To refuse to give up time to help kids catch up?

[PeachyM]

So I’m a teacher. And we’re nearing the end of the school year- finally :) Two kids from the same family but in different years disappear off for a two week family holiday, which hasn’t been authorised. I’m not going to particularly question their parents’ decision because it’s up to them. But they’ve come back having missed two weeks of a core subject and the parents have now requested we give up time to help catch them up. I’ve said no because I already have a shit ton of end of year stuff to finish and I don’t have the time. Parents have accused me of being unreasonable and said that I’m refusing to do my job. Who’s in the wrong here?

[Bertieboo82]

y. A number of parents insisted that their children have learnt masses by going to Rome etc in term time and education is not limited to the basic subjects.

I took my children out of school for two days to go to Rome.

They ate a lot of pasta and ice cream, we did a bike tour, we did a lot of walking but “educational” ? Not in any way that would help with school and exams! Loads of Fun and a positive experience more broadly for them ? Yes.

Private school. I dropped head a line to explain due to work commitments this was only option to take out two days early. He just said to have a nice time!

[echt]

so they’ve come up with the generous suggestion that I give him quick catch up sessions during my break times

I imagine this would mean the morning break, which as it is paid time, at least in state schools can be required to be used as directed. That's why teachers can assigned yard duties. As teachers would have to factor in leaving their class, getting ready for the next, possibly moving rooms, etc. they would no sooner have sat down with the pupil than it would be time to go.

I think what goes through their delusional minds is that as the morning break might be 30 minutes (max) that their child would get 30 minutes catch-up. As if. Nice try though.

[Quincythequince]

OP YADNBU.
They will have to engage a tutor and be done with it, and I’ve NRTFT but I hope your SLT has made that clear to them.

Stupid parents firstly doing this I’m his year 10 year, and then expecting you to teach extra.

He has a whole six weeks now to catch up and they (not you) need to help him do so.

[Purple52]

The parents are in the wrong …… unless collectively they are willing to pay you to help their children catch up!
I suspect a couple of grand per child might cover it … enough for you to pay for a two week holiday somewhere!

[Purple52]

Can you find a PHSE lesson plan about how actions have consequences?!

[littlefireseverywhere]

We took DD y10 out of school for a week & she’s missed a maths module. We’ll get her a tutor to cover that, also regardless of reason of absence DD’s school puts the onus on the pupil to catch up from other classmates.

[Ideatcakeforbreakfast]

I'm a secondary teacher too and there is no chance I'd be giving up time either! We're in Scotland where parents can freely take their children out during term time and fine, if they want to that's up to them. However, you've done your job all year for countless pupils and it's not your problem if they've missed anything! They can catch up in their own time using whatever resources you shared for other pupils (we have Google classroom so my pupils are told to use that). I had a similar situation in April with a senior pupil who needed to complete units as at risk of failing her N5 - the mum took her on holiday the last week before study leave. I left messages for her to come in, passed it to senior management to deal with and she never came in. No way could I give up any more time, it was her exams, not mine.

[Majik]

YANBU but I'd definitely hope that you are in a union; they'll support you in any dispute if SLT get arsy

[climster]

Is this a joke? I am a teacher who is used to demanding parents. Be very clear about what you will do and then be very clear about what they need to do to support their children. Then clearly state at the start of the email that normally when children miss school because of a holiday then it is normally the parents' decision to do that knowing they will miss class time and core content. Then print out some sheets preferably with answers and also include materials for practice (links inc relevant passwords). Keep it nice and upbeat saying that provided they do this over the holidays then that will make up for what they missed and they will be ready to start next year. Any further issues then communicate with your HOD and pass it up.

[RelaxTheCacks]

Entitled parents need to be put back in their box, you are not being unreasonable, inform them there are plenty of tutors looking for work.

[1HappyTraveller]

Absolutely not your problem.

How self-entitled are they? Tell them to foxtrot Oscar that they need to support their own children in THEIR own time to help them catch up.

YANBU

[fUNNYfACE36]

Doesn't your school post everything on line that you've covered in class?
Doesn't your department run lunchtime 'clinics' for students who are struggling with a topic?
In a word. Yes I think you should help them.Ots not the students fault is it?

[echt]

@fUNNYfACE36

Doesn't your school post everything on line that you've covered in class?
Doesn't your department run lunchtime 'clinics' for students who are struggling with a topic?
In a word. Yes I think you should help them.Ots not the students fault is it?

Teachers are not paid during the lunch hour, so no-one can be made to staff 'clinics", or anything else in this time, before or after school.

I can assure you that posting lesson plans online is not the same as having been in the lesson. They are useful, what I did as a teacher, but not the same as being there. Never met a parent or student who thought so, either. They were glad they were, but knew they weren't substitute .

It's not the student's fault, but it's not the responsibility of the teacher either.

[00100001]

@fUNNYfACE36

Doesn't your school post everything on line that you've covered in class?
Doesn't your department run lunchtime 'clinics' for students who are struggling with a topic?
In a word. Yes I think you should help them.Ots not the students fault is it?

Nor is it the teacher's.

The parents are being unreasonable

[surreygirl1987]

Doesn't your school post everything on line that you've covered in class? Um... no!!!

[surreygirl1987]

The parents are in the wrong …… unless collectively they are willing to pay you to help their children catch up!

Even then, no. That should not be an expectation. I get asked by parents of children at my school sometimes if I'll tutor them. But I just don't want to. I don't have the time. I used to do some tutoring and charged £50 per hour but I'd still rather not these days. And there's nothing wrong with that!

