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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Does your DC primary school allow squash through a hot day?

381 replies

Neowwwm · 11/07/2022 09:03

Sent my DC with a non- see through bottle with juice in today as since weaning and trying - DC has never drank plain water. Teacher removed the bottle stating water only in the day which will be provided with their own water bottles from school and juice only at lunch time.

AIBU or should this rule be relaxed during heatwaves?

OP posts:
TheGreatBobinsky · 12/07/2022 21:15

Florenz · 12/07/2022 20:42

No child would refuse to drink water if they are thirsty enough. The need to drink water is hard-wired into human DNA. Parents who insist that their child simply cannot drink plain water are being ridiculous. It's like saying that their child can only eat ice cream.

So how do you think children end up hospotalized through dehydration? There are numerous people on this thread who have experienced this.

parenthood1989 · 12/07/2022 21:23

Florenz · 12/07/2022 20:42

No child would refuse to drink water if they are thirsty enough. The need to drink water is hard-wired into human DNA. Parents who insist that their child simply cannot drink plain water are being ridiculous. It's like saying that their child can only eat ice cream.

Oh away and RTFT for goodness sake. This shit is exhausting.

Barbie222 · 12/07/2022 21:29

I'd advise speaking with the SENCO as refusing to drink water can be a red flag and you can get an exemption made and get on a pathway to support if need be.

I don't think the no squash rule should be changed for neurotypical children in hot weather, no. I think more children drink water and eat fruit than was the case 15 years ago or so and part of that's due to a really long battle over that time to get parents to see a water bottle and healthy snack as part of school uniform.

GoodThinkingMax · 12/07/2022 21:31

YABU. Water is best - squash is sugar and chemicals. Not a healthy drink and an insidious way of making children obese - the “hidden”calories. It’s also pretty tooth-rotting.

Flamingle18 · 12/07/2022 21:51

my son puts fresh mint and cucumber or a slice of lemon in his water and school
are fine with that

Flamingle18 · 12/07/2022 21:52

sugar free flavoured clear water if it’s the only way to make sure he’s drinking more

Aslan007 · 12/07/2022 21:56

I can’t help wondering how your child got into the habit of only drinking juice?!?
My 3 year old still doesn’t know any better to this very day coz we as a family have only ever had water on the table and offered him water. It’s either that or nothing. The only juice he’s ever had is freshly sqeezed orange and even that’s once in a very blue moon. The last thing anyone needs is a toddler on a sugar high

Mrseds · 12/07/2022 22:05

Our school is the same and I’ve been called up on it before but now I don’t use a see through bottles or I put flavoured water in

chemlu · 12/07/2022 22:26

Somethings Snappy well said!

MdNdD · 12/07/2022 23:39

One of my children will not drink water at all. He absolutely hates it - it makes him gag and shudder. To the point he will literally go days and days without drinking if that’s all that’s on offer. He did this on school camp recently, three full days, in the heat doing sport all day with nothing at all to drink. Nothing except the milk on his cereal in the mornings if you can count that. He was in such a state when he came home.

So the theory that they’ll drink when thirsty enough doesn’t always work!! He’d have ended up in hospital on a drip before drinking any water.

I put cordial in his metal drink bottle for school to avoid the inevitable - headaches, bedwetting, constipation, lack of concentration, bad behaviour, tiredness. I understand it is unhealthy, but that is the only junk I allow - no sweets etc. And the alternative isn’t great. I agreed this with his first school, offered to provide a letter from the urinary clinic and promised to send the cordial in a bottle that wasn’t see through and made him promise not to tell the other kids.

It’s a nightmare, creates so many issues.

My other two drink water, one only drinks water, won’t touch cordial or juice.

What I find crazy in all of this, is the schools don’t allow cordial, because it’s not healthy yet my younger kids’ school gives the kids a massive chocolate brownie or ice cream or cookies or cakes for puddings every day. Also, the older kids’ school allows the kids to buy as many cakes as they want in a day from the canteen - WTAF?!?! The cakes are brownies, flapjacks, muffins and cookies. All full of sugar. Yet they ban cordial?!

One of my boys, when he was nine, used to tell the chef at that school that he wanted more lunch because he was hungry. She wouldn’t allow it as ‘County decides’ the size of the portions each child should have. So she’d deny him more pasta or chicken or whatever was on offer but then slap a bit fat calorie and sugar filled cake on his plate for pudding!!

To continue my rant - it can’t be about the spillage, at our schools, as the kids are not allowed to drink during lessons so can’t spill anything.

