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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

If you didn’t have siblings, family your closes to, spouse and kids, who would you leave your inheritance to?

126 replies

YouAreNotBatman · 30/06/2022 13:50

The title.

OP posts:
Delectable · 30/06/2022 19:17

A charity that provides education for the poorest children. Compassion UK, Hope Foundation, Right To Succeed, Children's trust and friend's children.

mydogisthebest · 30/06/2022 19:21

Me and DH don't have any children. He has no contact with any of his family. I have 2 siblings but they are both well off so do not need any extra money.

Our wills leave money to 2 homeless charities and 5 animal charities

Dancingwithhyenas · 30/06/2022 19:21

I’d leave it in trust to be used to help pupils of a local school who need it and Home for Good (Charity to encourage fostering & adoption)

Can’t imagine leaving money to animals when so many people are struggling.

Narcheska · 30/06/2022 19:22

Split between my 2 best friends although one has children and one doesn’t so an option would be to leave the 50% destined for best friend with children split between here 3 kids so they’d have a decent nest egg each when the time came

knittingaddict · 30/06/2022 19:22

I would probably split it between a close friend (if I had one) and a charity. Not the big charitys though. It would be a small local one with relatively low overheads and that doesn't advertise on the TV.

Dahlietta · 30/06/2022 19:27

Same. I’d lie on my deathbed wrapped in Hermes scarves.
😂

PeskyRooks · 30/06/2022 19:32

Small local cat home and very small local donkey sanctuary run by one dedicated amazing woman.

BottlingBurpsForGrandma · 30/06/2022 19:36

Probably my best friends' children, but if I didn't have DH and kids I'd have never met them so I,guess non-close family like cousins

Carrieonmywaywardsun · 30/06/2022 19:37

Either a close friend or two or some charities- local food bank, homeless support, Winston's wish

BingoBungle · 30/06/2022 19:37

Means-tested bursaries at my old schools and universities. I love the idea of helping young people full of promise. I dislike scholarships and prizes as they tend to be taken up by children who present as being very clever when in fact they’re merely very well supported by their parents.

StarDolphins · 30/06/2022 19:38

Before I had my DD I had made a will…

split 3 ways between…
Many Tears
Freshfield Animal Sanctuary
Allycats rescue

My DD is my only family that will be alive when I die - I only have an elderly Mum & Uncle currently.

RomeoOscarXrayIndigoEcho · 30/06/2022 19:44

A women's charity. No doubt.

SweatyChamoisPad · 30/06/2022 20:00

What I would add is that sometimes a bequest can really change someone’s life if they use it wisely, and it doesn’t have to be much. My dad’s cousin died with no spouse or children and left us all a couple of grand. It came out of the blue and I wanted to do something with it to remember his generosity. I thought about a piece of art or jewellery but in the end went to India and Nepal - right out of my comfort zone at the time.

That trip gave me confidence, a lasting love of Nepal, and of trekking. My new love of trekking made me want to get out into the hills more, and that introduced me to new friends, who gave me a heads up about a job in a different industry, that set my life on a different trajectory, a different city, and a boyfriend. All from a £3,000 bequest in 2010. I’ll never forget his generosity.

KosherDill · 01/07/2022 10:12

SweatyChamoisPad · 30/06/2022 20:00

What I would add is that sometimes a bequest can really change someone’s life if they use it wisely, and it doesn’t have to be much. My dad’s cousin died with no spouse or children and left us all a couple of grand. It came out of the blue and I wanted to do something with it to remember his generosity. I thought about a piece of art or jewellery but in the end went to India and Nepal - right out of my comfort zone at the time.

That trip gave me confidence, a lasting love of Nepal, and of trekking. My new love of trekking made me want to get out into the hills more, and that introduced me to new friends, who gave me a heads up about a job in a different industry, that set my life on a different trajectory, a different city, and a boyfriend. All from a £3,000 bequest in 2010. I’ll never forget his generosity.

What a wonderful outcome!

KosherDill · 01/07/2022 10:15

Dancingwithhyenas · 30/06/2022 19:21

I’d leave it in trust to be used to help pupils of a local school who need it and Home for Good (Charity to encourage fostering & adoption)

Can’t imagine leaving money to animals when so many people are struggling.

Animals are struggling too, thanks to humans wantonly overpopulating this poor burning planet.

I'd rather save one elephant than 100 humans with my bequests.

xogossipgirlxo · 01/07/2022 10:19

Some charity, but I don't know which one.

AntlerRose · 01/07/2022 10:20

A charity that supports learning disabled adults during the day time. Not a residential home but something open to those in care homes, assisted living or living with parents still. My friends struggle to find things after 18. Its like peoole forget disabled children grow up.

Quicknamechangefortoday · 01/07/2022 10:23

I would hunt high and low, probably needing to use a magnifying glass, to find charities that still care about the rights and safety of women and children above all else.

peanutbutter00 · 01/07/2022 10:25

I won't be having children so I'll be planning firstly to save for care in my old age should I need it. Then whatever's left would be split between charities and my best friends children

comealongponds · 01/07/2022 10:26

I currently still have both parents (which I’m grateful for) so if I die, everything goes to them (I don’t have a will as don’t have much to leave but intestacy rules would split it equally between them which suits me fine).

assuming i outlived both parents, I will need to make a will as my only other close relative is a sibling I don’t speak to.

I’ll probably leave it all to my best friend. She’s far more like a sister to me than my actual sibling.

(no partner and no kids).

It’s all very well saying spend the lot, but none of us know how long we’re going to live, and don’t want to end up with nothing to live on because I spent everything too early!

CredibilityProblem · 01/07/2022 10:29

I'd ask around to see whether any friends and acquaintances are really struggling. Failing that, I'd see what www.givingwhatwecan.org recommends, probably with a few additional bequests to smaller local charities as well.

StarDolphins · 01/07/2022 10:29

KosherDill · 01/07/2022 10:15

Animals are struggling too, thanks to humans wantonly overpopulating this poor burning planet.

I'd rather save one elephant than 100 humans with my bequests.

Absolutely with you on this @KosherDill humans destroy animal for fun, animals don’t & I will always give to animals as my 1st choice. Everyone is entitled to choose their chosen charity!

MsFannySqueers · 01/07/2022 10:36

This is a very interesting thread. The outcomes from a relatively small bequest can be fantastic.In fact life changing for Sweatychamoispad. I remember a small bequest I received from my godfather. I was so skint at the time as a single parent it really helped me. So sad the charities who don’t even bother to acknowledge receiving a bequest. Recently we have had a neighbour die. No children or immediate family. She hadn’t updated her will following her husband’s death. Most of the beneficiaries are dead themselves now as the original will was made donkey’s years ago. There are younger generation distant family members. They obviously they were not around when the original will was made. Hopefully the bequests will filter down to them. Anyway for myself I would spend the lot! Love the Hermes scarves idea!

Rinatinabina · 01/07/2022 10:44

Womens rape and domestic violence services, probably southall black sisters and pause.

Rinatinabina · 01/07/2022 10:47

www.pause.org.uk/independent-department-for-education-evaluation/

I think they do an amazing job for women and children.

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