To message the other woman?

[inhellyesterday]

I've been in a long distance relationship with my boyfriend for just over a year now. I'm 25 and he is 22, we see each other about twice a month and have been on a few holidays together. However, he told me last night that he has been cheating on me with a 30 year old woman from him work, I suppose that's the only decent thing he has done was telling me but I knew something was up. He was becoming very distant etc. He doesn't want to continue our relationship but claims the relationship with this woman is 'purely sexual' and he doesn't want a relationship with her. But I wouldn't be surprised if they were to become an item.

I'm heartbroken and beyond furious. I know my anger should be at him but she is 30 and a mother, she knew about me and also likes almost all of our pictures on social media of me and him together whilst she was shagging him. What is all that about? Also what does a 30 year old mother want with a 22 year old boy? WIBU to message her telling her exactly what I think of her and then just block them both? He's heard what I have to say.

Kindness and confidence are HUGELY attractive.

I agree with your message, but to be fair, I don't think the other woman in this case has shown either of these qualities herself. It's pretty normal to be pissed off at both parties, and pretty easy to tell someone not to care about the other woman when you're not in the situation.

How someone reacts internally to being cheated on isn't a fair representation of their character, it's a pretty upsetting situation. She hasn't actually said it to the woman that's she's less or unattractive. I really couldnt get worked up even if she did.

She hasn't actually said it to the woman that's she's less or unattractive. I really couldnt get worked up even if she did.

Well even if she did, OW has an obvious slam dunk response so it really isn't worth it.

Guy is a complete tool. An attractive 25 year old shouldn't have any trouble upgrading.

Kindness and confidence are HUGELY attractive.

Who cares? Its not a competition to attract the cheat. Women should feel able to vent about cheats without it being insinuated that they are lacking kindness or confidence.

Oh dear I had lots of sympathy but then. 🤔.
To be fair he is a shit but for all you know he's told her your just fwb. No one knows and it's not worth finding out.
Keep your self respect and dignity, work on your self esteem and beliefs about what makes someone attractive and no more nit picking other females because they're older or mothers.
Fyi I'm in my 40's and still get (unwanted) attention from men the same age as my kids. Nothing wrong with it, it's just not for everyone.

Christ - stop going on about her age and how much more attractive you are. It’s not a good look. You’re hurt - I get it. Hard as it is - he has chosen to be with someone else, not you. Maybe he’s into older women - nothing f wrong with that too. I hope you can move on. Onwards and upwards as they say.

@collosalbrainbearer I HAVE been in the situation my marriage ended due to ex cheating with a supposed friend and much younger ow so I do know how shit it feels.

I'm not telling op not to care or even not to blame ow

kindness and confidence are HUGELY attractive

was more in the way of advice to op to develop those traits themselves and not to rely solely on looks

@AchatAVendre and I wasn't meaning in order to attract the ex back