Employee stealing from a food bank

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NC'd for this. I run a food bank. I have a (paid) assistant Mary, along with lots of volunteers. My assistant used to be a volunteer, for context, but this is now her first proper job. She's on the autistic spectrum but very high-functioning. She is due to leave at the end of this month (travel, then uni). She's 19.

Anyway - I'm pretty sure she's stealing stock. Not donations from the public, but corporate type donations - bulk packs of biscuits, crisps etc. Always treat-y things rather than the (many) more mundane foods we have. Eg we receive two boxes of Dairy Milk at 2pm on Monday, I see them on the shelf, I head off at 3.30 and leave Mary there to finish whatever task - and when I come back in at 7 the next morning, one of the boxes is open and two large bars are missing. That sort of thing, again and again. On some of these occasions other people are in too, but the common denominator is Mary (and she'd always be the one in last/locking up). It's also extended to leaving the wrappers lying around on occasion, which is both dumb and infuriating.

Lives at home in a very well-off house, no expenses/money issues, no shortage of food - I'm quite certain. It feels, instinctively, like "teenage bottomless pit" type behaviour.

So:
Catch her out definitively?
Give her a vague but pointed chat about our stock and what it's for?
Say something before I wave her off at the end of the month?
Ignore?
Some other thing?

I don't think the value of what she's stealing is any great shakes, but a) really, who the hell steals from a food bank? b) theft is theft c) I trained her up and gave her a brilliant opportunity with this job, so I find it quite hurtful. I also would rather she learn her lesson now rather than when she's, I dunno, Chancellor of the Exchequer.

I don't have any other managers etc to bounce this off. I have trustees, who I suspect will leave it with me to make a decision as I see fit. WWYD?

Apologies. I really don't mean to get at people who are autistic or not. I do not dislike nor do I dismiss the needs of autistic people. In fact if you read all my posts, I've tried to be quite balanced.

I'm bowing out of this thread but you have no idea about my views and I certainly do not discriminate against autistic people nor NT people for that matter.

I hope OP gets this sorted out as it is a hard situation for her to be put in.

Acas have guidelines on how to treat employees who steal. Autism doesn’t feature in them.

Catching and correcting this ass’t is doing her a favour. It usually escalates.

I’d be hurt and shocked too. Nothing about autism makes you a thief.

pixie5121 - other people behave differently to each other, including to you.

Understanding that is called theory of mind, a skill most people acquire about aged 2.

Your posts are an elegant example of someone who unlike most NT and ND people, doesn’t grasp it. That lack of comprehension is still a key diagnostic of ASD.

You won’t understand this, but your rage and perseverating because other peoples choices and behaviours are different to
yours are just the ASD rolling itself out.

It might be Mary. It might not be. Call a whole staff meeting and tell them all that food is for the clients.

This.

I have a DS, DD and a DH who are diagnosed with ASD.
I live with this 24/7

I don't disagree with any of that, it is very annoying and can be very damaging as well. Or even when something is said at the time, but they then store it up and trot it out again at appraisal time. However, that's more to do with performance, rather than stealing from your employer.

{mention: pixie5121} take a chill pill. And that's coming from an autistic person with three autistic children.
I absolutely agree with what @Supersimkin2 said.

This is really interesting as you'd expect Acas to feature autism in their guidelines re employees who steal.

Agreed that this can escalate if not dealt with.

As I said before, it's a very tricky position for OP to be put in and I'm sure she doesn't relish handling this.

Just so I don’t leave people hanging here, after so many gave advice.

It definitely was Mary stealing - on two occasions since I posted I made a careful record of our treat shelf immediately before leaving, left Mary there alone and then came back in to take a record immediately after she left. I spot-checked others left alone - nothing missing.

When I went in to speak to her (on a day when I usually wouldn’t be in) she was - as she’d previously been warned against explicitly - playing on her phone rather than doing the tasks set, which strengthened my resolve. I asked her if she knew anything about the biscuits in the storeroom and it all came out. I then asked her about previous weeks and at that point she started backtracking but in a way that wasn’t making much sense (ie so-and-so said she could even though that person wasn’t in and generally wouldn’t have an opinion).

I told her not to see out the rest of the month (two days really) as she was supposed to, and sent her off.

I suspect I’ll be in for some abuse from some quarters now but there we are.

Autism doesn’t feature because Acas deal with the real world, where disability doesn’t mean you get to break the law.

