In the past 2 years, nursery illness has ruined

[Wouldloveanother]

Every bank holiday bar one. Maybe 15-20 weekends? Both of DH’s birthdays. A weekend away. Too many occasions and plans to even count. I am so done with it, another weekend ruined and I just want to cry.

This is such a kind comment ❤️ Makes a change from 9/10 above who are berating the person who posted, yours is very kind and compassionate. You sound like a lovely person x

I meant unusual, not unreasonable!

I was saying it's not normal and I think you are right to question it.

Op, the best thing you can do for your sanity and your dd is to just pay privately to see a peadritrician. They will address any potential asthma issues better and offer you an experienced view about your DD health.
You have my sympathy as working and the anxiety of having to take time off caring for a child that’s unwell a lot of the time is awful; my DS was eventually diagnosed with asthma but I had a long time of him being off nursery with a cough ( constant covid tests ) allergies etc.. and yes they are getting lots of bugs post lockdown .. my DD always has a cold ! 💐

Oh chicken burgers we are in exactly the same place mentally 😞
I have gone from being a fairly laidback mother who didn’t panic at all when DD got her first illness, to an anxious wreck who checks her temperature EVERY night before I go to bed, just in case she’s building a temperature again. The first thing I do when she gets back from nursery is feel her forehead. If she coughs I instantly feel sick and get a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. I compulsively check our supply of calpol and nurofen to make sure we have enough to see us through a couple of bugs at least. I’m constantly asking DD if she feels poorly. It’s wrecked my mental health, my confidence as a mother and the last 2 years of my life frankly.
i said to DH even when she stops getting ill as much it’s going to take me years to get back to where I was in my head.
i really feel for you. When the fuck will all this stop?

I hope this doesn’t sound ‘off’ but my manager doesn’t have kids, and while she hasn’t said anything directly I get the feeling she thinks I’m taking the piss - I don’t think she believes a child can get ill this much. To be fair I wouldn’t have believed it before I had a child either.

Calpol
nurofen
humidifier
snufflebabe
crack the f on with life

Ive found that it often comes in waves and it all comes at once to make it as shit as possible to deal with.

My eldest had an awful February one year where she got noro twice and both times was borderline for a drip so was off for at least 2 weeks out of the month. We had a horrific winter in 2019 including 2 hospitalisations for my youngest within a month for different illnesses then chicken pox x2. I was v lucky to be on maternity leave during that period otherwise god knows how I’d have managed work.

Last winter was bad and I didn’t have an undisrupted night’s sleep from October to March as my youngest (again) managed to get everything under the sun and became very distressed at night. Throw in the odd bout of sickness for my eldest just to shake things up and we were on our knees.

on the plus side… my eldest is generally sickness free and is pretty robust. The only time she was off last year was when she had covid and this year when she had a vomiting bug.

I have a child who is ill with a temp of about 39/40 degrees every month. Normally no other symptoms and it’ll last 5-7 days a time. Occasionally red tonsils but sometimes not. It is so unbelievably stressful and they’re fine in between times. At least we don’t have to do effing covid tests anymore. GP doesn’t know why they’re ill, just says it’s normal. We’re waiting on a paeds appt but there aren’t any. He eats well, is healthy, growing fine, meeting milestones etc. just has this super active immune system that goes nuts at the drop of a hat (or virus).

I’m so sorry you’re in the same place mentally as me, it’s actually such a shit place to be.

My eldest got quite alot of coughs and often ended up with croup as a toddler but very rarely was he really sick. Only times he’s been to a and e was after he decided to try out a plug in air freshner that I thought was out of reach but clearly wasn’t and to check for broken bones after an accident. There was a query over asthma for him as he had a wheeze for ages, but this did clear on its own after a few years and didn’t really bother him, worried me more than it upset him! Whereas my middle has been to a and e three times this year alone cos he just gets hit so hard by illnesses. And it’s so frequent!! The longest he’s gone since he started nursery March last year is 6 weeks without being on his knees, can’t leave the sofa let alone the house ill. I’ve actually got a doctors appointment with him in a couple of weeks and I’m going to push for tests cos I don’t know any other kids who gets ill and hit as hard frequently as him. And then sometimes he passes it on to either us or his siblings, or my eldest will occasionally bring home something just to mix it up. I feel the same as you, when will this ever end?!

How old is he Bruisedskies?

DD ish 3.5 and only since the start of this year has she stopped getting ill constantly, she started nursery just before 2 and in that time had about 20 covid tests plus some more illnesses that weren't testable. She had to cancel going away on weekends and her own birthday party and just general plans to the point where we had to stop telling her about any plans because there such a high chance of if being cancelled. She was at a childminder for a little bit just after 1 and that was possibly worse!

The HV was astonished by how much she got sick and suggested talking the the GP, I didn't get to it before it got better. She is a very anxious child and apparently stress can make kids more prone to sickness so that might explain how bad it was for her but she's still not really any calmer tbh.

Bloody is normal. My lockdown has been constantly sick. Now he’s a bit bigger he’s not floored by the violent fevers do much, but the amount of temperatures we’ve had, febrile convulsions, runny noses, bottles of Calpol, phone calls to GPs, not to mention two ambulances (sent by 111 in one case and called by me in the other following the first seizure), all in all, it’s been insane. Tonsillitis, ear infections, chicken pox, hand foot and fucking mouth…you name it, we’ve all had it.