And almost last rant - every now and then, the school puts on a movie and encourages the kids to bring sweets - as many as they want - to eat during the movie. ‘Why are they not given a treat of additional PE or play time rather than a movie?’ I always ask. But, I send them in, to watch the movie like a good parent who does what they’re told. I don’t send sweets. But I do send cordial in the metal flask.

I’m kind of sorry, but not enough to stop. My kids are rarely off sick, their homework is always done, they perform well at school, we don’t take time off in term time, I volunteer as much as I can and they are well behaved. Surely that’s enough toeing the line and doing what we’re told.

I don’t always agree with what the schools decide is healthy and acceptable- I don’t agree with movies at school as a great, I don’t agree with sugary puddings, I don’t agree with marshmallows in hot chocolates at forest school along with s’mores - but, I toe the line on all of those and let my kids be involved. Even though I would never let my kids eat a s’more alongside a hot chocolate on a weekend, I allow them to participate at school.

I’m sure if you work in a school you understand the logic, but it’s lost on me…

If my kids’ schools commit to banning all sugar in the canteen and ‘treats’, then I’ll commit to working on my one child who drinks cordial.

epic rant over.

Autumn61 · 13/07/2022 03:53

School only allows it at lunchtime.

FrenchFancie · 13/07/2022 04:06

I work as a TA in year one. Firstly we know when a kid has juice and not water, we can smell it, and the kids can smell it: ‘Miss Fancie!! Robbie’s got juice!!’ About 30 nanoseconds into the day.

juice is bad for teeth, and it’s part of the healthy schools thing that we have to say water only, and try and police this, or Ofsted come down on us hard. Frankly the spills are a nuisance as some parents don’t dilute the juice very much and it gets rapidly sticky and smelly - and literally every day someone in my class of 23 spills a bottle, drops it, smashes it on the playground. Water water everywhere.

the best thing would be for parents and school to work together on this - parents can work at it by gradually reducing juice use at home, making it weaker and weaker over time - this helps teeth and after a while most kids get used to it. Most parents are happy to work with us on this, and understand the reason why we ask.

we do have a couple though who think that their child is special (but don’t have SEN obviously, just that rules shouldn’t apply to them) and that we are unreasonable for policing this - believe me the absolute worst part of my day is supervising lunchtimes and playtimes and being forced to have conversations with little kids over the fact that lunchboxes need at least something savoury in them, and that no they can’t have juice and need to refill their bottle with water. I just wish parents would understand that schools don’t have much discretion on this, if your kid doesn’t have SEN with food issues we have to try and get them (and by extension you) to comply with the ‘healthy schools’ stuff.

RockinHorseShit · 13/07/2022 07:07

TheSoundOfLunch
There is no “additional need” that means a child should have a sugary drink rather than water.

Well aren't you the ignorant one 🙄

I don't like tap water either, at least not where I live now as I grew up in an area with less chemicals added, so I can taste the chlorine & hardness & it's nasty & will make me gag.

Just because you don't have much of a palate & can't tell the difference, doesn't mean that's the same for all, including DCs

TheGreatBobinsky · 13/07/2022 07:20

Aslan007 · 12/07/2022 21:56

I can’t help wondering how your child got into the habit of only drinking juice?!?
My 3 year old still doesn’t know any better to this very day coz we as a family have only ever had water on the table and offered him water. It’s either that or nothing. The only juice he’s ever had is freshly sqeezed orange and even that’s once in a very blue moon. The last thing anyone needs is a toddler on a sugar high

Did you just not bother to read the many comments from multiple posters explaining this? Lots of parents are advised to give squash by healthcare professionals when their children are so dehydrated that they are unwell because they won't drink water.

TheGreatBobinsky · 13/07/2022 07:25

**and many of those children haven't had anything other than water, milk or formula offered to them up until that point. My children hadn't tasted squash until a GP categorically told me that ANY fluid is better than none and if my child was refusing water, squash was far better than allowing her to become unwell. I was exactly the same, my mum didn't give me anything other than water until I became very unwell through not drinking enough and she was told to give me squash.

Newmumatlast · 13/07/2022 07:34

This rule genuinely concerns me. My husband only drinks squash and not only that but a certain flavour from a certain shop. I drink anything though I have preferences. My child will only drink squash and only certain flavours though a little less picky than DH. What is not 100% clear is if this is a preference however I think it isnt because she will refuse other options even if clearly thirsty. She has gone all day without drinking if not the right drink. She is very picky with food too and won't eat certain textures and only blender things. Again it doesn't seem to be preference as she would rather go without anything.

