Is it U to ask the local Chinese Takeaway for "tick"

[cheekyornot]

Local Chinese we've used for years (take away once every 2-3 months)
They recognise us when we go in and have our details on file (when we phone up they know it's us on their system)
They only take cash and have no card payments either in shop or over phone.
Dh stopped in tonight from work to pick up our takeaway that I'd phoned in earlier. Once he got there and went to the cash point next door and realised he had forgot his bank card and only had his credit card so would need to come home first to get a card.
I told him to pop in and ask if he could take the food and we'd drop off the money tomorrow. Obviously if they said no there would be no problem but considering they "know" us I couldn't see the harm in asking.
Dh, who is quite socially awkward, goes in a strop saying that's ridiculous and no way would they agree, you wouldn't try that at Tesco etc?
I agree you wouldn't do it at Tesco/McDonald's but feel this is different and think they would rather give regular customers hot food rather than them coming in half an hour later to pick up cold food?
In the end he withdrew money from his credit card which I think was stupid rather than asking them first if we could pop in tomorrow
I know this is boring first world problems but would you have asked in this case?

YABU

• They don't "know" you at all. You're an infrequent customer - the fact they're friendly to you is because it's part of their business to do that, not because you're actually friends with them.


• Even asking puts them in a really awkward position - they can't give an answer that doesn't screw them somehow. Either they agree, take the risk and also have to now offer this option to everyone else or risk being slated or, they say no and risk you refusing to take and pay for the food you ordered (and they've already made) and offending you so losing business (and/or giving them a bad review).


• You've acknowledged you wouldn't do this or expect this from larger businesses so you seem to think that smaller businesses (who are struggling the most) should take greater risks to accommodate you. It's equivalent to thinking people on a low income should share with you but high earners shouldn't... it's completely illogical.


• You've insulted your DH as "socially awkward" and "stupid" when, in fact, he has better social awareness that you do.

I run a business with one of these systems, and not a big business either! Boggles my mind why people are still demanding cash only (apart from the HMRC thing)

No way I'd do that

Exactly; it’s different if you genuinely realise while you’re standing ready to pay that you’ve left your card or whatever, and they spontaneously offer some compromise. Because it’s coming from them.

People not recognising the difference between that scenario and one where you go in with a story and ask them to trust you, putting them in an awkward position, is where the entitlement/cheek/rudeness comes in.

A takeaway once every 2-3 months is not a regular, well known customer! Your husband should have come home, got the money then went back - might be longer and out of his way, but that’s the only option in my eyes. You were suggesting cheeky fuckery at its best 🙄

One of the ‘best in the UK’ fish and chip shops was cash only I went into last week, walked right out

Was it Binley Mega Chippie? 😁

If as stated you are very regulars, and they know you both, then it's always worth trying.

@SusieSimpleman no it wasn’t unfortunately, I swear there are 1000s that claim it 🤣 Fair enough having a min order spend on card, but Cash only no matter what? fraud, fraud, fraud.

Um no, of course not, how cringe, you are grown ups you get the money and pay at the point of service. Your issues are yours, not the takeaways.

and what’s even more cringe is you don’t want to tell your husband you were wrong.

How embarrassing 😳

I would have made a card payment over the phone so your husband could have taken the paid for food home 🤷🏼‍♀️

It is not illegal to want to be be paid in cash. It doesn't mean someone is dodging tax. If you think they are you have the right to refuse to buy off them.

I think taking money out on his credit card was a perfectly sensible way round it. Another would have been popping in, saying you've forgotten your card and are they ok to keep the food warm for half an hour? They have an opportunity to offer a tab, though I suspect you are not a regular enough customer and they'd just say no problem, see you soon.

Just not turning up after you've ordered would be far worse.

I’m with your Dh. I wouldn’t ask. I would say that I’ve forgotten my card and will be back. If they offer to take payment tomorrow that’s different.

I wouldn't ask it, myself. You have a business relationship, not a personal one, and their business is not loans, which is, essentially, what this is, albeit a very short-term one. And I promise you, if ANYONE in the store heard them agree to it, they would be getting requests all day, every day, and half of those people would not pay them back.

I think takeaways, it seems mostly takeaways that is insist on cash only, should also offer other payment methods.
I don't really have them that much, but it's an annoyance having to withdraw cash if you fancy a bag of chips.
It makes me wonder if they are paying the correct taxes on all those cash takings.

