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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be fed up of nursery sending my kid home filthy?

53 replies

Wouldloveanother · 21/07/2022 17:50

and I don’t just mean a bit of paint on the clothes, mud on shoes etc. I mean dirty nappies at least one a week that have clearly been sat in for a while (poo molded around the bum cheeks). Food crusted all round her mouth. Hair in her face with her hair clip dangling off the end. Filthy hands, skinned knees with no plaster.

would I be OTT to complain?

OP posts:

MissBPotter · 21/07/2022 17:53

That sounds bad. I thought you might be annoyed about a bit of mud or paint which I think is perfectly
reasonable for nursery kids and even good for them. But dirty nappies and food crusting is disgusting and I would think about moving her, are they really likely to change?

luxxlisbon · 21/07/2022 17:56

Sending them out with a dirty nappy anything other than a once off as an overnight is unacceptable imo.
I mean my child comes out of nursery stinking, she usually has food on her clothes, paint, marker, sand in her ear etc. I just put that down to her having a good day.
She is always in a fresh nappy, with her shoes back on and her hair freshly done.

Penguinfeather781 · 21/07/2022 17:56

You would be unreasonable not to - that’s basically neglect (I was assuming you meant paint on clothes etc which I think is normal).

user850301848172 · 21/07/2022 17:56

I wouldn't even complain, I would just move her

PuttingDownRoots · 21/07/2022 17:57

Nappies and face... definitely. (The nappies sound negletful)
Messy hair... my child would pul her hair out of clips minutes after it was done
Cuts not cleaned... worrying
Filthy hands... depends (so if she was in the sandpit when you arrive of course she will be grubby. If she's eating a snack... )

Original poster

Wouldloveanother · 21/07/2022 17:57

Oh and she’s always barefoot when she comes out they don’t put shoes on her

OP posts:

snowbellsxox · 21/07/2022 17:58

Disgraceful

Thursday37 · 21/07/2022 17:59

That’s neglect. I’d complain, move and log it with Ofsted as a concern.

My DD has filthy clothes from play and comes home a bit grubby round the edges but clean bum, face, nose.

Original poster

Wouldloveanother · 21/07/2022 17:59

I mean obviously I can’t post a photo of the nappy! And I’ve now cleaned her mouth, but here are the clothes and knee (which I know are more minor, but just to give an idea of the level of dirty)

OP posts:

DogsAndGin · 21/07/2022 18:00

Absolutely complain! That’s horrendous, and sounds like neglect

Original poster

Wouldloveanother · 21/07/2022 18:02

I mean the blue is clearly paint but what the hell is the brown stuff?! It looks burnt (although I’m sure it’s not, I’m just baffled!)

OP posts:

Redlorryyellowlorryblue · 21/07/2022 18:03

That is filthy. I would definitely say something (verbal and follow up email) about the nappy and cuts. If it keeps happening I would move her.

luxxlisbon · 21/07/2022 18:03

From the pictures I couldn’t get worked up about the clothes. You have to send kids to nursery in clothes that don’t show stains as much and aren’t expensive or loved to begin with. That’s just part of it. They need to be free to I play and obviously a nursery worker isn’t as concerned about the clothes of 3 children as you would be just to your own.
And again scrapes and falls happen, as long as it doesn’t seem neglectful and you are happy with the incident form I wouldn’t get worked up about a one off accident.

The nappy isn’t acceptable at all though.

Original poster

Wouldloveanother · 21/07/2022 18:05

im not really worried about the clothes, although it looks like they didn’t even have overalls on to paint. I can live with that though! But put that together with the dirty nappy, food crusted face, hair in her eyes and a cut knee, and I just felt really annoyed when they brought her out today. She looked a state.

OP posts:

bloodywhitecat · 21/07/2022 18:07

I wouldn't put a dressing on that knee, the clothes are par for the course with kids doing crafts etc and I haven't yet found a way to keep clips in my baby's hair that she can't undo in two seconds flat. There is no excuse for the dirty nappy and it is a simple job for them to check hands and faces before the child leaves the table.

SamMil · 21/07/2022 18:10

The clothes and hair wouldn't bother me.
The knee wouldn't bother me (although my nursery wouldn't mention it and hand me an accident form).

The food on the face would bother me - they should be wiping or helping them wipe after eating.
The dirty nappy would bother me the most if it is a regular occurrence, especially if it has clearly been like that a while. That is basic care.

Original poster

Wouldloveanother · 21/07/2022 18:10

She never takes the clip out herself, it just loosens over the course of the day and they can’t be arsed to take a second to put it back in (they would only need to do this once or maximum twice throughout the day). She has a sensible haircut but very thick hair which is prone to escaping!

OP posts:

SamMil · 21/07/2022 18:10

*would mention it

Sockwomble · 21/07/2022 18:11

Stained clothes are inevitable and the knee doesn't need a dressing. Repeated incidences of dirty nappy and food not cleaned from face should be complained about.

Tumbleweed101 · 21/07/2022 18:13

Clothes look like paint and pen.
Nappies I'd be worried about unless it looked fresh - I've changed children just before they are due to to home and they poo between that and being collected.
Food should be cleaned off hands and face unless you're collecting directly at a meal time where they may not have had a chance yet.
Cuts and scrapes - plasters aren't put on as routine but the wound should be clean and have an accident report with it.
No shoes - bare feet is recommended for foot development and your nursery may have a policy especially at the moment in the nice weather.
Messy hair - that is normal. Many younger children dislike clips and hair bands. A long day at nursery may leave them a bit straggly. We often try to neaten them up before going home and they are pulled out immediately again.

If you have any concerns always contact the nursery manager who can investigate for you.

georgarina · 21/07/2022 18:18

That's shocking. I also think if they're doing activities that will stain clothes they should put aprons on the kids. This nursery needs reporting. Do other parents feel the same?

TeapotTitties · 21/07/2022 18:20

The dirty nappy (if it's encrusted) and the graze is pretty neglectful.

Grazes should be covered to stop infection, especially with children as they're too young to know they should try to keep them clean.

Soggycrisps · 21/07/2022 18:24

I would say something every single time it happens. I wouldn't do an official complaint until I had brought it up a few times already. But if this has been happening a while now I'd be looking for a new place.

Once when mine was in for half a day I noticed he had the same nappy on that I dropped him off in. I just emailed as soon as I noticed and they looked into it and rang me up to apologize and also said sorry in person when I next went in and it hasn't happened since.

Randomthoughts992 · 21/07/2022 18:27

If you sent your DD in like that they would be calling social services. None of my kids have come home from nursery looking like that, i have 2 toddlers andd both come back with clean clothes( the nursery tends to put on spares if clothes get wet etc) and clean nappies.

Smartiepants79 · 21/07/2022 18:28

I would complain about the nappy and the lack of clean hands etc.
That graze doesn’t need covering though and dirty clothes are just par for the course.

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