Let a two and a half year old wander off in a shopping centre ??

[goforawander]

I saw my aunt and uncle the other day who said if there was one thing they learnt from having children, is to let them roam freer. They said I needed to let my two and a half year old walk off alone at the shopping centre...

Apparently she would find her way back to us. We were sitting in a coffee shop and she kept wanting to walk off. They said I should let her and she'd definitely come back.

I know they wouldn't have meant it in a horrible way at all, but I literally cannot take my eyes off her in public and the thought of letting her out of my sight terrifies me.

Aibu to think this is absolutely insane to let a two and a half year old walk around alone ?

YANBU or over protective. Your attitude is complely normal and they are breath takingly bonkers. As PP said, don't ever let them babysit

Agree they have forgotten how child development works - that's much too young. In a shopping centre?? Batshit. Also terrifying on a beach.

Also if you think about what they have said, they're telling you that they didn't do this. Maybe ask them why they didn't do it at the time and why they think it's now the right choice.

Absolute madness! Children are not cats … they don’t have a homing instinct at all. If anything toddlers are the opposite they have no common sense at that age and see the world in a very different way

Aibu to think this is absolutely insane to let a two and a half year old walk around alone?

Yes absolutely insane!

Kid who wonder off do not find their way back. That’s why announcements are made over the tannoy for parents to pick up a child. I remember getting lost in a small familiar department store once. I wasn’t even 2, I was 4. And the more I tried to find mum, the more lost I got. Eventually, I was taken to the office and picked up from there. Imagine how much worse that would be in a modern shopping centre.

I was with your aunt and uncle totally - many children today would benefit form much more freedom

Then I noticed the age - 2.5

WTF

No but I would have 2 a two year old in a high chair and teach them to sit still

I'm just surprised that your toddler doesn't have a job yet 🙄🙄🤣🤣

Did you not reply mentioning James Bulger? I always tell my dc to stay close in shopping centres. I have an 11yo I let go places on his own and 8yo who I keep much closer. At 2 your biggest risk is a responsible adult finding them and turning them over to mall security and you'd be terrified and waste loads of time looking for them.

That is insane! I wouldn’t even let my oldest who is 9 wander off and come back later.

At a park, I would let her wander off to the toilet and come back, but never a shopping centre

That's crazy!

Are they insane

I doubt Denise Bulger would agree 💔

That's terrible advice. By all means allow them freedom to play in appropriate settings like soft play, playgrounds, out on country walks, but a shopping centre, no way. I was at a shopping centre near here that has a little outdoor play area and a little while back saw a young boy wander off and run down the little precinct thing where all the cafes are and right into the centre. He was going through the doors by the time I alerted his parents to this fact, they had no idea. That is carelessness, not allowing freedom.

I wouldn't trust my 6 year old to roam free, let alone a 2 year old. My 3 year old is thankfully quite docile and happy to sit next to me 98% of the time....but even she's had her moment at a soft play where someone had left the gate open and I had my back turned to check on a baby I was looking after - she ended up outside the soft play! Thank god she asked a member of staff for help but it could have been soooo much worse!

My eldest on the other hand could give David Copperfeild a fun for his money with her disappearing acts 🤦‍♀️ she has no sense of danger whatsoever either.

My almost 5 year old is beginning to develop a 'homing' instinct and a sense of self-preservation. We were in a cafe in an outdoor shopping area (pedestrianised) the other day and, after we finished our drinks, DC ran off around the corner without waiting for their lumbering pregnant parent to pick up the bags and follow. I found DC just around the corner looking a little frightened and sheepish, waiting for me.

At 2, not a chance! DC was a runner and would have kept going and not stopped, especially if near a fountain, escalator, automatic doors, toy shop or any other similar attraction. DC especially liked dodging into lifts and pressing the buttons at that age 😬.

Crikey no. Toddlers are speedy, lack common sense and are a complete liability - they can get into trouble very quickly even in a familiar, safe place!

They are bonkers!!!

Ah yes, because toddlers are well known for their sense of direction, ability to cope in stressful situations and communication skills......Or not.

Have they been watching that Japanese program on Netflix?

They need to watch the James Bulgar documentary. The mother turned her back to pay for something in a shop and he was gone forever.

Good grief, are they quite mad?

My youngest was a bolter. From the moment he could walk, he was trying to run off. He managed to escape from preschool twice - through a security door and two sets of double automatic doors. The first occasion I turned my back for a second to pick up his lunch box. Found him playing "hide and seek" behind the bike rack in the car park. Did the same to my mum when she picked him up once. Didn't matter how many times we told him not to, he still kept trying to escape.
He didn't learn any sort of "homing instinct" until quite a bit older. He would also scream blue murder if I put him on reins or anything similar and would then flop on the floor and refuse to move.
I did have one trick though - at age 2 he was obsessed with his older brother's wellies. When he wore them he couldn't run and when he had them on the wrong feet (don't ask, toddlers, eh?) he could only walk quite slowly. He'd still head off wherever the hell he wanted, but I was able to catch up with him!
Toddlers are a total liability and you can't let them out of your sight for a second because they're basically mobile babies.

Absolutely NOT.

And as others have said, NEVER let this pair of idiots babysit your child for a second.

Statistically it is very unlikely that a paedophile is sitting and waiting for you to let your child wander off but why make it any easier for the one who might be watching and waiting ? What does a 2 year old gain from wandering off ? At that age they need a sense of security, they are not teenagers who need to be taking risks in order to learn and grow. People who go on and on about how free their DC are, tend to focus on themselves in order to show off their parenting techniques, and forget that their focus should be on their DC.

My 2 boys were wanderers too. They, if given the chance would have gone so far they definitely wouldn’t be able to find their way back. I once watched my ds1 who was about 18 months at the time wander off into some woods near us. I watched him to see if he’d turn back at any point and check if I was there and he didn’t, he just went off to start his new life in the forest 😂 obviously I went and got him. I took it as a good sign he was confident and securely attached that he knew I would come and find him.

Leaving them to wander off in a shopping centre is absolute madness. Anything could happen.

If only all 2 year olds were neuro typical. Fancy swapping lives ?? Yours sounds perfect.

I work in a large shop and we have a missing child at least once a day. Even more during the school holidays. Do not do this.