[surreygirl1987]

This reminds me a bit of a parent who was complaining about a teacher at my school once. She said her issue with the teacher is that 'she treats teaching like a job'. I said 'yes... because it is!' The parents was annoyed that the teacher wasn't willing to do loads of after school and lunchtime sessions to help their child.

[neverbeenskiing]

The parents are in the wrong …… unless collectively they are willing to pay you to help their children catch up!

This still wouldn't be ok in my view. It puts the Teacher in an awkward position and suggests they don't respect the fact that school staff have a life and other commitments outside of work.

[GoodThinkingMax]

Yes I think you should help them

Are you a teacher, @fUNNYfACE36 ? Or just another parent who thinks teachers are some sort of personal resource for you, so you don't have to bother about your children's education ....

[neverbeenskiing]

It's not the students fault is it?

This attitude is one of the reasons there is a recruitment and retention problem in Teaching. It's emotional blackmail and implies that staff asserting any boundaries, or striving for some semblance of a work/life balance means they don't care about the children they work with, which is hugely insulting.

The parents have acted irresponsibly by taking their Year 10 child out of school, so now the onus is on OP to make sure that child doesn't miss out? Why on earth should OP feel more responsible for this situation than the parents who created it, or indeed the student who in Year 10 should be perfectly capable of asking a friend if they can borrow their work to catch up.

School staff spend their whole lives papering over the cracks caused by Parents who are not meeting their child's most basic needs. Feeding kids who come to school hungry, buying them equipment, san pro and toiletries out of our own pockets because otherwise they would go without, listening to their worries and problems because we know no one is listening to them at home, driving them to CAMHS appointments because we know otherwise they won't get the help they need, arranging for their bikes to be repaired so they can get to school, even washing their uniforms because we don't want them to be bullied for being smelly...just some of the things staff in my school do because you're right, its not the child's fault. But a line has to be drawn somewhere and OP is not unreasonable to consider this particular issue a matter of parental responsibility.

[1HappyTraveller]

@fUNNYfACE36

Doesn't your school post everything on line that you've covered in class?
Doesn't your department run lunchtime 'clinics' for students who are struggling with a topic?
In a word. Yes I think you should help them.Ots not the students fault is it?

Is this meant to be satire?

No it’s not the students fault. It’s the fault of the parents who took their kids out of school. So maybe the parents can pull their finger out and help their kids catch up in their time seeing as they took their kids on holiday during the teachers time?🤷‍♀️

some schools may run clinicians for kids who are struggling, not for kids who just fail to turn up.

YATA

[Quincythequince]

@fUNNYfACE36

Doesn't your school post everything on line that you've covered in class?
Doesn't your department run lunchtime 'clinics' for students who are struggling with a topic?
In a word. Yes I think you should help them.Ots not the students fault is it?

No, but it is their parents fault and they should be the ones to remedy this. It is ridiculous to ask the teacher to do this outside of normal lessons.

And what have lunchtime clinics, to help with consolidation of a topic, have to do with providing two missed weeks of teaching.

[Paula1990]

Lord, I love you Brits! Every time I read "cheeky fuckers" I can't help but giggle!!! 🤗

[pollyglot]

In my first year of senior school (Year 9 here), many years ago, DF had to work abroad for 6 months, and DM decided that we would all go too. We went to school in the foreign country, but they were already a year ahead in every subject, so maths, French, Latin, some aspects of science were as Swahili to me. Returning home, my maths teacher (understandably)refused to help me to catch up. She was a vile-tempered woman who took my ignorance in class out on me, and I ended up utterly failing maths. Parents couldn't have cared less. However, my absolutely lovely Latin teacher tutored me in morning assembly time of 20 minutes every day, and 6 weeks, I had caught up. I have been so grateful to that woman as she transformed my life, igniting a passion for the subject, and beyond. I have taught the language for years, and I know, have sparked the same passion in many of my students. I know that your situation is completely different, but my point is that a willing teacher can, and does, change lives.

[ChekhovsMum]

@pollyglot

In my first year of senior school (Year 9 here), many years ago, DF had to work abroad for 6 months, and DM decided that we would all go too. We went to school in the foreign country, but they were already a year ahead in every subject, so maths, French, Latin, some aspects of science were as Swahili to me. Returning home, my maths teacher (understandably)refused to help me to catch up. She was a vile-tempered woman who took my ignorance in class out on me, and I ended up utterly failing maths. Parents couldn't have cared less. However, my absolutely lovely Latin teacher tutored me in morning assembly time of 20 minutes every day, and 6 weeks, I had caught up. I have been so grateful to that woman as she transformed my life, igniting a passion for the subject, and beyond. I have taught the language for years, and I know, have sparked the same passion in many of my students. I know that your situation is completely different, but my point is that a willing teacher can, and does, change lives.

She was lucky though, wasn’t she, that she had that morning assembly time, rather than having a tutor group she had to register. And I wonder what her family life was like at home, and if she had kids, and how much time she spent exercising and relaxing. Let’s hope it was enough, but the average teacher today simply does not have that kind of time to spare without it directly impacting on their home life. Every minute of our time and more is filled.

You demand an hour from me during the working week; you take an hour from my time with my son and my partner, or from my very limited time with friends and extended family, or from my downtime, or from my sleep. Pick one that you think I should sacrifice for you.