You're barely a regular if you only go every 2-3 months
Im with everyone else id be mortified to ask the question

Absolutely not okay to ask this. It was so awkward and embarrassing when I've been asked this by customers in the past when working in shops.

I run a similar business. I'd do this for a minority of customers - the ones who are so regular that I literally know where they live and where their kids go to school, or who I can rely upon to see them again within the next week.

For the vast majority of customers, no chance.

I remember one individual (I couldn't call them a customer) who tried to tag team with her child on scamming me and my next door neighbour. Did the "my card just got declined I'll come back tomorrow" routine with my neighbour while downing a can of coke in front of him (neighbour told her she could have the food when she returned with cash).

Meanwhile the child was at my business claiming they'd found a hair in their food a full seven days ago (!!) and wanted a refund. I popped next door to speak to mum. Asked her to tell me her entire order. I checked our records; no one had ordered that combo on that day, and a quick bit of conferring with my NDN confirmed it was all a scam.

There are customers and there are "customers" but as a rule if you wouldn't ask Tesco for it and you aren't so familiar with the business owner that you will have a good chat when you go in and know their kids / dogs / husbands name then YABU to ask.

You might think they know you because you are regulars but actually most of their customers are regulars. DS worked in a Chinese takeaway when he was at school. He reckoned 99% of the people who rang ordered the same food every week. He got so he knew their orders before they read them out😂.
Not a chance in hell they would give credit though.

Exactly this.

No way can you do this, when you place an order you are committing to buy and they will have already incurred costs by the time you come to collect.

Some people would not bother going back, and they cannot remember all the regular customers.

I probs wouldn't ask this because I'm also socially awkward and shy and would be really embarrassed if they said no and would never be able to go in there again, BUT....

I think given the context you weren't unreasonable to think of asking.
You're a regular customer, they know you use them quite often and always have the money to pay, you obviously like their takeaway because you keep going back, so if you were to take the food and never pay you wouldn't ever be able to go there again, so would have lost a good takeaway place. I think it would be good customer service from them if they were to weigh all of that up and decide that its highly unlikely you'll fail to pay, and even if you did they could just ban you and they've only lost a meal. The most likely outcome is that you do come back and pay, and continue to use them, and they have delivered you good customer service so you're likely to use them even more, recommend to others, leave them a tip etc.

Tesco/Mcdonalds is different to a local takeaway. If Tesco allowed someone to walk away with goods without paying it would be all over the internet and everyone would try it. I doubt people will travel from miles around to visit the Chinese takeaway that let's you take food home if you 'forget' your card. Also they're independent so it's at their discretion to decide who they want to do favours for i.e regular, loyal customers.

Also if someone was allowed to do this at Tesco, they could easily not come back to pay and just keep going to different Tesco stores doing the same thing. In this context the OP would lose a favoured takeaway place if she were to not pay, and I think its reasonable for OP to think the owner of the takeaway would conclude that its unlikely she'll not sacrifice her regular takeaway just for one free meal. So, bit silly to compare the situation to a Tesco or Mcdonalds.

Of course, the Chinese takeaway owner would not be unreasonable to refuse your request, but I don't think you were unreasonable to ask. If you don't ask you don't get and all that.

I sympathise with your DH though as I personally I wouldn't have wanted to ask them either and would have used credit card, or picked up cold food and reheated it. He's unreasonable for going into a 'strop' though. and the comparison to Tesco doesn't hold up for me.

Not a big deal though - I don't think there's a right or wrong as far as wanting to ask goes. Its just differing personalities/opinions. Agree to disagree. And tell him to remember his card next time!

I'd have asked about alternatives first such as bank transfer, and tbh if there was a way to get cash, such as in my credit card, I'd have done that first. I'd have only asked to pay later if I'd already ordered and then discovered I had no way of paying at all.

We have done it twice at our local pub - once when Dh left his wallet at home and the second when his card wouldn't read on their machine. Neither time I had my bag and both were pre phone bank all or being able to use our phones to pay as they were a bit slow in taking up contactless payment. No cash point in walking distance. BUT we know the landlady really well, go regularly and they know us well enough to know we'd definitely pay - FB friends, Dh has done business work with her, has our phone number, etc. we paid the next morning.