My DH has ADHD. We think possibly also ASD but no assessment. I also have ADHD and as part of my assessment they couldnt confirm autism as it was only an ADHD assessment but I was told I have strong autistic traits. So odds are that our daughter will have a diagnosis at some stage. She has been referred but as developmentally she is above average, she's only on the cusp for referral based on the questions asked given shes a young toddler. It may be that we have to keep monitoring for a good few years more before a referral could result in diagnosis.

But what about the meantime? I recently discovered that at nursery though I send a bottle of juice and has noticed it barely seems touched, it actually seems it isn't being given to her as they have now explicitly referenced giving water (never mentioned before that they dont allow anything else). She won't drink it so that means no fluids at all while at nursery.

Newmumatlast · 13/07/2022 07:42

FrenchFancie · 13/07/2022 04:06

I work as a TA in year one. Firstly we know when a kid has juice and not water, we can smell it, and the kids can smell it: ‘Miss Fancie!! Robbie’s got juice!!’ About 30 nanoseconds into the day.

juice is bad for teeth, and it’s part of the healthy schools thing that we have to say water only, and try and police this, or Ofsted come down on us hard. Frankly the spills are a nuisance as some parents don’t dilute the juice very much and it gets rapidly sticky and smelly - and literally every day someone in my class of 23 spills a bottle, drops it, smashes it on the playground. Water water everywhere.

the best thing would be for parents and school to work together on this - parents can work at it by gradually reducing juice use at home, making it weaker and weaker over time - this helps teeth and after a while most kids get used to it. Most parents are happy to work with us on this, and understand the reason why we ask.

we do have a couple though who think that their child is special (but don’t have SEN obviously, just that rules shouldn’t apply to them) and that we are unreasonable for policing this - believe me the absolute worst part of my day is supervising lunchtimes and playtimes and being forced to have conversations with little kids over the fact that lunchboxes need at least something savoury in them, and that no they can’t have juice and need to refill their bottle with water. I just wish parents would understand that schools don’t have much discretion on this, if your kid doesn’t have SEN with food issues we have to try and get them (and by extension you) to comply with the ‘healthy schools’ stuff.

I think people do get the pressure schools are under but it is ridiculous parents arent allowed to give their children certain foods and drinks which yes may not be the most healthy option but really arent as awful as implied. I've always been perfectly healthy and teeth very good but drank juice at school as in the 90s we didnt have such levels of policing of drinks and food. I get stopping cans of coke and leftover maccy ds but some of the policing is extreme. It also makes little sense when the same schools (based on ones near us) serve things like battered fried fish and chips on a friday with cake for dessert yet intercept items which are fewer calories and saturated fats.

Newmumatlast · 13/07/2022 07:48

GoodThinkingMax · 12/07/2022 21:31

YABU. Water is best - squash is sugar and chemicals. Not a healthy drink and an insidious way of making children obese - the “hidden”calories. It’s also pretty tooth-rotting.

Funny people always say this and yes some truth in it but the sugar and calorie content in my child's juice is trace at best. Shes super skinny - you can see her ribs. Doesn't look like other toddlers with their baby chub. Extremely petite. And she brushes her teeth very well, goes to the dentist regularly and has had no issues with her teeth.

I drank squash and juices as a child and i was the same.

Both of us are/were very active. I know kids who drink only water who are overweight.

It's way more complex than drinking or not drinking juice ffs.

Av0bo11ie · 13/07/2022 14:40

Water only at our school

Pumperthepumper · 13/07/2022 17:56

Water only is such a stupid hill to die on. It’s so easy to have a box at the back of the room that the juice bottles go in.

UWhatNow · 13/07/2022 18:25

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Isaidnoalready · 13/07/2022 18:30

When people are talking about juice do they mean squash? Or actual juice?

Gaylies · 13/07/2022 20:36

TheSoundOfLunch · 11/07/2022 09:16

There is no “additional need” that means a child should have a sugary drink rather than water.

This is simply not true. Many kids with complex additional needs will absolutely refuse point blank to drink anything other than one specific brand/flavour of squash, or their chosen drink. Of course water is preferable but please don’t underestimate the wide range of additional needs out there. I don’t know if the OPs child has additional needs but do think this is important to realise.

TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross · 13/07/2022 21:42

Isaidnoalready · 13/07/2022 18:30

When people are talking about juice do they mean squash? Or actual juice?

I think lots of people use juice and squash interchangeably even though they are two completely different things!

Maybe calling it ‘juice’ makes it feel more healthy? 🤷‍♀️

TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross · 13/07/2022 21:44

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

What constitutes a qualified person? Because my dentist asks whether I drink fruit juice every time I go for a check up and hates the fact that I do. But I’ll be sure to tell him that UWhatNow knows better…