Lockdown baby*

Just wanted to jump on in here and say you're not alone OP! It's been a lot calmer the last couple of months for us, but from September-April my DD age 3 was ill every few weeks! Similarly, most of the time it was a cough with a high temp and runny nose, lethargic but not COVID. We tested her so many times I lost count.

Touch wood, but it really has gotten a lot better for us, however I'm not sure why as we haven't changed anything really! Maybe her immune system just built up a tolerance? Or maybe it will start all over again in the autumn! Who knows?

It's frustrating and tiring so I can fully sympathise! I really hope things improve for you all soon!

Same when my DD was at nursery. Every two weeks without fail fever, virus etc. At school now and not so bad. Was a tough few years.
Second child not so bad - third child went to childminder and had a lot less illnesses in first few years.

With young children the reaction to cold bugs and other viruses can really vary. Some children are far more prone to getting temperatures. Some young children vomit when they have a cold. Some might tend to be a bit snotty and that’s it.

I have looked after a lot of children and I can well believe your experience.

This is nothing new and nothing to do with covid. Mine were at nursery 25 years ago and it was just as bad. All my annual leave used up on poorly children, DHs as well.

With dd it’s always, always, always a temperature. I don’t think she’s ever been unwell without one.

My middle child is like this, everytime he gets a cold he gets a temp. It used to go straight to his chest (he’s nearly 5 now so immune system is better but still gets a temp for a day) and you would hear him wheezing. Had a viral induced wheeze once when he was 1, ended up in hospital with a nuberliser.
Older child never had any problems.
I think if you don’t have a child like this, you don’t understand. Funnily enough he was the one breastfed for 3 years while the older one was on formula! I’m just glad he’s growing out of it & coping better. There’s nothing additionally wrong with him, he just seems to come down with things worse than my eldest.

After 6 months of my son having a persistent cough on and off, I took him to see a pediatrician. They have discovered he has abnormally large tonsils and needs to have them and adenoids removed. They are causing obstructive sleep apnea and the persistent cough. He would get a high temp to start with then the cough.
This is something that wouldn't come up in a blood test, so may be worth asking the gp to check her tonsils and refer her to a specialist.

I would be pushing my gp to investigate more, doesn't sound right, I didn't ever not do something planned due to illness nor did they have a day off preschool for illness. They went from 2 (dd1) and 1 (dd2)

I’ve not read the full thread but here for solidarity OP, currently sat in A&E yet again with DS3.

He’s one of those kids who even when he gets a mild cold it ends up as croup or a viral wheeze so we’re constantly battling it. He’s had one of each this month as well as chicken pox. It’s exhausting!

Thankfully I’ve got a flexible workplace, a DH who can share and parents who can step in sometimes but having to juggle it all and get my work done and try not to feel guilty about literally everything you’re not doing at 100% is wearing.

It’s a bit easier now that nursery will let him in with a cough whereas pre April he’d have to stay at home. Covid did definitely make it harder for a long time.

I’m relying on him having an immune system of steel when he gets to school!

Not where I live. I’m glad things have been much easier for you.

I don't know why you're getting some of these snotty replies. Ours are 4 and 2. Incredibly healthy (get that from DH not me) - 4 yo has had one antibiotic ever, 2yo only ever been at GP for immunisations.

Sept to Dec I think DH and I both worked five days in a week once, maybe twice. I remember us celebrating. Every cough or temperature meant a PCR and isolation so that was at least one day off to get tested and plans cancelled if it was the weekend. That's not our nursery being strict that's just what all of us were supposed to be doing at that time.

4yo got a high temp on the evening of 23 Dec, meaning Christmas plans were rearranged for multiple households until the 24 Dec PCR result came through on Christmas morning and we could host as originally planned.

Jan-March weren't too bad, although the only vomiting bug coincided with our first night out to an event in 4 years so that was cancelled.

April we all got covid and that killed plans for Easter, DD1's birthday and my first solo night away in two years.

May DD1 got chickenpox.

June DD1 got croup (at 4! Taking the piss now surely), then they both got a tummy bug that meant I had to cancel a couple of nights away to meet my newborn niece.

1 July DD1 started new childcare provision and threw up on day 1. So they'll love us.

It's fucking relentless. I'm up at this hour with snotty, coughing DD2 who can't settle. Will need to LFT her in the morning but hopefully she'll be ok for nursery.

I don't remember it being anywhere near as bad with dd1 pre covid, and that was the traditionally bad first winter at nursery.

I feel your pain my DS is the same any illness and he gets a high temp even if it's just exposure to a cold!
We have been back and fourth with the Dr but basically been told his immune reaction is to have a fever. We were told to stop treating the number and go by how he was so if he seemed fine then no need for calpol/ibuprofen I he felt ill then to give it.

We were also told that due to lack of earlier exposure thanks to lockdown illnesses for toddlers are spreading like wildfire and causing more of a response.

It is worrying especially with a temp over 38.5 each time but my DS can still be quite content til he hits 39! We now give ibuprofen and monitor him if he's OK in himself but just a high temp then we give ibuprofen before and be still goes to nursery if he's unwell then he stays home. We spoke to his nursery about it and they were happy for this approach with a Dr's letter stating its his response. It's made life a lot easier

I thi k you just have to keep reminding yourself they will have the immune system of a ox by the time school starts!