boyfriend begging me to text him back

[Amethystbluexo]

hi wise mumsnet.

i had an argument with my boyfriend approximately two days ago. Think something trivial, watching an episode of a series without the other and it blew up from that. We don’t live together.

Generally he is a sweet and very loving guy, and we’ve been together for over a year now. The argument led from being passive aggressive to full blown insults. I’m hurt because he made degrading comments about my breast size (which he reassured me plenty about in the past) and very bluntly said “you could never make me cum anyway”

Fyi he has ejaculation issues due to being anxious around his surroundings but also could be caused by the fact he is quite underweight. I’ve supported him throughout both of these issues so for my body to be brought up in insult i am incredibly hurt by this.

He texted me afew laters apologising but i was just too hurt to even respond. He’s once again texted me an hour ago begging me to talk to him and respond but at the moment i genuinely want nothing to do with him.

AIBU to not want to talk?

What a nasty disgusting pig he is. I'm sorry that your relationship is over - that's always hard to deal with - but it has to be after this, doesn't it? Just be thankful you didn't get married or have kids with him.

He sounds like a wanker and you’re better off without him. Stay strong sister ❤️

You're not unreasonable to be upset or even not to want anything else to do with him. But assuming you've been on more than one date I think it's only decent to send a message letting him know it's over. Ghosting is really poor

Not unreasonable at all. You'd be doing yourself a favour to never speak to him again. Arguments happen but personal insults are never an acceptable way to express your point or anger, they are always intended to hurt and undermine. I question the maturity of anyone who thinks they can make up for insulting someone's body with an apology, it doesn't work that way.

Stuff not talking to him. Finish with the looser.

Words are like toothpaste, you can't put them back in.

I'd message him asking him to give you some space to process what he's said. Then ignore. Just because there's a risk hell just turn up at the house.

What you so from here is up to you, but if you accept his apology then he needs to know in no uncertain terms that if it happens again then there will be no going back and mean it. Don't get into the cycle of rows and big make ups.

Personally I'm a bit too old to put up with that even once.

Nope. Dump him. He's no prince.

Interesting that he went for physical insults which says a lot more about him than you.

Bullet dodged.

Reply to him and tell him to get to fuck, then block and delete.

He sounds awful and has shown his true colours. Get rid now and save yourself more trouble.

He's purposefully targeted something he knows will hurt you his every intent was to hurt you. Over a TV show!

He's shown you who he truly is believe him.

I'm not clear what you want.

If you want to end the relationship, tell him.

I would be inclined to send a short message, saying 'ah, we are clearly very incompatible then. Lucky we realise it now and not years down the line. Goodbye'. Then no more contact.

Fucking get rid of him. What an awful way to turn on a person who's supported him and been so patient with him. I'm sorry this happened to you @Amethystbluexo.

Sounds like you're best off without him tbh. Put him back and find someone better - the sex might improve too!

Drop him. He's awful.

My feeling, and from personal experience, tells me that his behaviour will only get worse, should you choose to carry on seeing him.

Fuck me, I never say this but LTB immediately. Vile and irredeemable thing to say. I'd never have sex with such a person.

Ugh that’s unforgivable. Dump him. Abusive little prick.

Reply with please do not ever contact me again.

Oh fuck that. He's a nasty little boy. Amd that's best case scenario. Worst case scenario, this is him testing to see if he can abuse you and you will forgive him.

I'd text him and tell him you won't be spoken to like that and that it's completely over.

Seriously, who the hell does he think he is!
Pathetic.

Sorry he turned out to be a shit op. Still, guess it's best to found out now rather than if you'd had kids with him or something.

Change your locks if you think that there is any chance he could have a key to your home.

You need to make it very clear it is over - boundaries have been crossed and block and move on

Ugh. He can’t unsay such disgusting things and you cant unhear them. I couldn’t come back from that. This relationship is over. Dump, block, move on and be glad of your lucky escape

He has shown you the way he deals with conflict or disagreement. It’s the way he will probably deal with future conflict as well.

I would simply respond to him, calmly, and say “Things were said that can never be taken back. I wish you well for the future but your future won’t include me.”

You can't be with someone who verbally and emotionally abused you when they're angry. It will eat away at your seld

*self esteem
Plus it will never change.

Sounds like you have dodged a bullet.

Put him and his non working willy in the bin. You deserve better.