Let a two and a half year old wander off in a shopping centre ??

[goforawander]

I saw my aunt and uncle the other day who said if there was one thing they learnt from having children, is to let them roam freer. They said I needed to let my two and a half year old walk off alone at the shopping centre...

Apparently she would find her way back to us. We were sitting in a coffee shop and she kept wanting to walk off. They said I should let her and she'd definitely come back.

I know they wouldn't have meant it in a horrible way at all, but I literally cannot take my eyes off her in public and the thought of letting her out of my sight terrifies me.

Aibu to think this is absolutely insane to let a two and a half year old walk around alone ?

A 2 year old?!? Are they insane? 😮

Yup completely insane. No other reactions is possible really.

Yep, that’s crazy. Never ask them to babysit.

Do they think your dc is a ddog?

Whilst I absolutely agree that you should not let a two year old wander around alone. Will people stop bringing up James Bulger. Whilst there is no guarantee that that tragic case is a one off I would expect it's incredibly rare for young children with evil intentions to be wandering around looking for a toddler to abduct. I listened to a documentary recently where a young woman was paralysed because a suicidal person had landed on her from a higher floor of a shopping centre but we don't all avoid these places in case someone is in there waiting to end their life.

I have seen very young children being allowed to wander off in large supermarkets - not those that have done a runner but obviously being allowed to wander around by themselves. It worries me every time I see it and sometimes I have ended up watching the child myself.

That is complete insanity. My 2.5 year old ran off in a shopping centre once. I lost her trying to chase her while also keeping track of my other 2.5 year old and 4 year old. It was so so scary even though it must have been less than a couple of minutes before someone led her back the way she’d come and we found her. I am very lucky she ran into the right people that day. I didn’t go to the shops on my own with the kids for ages after that.

Yep. They're ridiculous. Do they think toddlers are like homing pigeons, with some kind of instinct to know where their parents are?
I'll never forget ds running off in just an average sized supermarket when he was little. I found him by the checkouts - a kind shop worker was holding his hand and was about to take him to the service desk. Poor little boy was howling, absolutely distraught. Toddlers have no idea where they are and become very distressed if they can't find their parents.

Have they got toddlers mixed up with dogs?

Quite a few years back I was in a garden centre with a teeny ds when I spotted a boy about 9/10 looking very lost. It transpires he had gone to the loo but had then come out the wrong way (they are in a 'corridor' behind a false wall) and had got himself completely disoriented. He had come from the café but simply couldn't work out where it was. I walked him back to it. If an older person child can that easily get confused, it will be much worse for a 2 year old.

Yes just horrific, there are no words.

The only place my 2+5 year olds roam freely is soft play which is locked and you need a staff member to let you out

Yeah, that’s absurd.

Apart from the child’s own safety, you need to keep an eye on a toddler because if you don’t, they will likely be a nuisance to other people - eg if they trot off into a shop and start yanking things off the shelves or helping themselves to sweets, or they trip up a waitress carrying a tray of hot drinks, or whatever. Also if someone sees a two-year-old waddling about on its own, they are likely to end up trying to find the parents, getting security to come - which if the parents have just let the kid drift off alone on purpose has wasted everyone’s time.

I haven't read any of the responses, but I hope you realise that you can never leave your child with these nutters.

My aunt lost me on a busy road junction in Blackpool when I was 4. She said I was too old for hand holding in the middle of a huge crowd. I was left on the kerb unable to see her or my cousins as they had taken the opportunity to dodge the traffic and cross. It felt like a long time but must have been only a few minutes before they came to find me. I was absolutely terrified and had no idea what direction she'd gone off in. I was found holding the hand of a kind gentleman who offered to take me across the road in a totally different direction. It really didn't help that English wasn't my first language. I was distraught, but shocked into silence by the whole thing, so no screaming or crying. I have never forgotten the feeling of being on my own surrounded by strangers. My mother realised something had happened when I was returned home and had night terrors for the first time ever. I never went to stay with her again until I was 10. On that occasion she cut off all my long hair.....
Don't ever let them look after your DC

Even the thought of letting my toddler wander off makes me feel sick. The furthest my 8yo is allowed to go by herself in a shopping centre is the toilets and that’s only when I’m outside waiting.

Your aunt and uncle are batshit!

Your post made me read up again on what happened to James Bulger. I really really wish I hadn't looked. Don't ever listen to anything these idiots have advised you to do. They don't have a clue.

Yes, that's a really great suggestion from them. 🙄 Did you honestly need a thread for this?

I fairly recently started letting my 8, nearly 9 year old do stuff like go to the toilet by himself when we in a cafe while we wait at the table or go get items from the next aisle in the supermarket then come back to me....at age 2? Nope! You don't need to give a 2 year old independence, this is stuff you do when they are later junior years in preparation for them getting more independence at senior school!

Wtf? Yes that's insane. Keep looking after your child... and I wouldn't leave him alone with them if that's what they think!

Before I had DC and knew better, I took my eyes off my toddler nephew for about 30 seconds to help my DSis who was struggling to work the ticket machine. he vanished, We found him on an escalator. No way would he have found his way back to us. I think people forget very quckly what the realities for childcare are like with toddlers.

Are they winding you up? Do they see themselves as funny? Or are they just thick?

I was a holiday nanny for a family staying on an island - they let the 2 year old take herself out of the house and down to the beach. Once I even caught her on the pier with nobody but her 5 year old sister to supervise!! They were so laid back they were horizontal those people.

They are insane! My first thought was poor little James Bulger. That scenario is unlikely but a toddler could easily got out on to the road and get hit by a car , or even just get lost and how terrified that might be for a little one

Absolutely batshit. I once found a little boy aged about 4 wandering around outside a shopping centre. Nobody else around so I knew I had to act. He told me that his mum.had left him in the car and he had got out. I took him to the shopping centre management office , I had my own young done with me which helped, I didn't feel too much like a child abductor!! Luckily he knew his mums first and last names and as I was walking away I heard them putting a tannoy out for her