Things you consider bad manners that others don’t

[Novasmum]

Inspired by an experience earlier today of having to listen to a man whistle for 10 minutes in GP waiting room.

Not only is it annoying but I do think it’s bad manners but I know other people wouldn’t class whistling as bad manners.

what’s yours?

People who stand in a shopping aisle looking at goods for as long as it takes them, standing as comfortably as they are able, as if they are the most important person in the world, and if they act important, everyone else will treat them as though they are. Never mind that it is impossible to walk around them.

People who in a queue, at the bank or post office, take an absolute age talking about a type of transaction which the cashier says can't be done; remonstrating about the cost of postage. Again, they are the only people in the world and nobody else matters, and if you act entitled, everyone else will regard you as such, and treat you like a titled person, or someone a bit special.

The irritating, but I suppose, well-motivated habit of saying: "No, you're all right", after someone has said "Thank you". It obviously is no longer the norm or considered polite to say 'thank you' perfunctorily.

If you wear headphones on public transport you should check whether they are leaking that tinny sound where you can't hear any song just a perpetual tap tap tap from their ears. Grating and irritating and just inconsiderate of others.

With you on that purplebells My in laws do that thing of not waiting for everyone to have their food before starting to eat, and I find it really awkward, but different families do stuff differently. I would never let my kids have bad table manners though.
My pet hate is people who put their feet up on seats, particularly public seats, and even worse- let their dogs sit on seats that are for people. So inconsiderate.

@Novasmum I have always thought whistling was bad manners too. I remember as a child, my grandpa telling me gentlemen don’t whistle. I have no idea why.

I think it’s bad manners to start eating at the table before everyone has been served.

Not enforcing manners in one's children eg allowing your kids to behave badly at the dinner table, kids not saying please or thank you or excuse me and parents not picking up on this,

I'm not keen on bus drivers start up suddenly before passengers are seated and flinging them against a railing as they jolt and jerk.

On buses, mothers with massive prams which don't fit running over your toes and then going a few hundred yards, which, when I was a child, my mum and most of her friends would have walked.

Door to door salespeople (including charities)

Being consistently
Late

Controversial, probably, but: Smoking. Anywhere at all where it could impact others (even if that's e.g. in your own garden, if it's of a size that the smoke will go through neighbours' open windows/onto their patios/laundry).

Ringing your bell as a cyclist on the pavement and expecting pedestrians to jump out of the way. And not saying thank you.

Not indicating when driving. Infuriating as a pedestrian trying to cross the road and having to guess which way a driver is going to turn because they CBA to indicate.

Also controversial: Excluding children from weddings. Getting married abroad (without a family connection to the country in question) and expecting people to spend vast amounts of money/time/annual leave on attending. Money requests - but in all honesty I find gift lists quite bad-mannered too.

Not keeping dogs on a short lead when walking past others.

Not offering to remove your shoes when entering someone's house. (I do agree that there are some circumstances in which it can be rude to ask someone to take their shoes off. But it's usually rude not to offer. Fortunaely I live in a culturally shoes-off place).

sniffing
eating with your mouth open
talking with your mouth full
chewing gum at any age but worse when you ar out of your teens or post 40
loud music out of your head phones
"like"
wearing your coat hanging off your shoulders- yes Mum you were so right!

Children who are at my house for a play date or with their parents helping themselves to my food without asking, or going through cupboards and drawers looking for food. Parents who sit there and let it happen without a word.

When you've cooked a hot meal for guests and ask them to please start so you they can taste it how you meant to be eaten, even though you're a couple of minutes away from sitting down. But someone refuses to so everyone else resists too (looking at you MIL 🙄). They insist they're doing the polite thing but it feels really passive aggressive, like "no, it's YOUR fault we all have to eat this cold because you weren't organized enough to sit down with us".

I've even tried sitting down so we can all start together before getting back up to do drinks/put the next thing in the oven/whatever but it makes no difference. These people will sit wooden staring at their plate until you tuck in properly and it gives me the absolute rage and doesn't feel like good manners if the host is begging you to eat.

I thought holding phones to your mouth horizontal was a thing from The Apprentice, didn't realise people did it in RL!

Spending ages looking at your phone whilst out with a friend.

Impatience in a queue when they stand as close as possible in order to almost psychogicall push you along. Ive had people touching shoulders with me in orde to lean across me to put their stuff on the belt or counter whilst mine is still being processed/bagged.
Just back off and wait your fecking turn. Incredibly rude.
Oh and no l am not a faffer. Have payment and bags ready and don't chat excessively to the cashier beyond the necessary.

I was told off by a waiter in a Japanese restaurant for not sending the food back, as it was poorly cooked. It's an amazing small family restaurant that I love, and didn't want to cause a fuss. But they would much rather that I had complained so they could rectify it.

I think you are on your own with this one.

Eating while on the phone makes my eyelid twitch with rage.

Loud, open mouthed eating, sniffing, cutlery placed incorrectly after a meal and watching videos stupidly loud when you're with someone.

I used to occasionally see people on the tube cutting their nails. Once a man was cutting his toe nails and a nail pinged off into someones book, who happened to be quietly reading next to him.

This.

Never heard of "a cutlery" but heard it pronounced Cutelry often.

Sorry l do chat to cashier/shopkeeper when there's no queue, , l meant l dont when there's anyone behind me

Oh I am so with you on this, especially the passive aggression, and the refusal to even start serving themselves … and have the cheek to pat themselves on the back about it.

my addition is back seat driving- it should be a capital offence.

So I always thought that ‘RSVP’ on an invitation meant you should let the host know whether or not you can attend.

Apparently lots of people think it means you respond to let the host know you can come, but there’s no need to respond to the invitation if you won’t be attending.

Which I think is staggeringly rude.

Oh 🤮
It reminds me of something I saw on a railway platform once, although the guy that did it was completely oblivious.
He came striding over to look at the arrivals board, somehow managing to kick a (dog?) turd onto the top of sports bag belonging to a guy sitting on the bench underneath.
The poor sod's face when he went to pick up his bag!

People who say “excuse me” without saying please and thank you.