One thing they get wrong in films or TV dramas about your job

[KarlWrenbury]

In schools. That boyfriends (invariably ) could just turn up in classes
See. Bruce almighty. Yesterday. Cheaters.

That fist fights in action films go on forever, whereas in real life any one of those blows would render most people insensate.

Yes this, and in a kebab shop/launderette/cinema/train station - with no time to possibly get to the hospital or birth centre of course 🙄

that law is exciting. Most of the time it really isn't.

Archaeologists never work in the rain, never get covered in mud, and never find absolutely bog all.

What’s your job?!

Police officers don't drive everywhere with blues & twos & certainly never when they've just arrested someone

Journalists - that they earn enough money from writing one feature a month to have a plush city centre apartment to themselves, that they sleep with sources (usually only female journalists doing this), that there’s unlimited budget to send them gallivanting round the world for a story and the deadline is as long as they want it to be. In reality most journalists these days are at their desk rewriting copy from news wires or churning out nonsense for the internet for shit salaries (hence why I stopped being one!)

Nothing to do with fighting - I misread the thread title as if it were things got wrong in films. Doh!

Not a job but it annoys me when they put to wrong neighing sound with horses on programmes. You get a big, high, whinnying neighing noise put with a horse who is standing very peacefully. Or a soft "hello, is that my food?" snuffle put with a horse who has just galloped across a field.

Nobody especially the Barnabys or assistants know how to address clergy.
Do not call them Reverend.

The mock-ups of newspapers in tv dramas are woeful. They never get the typography right.

It would be quicker to say what’s accurate about the depiction of criminal barristers, but one or two that spring to mind is that all that’s involved in advising a client is to say ‘look, I know this judge, so what they will do is x,y,z’, that you are allowed to provide your client with a defence, that court is always a stone’s throw from chambers/office, that we don’t know the meaning of nervous, to the point of callous arrogance.

That chickens make laying egg sounds when they're not laying eggs. And that they're always pecking round yards when there are people/vehicles/pets etc (they'd run away). It's so obvious that they've just scattered some grain to get the chickens in shot.

X-rays are often hung upside down or back to front.

Come to think of it, we don’t even hang X-rays anymore, everything is digital 😂😂

That the bell will ring when you are halfway through a lesson. Teachers know when the bell is going to ring, it doesn't just randomly ring when they are mid sentence. You finish the lesson in time for the bell. In films this happens all the time and the kids just get up and walk out and the teacher says "ok we will carry on with this tomorrow" or whatever.

What do you call them? Vicar? Priest? Rev? Or just use their first name?

I don't kill people.

www.imdb.com/title/tt2140479/

DD's a violinist. Loves 'Sherlock' but loses her shit every time Cumbersnatch gets the violin out....

Aw, and he worked so hard on that, too! He said himself it must look awful, but he had some training from a proper violinist.

(I might be betraying my too forensic interest in Sherlock here)

I'm an accountant so no one tries to do my job even badly on TV..

Not true - when Bobby and JR split Ewing Oil in two, to see how which one could run it better; the auditors did the audit in a day (or was it two)! Miraculous!

“The Life and Loves of a She Devil” - the husband was an accountant. His wife was able to defraud him, as she said he never looked at his bank statements! Who has any faith in banks not to make mistakes?

Lab results that come back fast. I can let the simpler tests slide, for the sake of artistic licence, but when it’s things that can take weeks (such as an unknown viral infection) if not months, I get the rage.

Or when they claim it’s X antibiotic for X bacteria based on the lab results when it’s something we can’t culture (wish we could, though).

That Psychologists and Psychological Therapists disregard confidentiality 😬

That making cake for a living is fun, quirky, cute, and creative.. no.. its hot sticky, messy, frustrating and hard. and nobody wants to pay you properly for it cos they think you should do it for the love of it cos, surely... it's fun, yes??

My job is too lowly to be ever shown on tv, but closest Is a supply teacher, who will come in and charm the kids with their sparky, iconoclastic teaching style and win over the troubled teens to allow them to go on and become poets or writers or actors. In reality-thrown in with minimal resources or prep and if lucky, get out alive.