2022 14:19

You absolutely and completely did the right thing. My 19 year old did similar. There was no single issue that we could remedy. She had just lived as long as she comfortably could. And any attempts by me or the vet to keep her going would have resulted in suffering.
I am so very very sorry for your loss. But you did the last thing you can do for your beloved pet. A calm, pain free and dignified ending.

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