AIBU to find working much harder now the kids are in school?

[Thebeastofsleep]

When I got pregnant with DC1 I didn't think I would return to work, or if I did I would work part time. Turns out I hated mat leave and being a SAHP so returned full time after 12 months. DC went to a lovely nursery and all was good. When I had DC2, I again wanted to return full time, no issues. Nursery was great, kids loved it and it was all very easy. Everyone said to me "bet you can't wait until they go to school" etc like it was going to be easier or something? But I find it much harder. We chose a school with excellent wrap around care, so no issues in that regard however there's so much more to do - school fairs, plays, sports days, trips etc. It isn't even much cheaper. I'm finding it emotionally much harder to work now that they are in school. AIBU?

I pay wraparound it's £15 per day £7.50 am and the same pm but school holidays are expensive as I have 2 so that's about £30-35 per day each!!!

I use the government tax free childcare to save 20% but it's still a lot and it worries me when dd gets to 11/12 leaving her all summer while we work as we don't have any family to help and the clubs are generally for primary age children

Can I ask why you thought it would be easier when they got to school - what did you think would be easier?

For me it seems obvious that nursery (open 8-6, 51 weeks a year) was more straightforward than school (9-3, 13 weeks holiday to cover), so I’m really surprised by the people who think/ say ‘school is easier’

On a related note, I’m on a local parenting group on FB, and have noticed that every spring there are a few posts saying ‘my child is starting school in September, how do people cover the school holidays when they work and don’t have family nearby???’ And I find myself wondering why this didn’t occur to them when they did their school application - didn’t they think to ask about wraparound care and holiday clubs?

I’m finding it so much harder now they’re at school. My parents live 3 hours away so I used to book off a Friday and Monday and go down there for long weekends. My husband goes away with work a lot so I used to go down my mums a lot but now I can’t or if I do it’s drive down after school and back on a Sunday.

Also find the getting the schools bags and uniform ready a chore etc.

Shock horror, who knew some of bringing up children would be a chore?! Some of life is a chore, just get on with it.

@EllieQ because people don't plan ahead and think other parents are lying.

I've already worked out which schools have holiday schemes/camps on my area and my DD is 3. (She is actually old enough to attend one but I don't want her to yet.) But then I've helped out one of my siblings with their children as they ran out of work holiday so am aware of the issues.

I've got a foot in both camps with one in Reception and one at private nursery.
We picked our school mainly for the wraparound provision. Mine loves it so much that when I arrived at pick up time on Thursday I was sent away again (we only live around the corner) so I let her have another half an hour.
School camps are £30 pd with the option of earlier drop off/later pick up and wraparound care is 7.50-8.50 (£4) and 3.10-6 (£10) but only just started doing ad hoc so I booked for the year.

I absolutely agree OP. I have one in nursery and one in primary and the difference is stark. I feel like a PA. It has taken me a few weeks to organise childcare for the summer holidays - coordinating between two sets of grandparents and other school parents for holiday clubs.

Aside from the admin, the two things I probably find hardest compared to nursery are 1. having to drop off/pick up at a very specific time and 2. fitting in extracurricular clubs, plus the admin that this requires. DS does ASC three days per week, so if he does clubs at school that is fine, but anything out of school requires a mad dash home, quick dinner, then out again and going through so many transitions in a rush can be quite stressful.

In terms of costs, we pay ~£17 for ASC (expensive, I know) and ~£30 for holiday club. There are many holiday clubs around with different activities on offer, but the issue I find is that DS doesn't necessarily want to go somewhere if he doesn't know anyone. I sent him to one when he was 5 and was phoned at work as he was in tears and just wanted to come home 😥. Since then I've been a lot more cautious and tend to send him to the same provider that runs the ASC, or try to coordinate with other parents.