No matter how much MN disagrees.

Agree with not roping the others in to the blame game - all your trust with them built up over time gone in one instance. Tackle her head on instead

Ooops - didn't see update - sorry!

Sorry op you e handled this so badly. Basically a disciplinary meeting for gross conduct with no warning and fired a disabled employee on the spot. You don't appear to have a record of previous warnings and you don't have written policies.

But as it's a charity, with no employee manual etc then what comes into place here?

It's very unclear as to what OP is supposed to do.

Having said that close friend was my manager and had 2 disabled workers (one with a managed health condition and the other with a similar condition but not present).

One of the workers kept on using his personal phone in work time (a lot) and she just spoke to him firmly to remind him not to use it a lot during work time etc. There were some other teething issues but she spoke firmly but kindly to them.

It was a diocese though (not a charity I think?) with presumably an employment manual but also with a HR person. Not that great the HR person apparently but...

Charities are vehicles - they can be limited companies etc. They should be run well especially if employing someone.

@OneFrenchEgg - you're saying they can be limited companies but obviously not all are. And also you're saying that they should be run well but obviously they are not all run well either.

I also to work for a small solicitors (not a solicitor myself) but we used to have to draw up employee handbooks, T&C etc and various other legal/HR based documents for small companies. A guide as it were but the companies had to abide by them, especially if they were new small companies, or growing companies. Many of these companies outsourced their HR as it's cheaper not to employ a specific HR employee. The diocese I knew of only had a part time HR employee. I am actually quite shocked (but not altogether surprised) that so many charities are not run well it seems and it seems the rules don't seem to apply to them as stringently as it they would to a non charitable company. But it doesn't altogether surprise me either.

And as I said before, I think OP has been put in a really tricky position, what's she supposed to do it seems, just exercise her own judgment, even the Trustees of the food back (charity) appear to have backed away from this incident and left her to it and hopefully there'll be no legal recourse on her personally. OP it seems has got someone in her first job (after being an employee) who's not worked before, so may not know the nuances of first time work rules. In the olden days when there was far HR legislation then you'd do as OP has done, speak to your employees about things they shouldn't do (on mobile phones, but they were bricks back then!) or steal etc (but I know most companies clamped down on stealing e.g. money if they knew who'd done it). But now there's much more HR/employer/employee legislation (there always were unions) and add the charity status into the mix and no wonder OP feels she has to act as she did. There also wasn't the awareness (talking early 90s) of autism etc so if OP is suddenly presented with this sort of case and doesn't know what to do/how to handle it then of course she acts as she does. It doesn't mean she's right however. It all sounds a bit messy all round to be honest in this case.

I honestly can't make sense of what you are saying.
People shouldn't expect employment rights or procedures if the organisation they work for is run badly?
Op runs the thing - a bit of research into basics would have helped it's not rocket science and there is a lot of free resource out there for small charities.

OP, after your update, I hope you have made good records and provided notification to Mary of your findings / actions.

It is not clear if you dismissed her for gross misconduct, or if you sent her home on gardening leave for the remainder of her contract (i.e. the 2 days) and will be paying her for those days.

I think you should seek some HR advice ASAP - there are lots of external HR professionals who can provide advice.

If you haven't already, ensure you make a good record of your observations and of your conversation with Mary. Seek professional advice, and then write to Mary providing clarity on if she was dismissed / placed on gardening leave, why, and what this means in terms of a reference. On that note, be very very careful about references. Most places only now provide a factual statement as to role and dates worked.

TBH, charity or not, you seem to be a bit naive about your responsibilities as an employer and manager. If you don't already, ensure you draw up a handbook and I suggest doing some CPD around managing conduct / performance issues.

I don’t think you were wrong to ask her or let her go, but I think you’ve handled that very poorly. You should have been much more professional and kind in your approach. I hope you were nicer in person than you’ve made out on here.

And let's hope that Mary's parents don't start asking questions about fair procedures.

Glad you handled it head on, OP. Your donors and other staff deserve that sort of robust management. Well done for not ducking out of it.

I agree, though, that you need to read up on the legal side of this and make sure you comply with your obligations as an employer - your donors, staff and Mary deserve that too. And doing so will put you in a better position should you meet similar challenges in the future.

Why does op need to be kind. She was a thief and a liar too as she tried to cover it up and get others blamed. Why should she receive any special treatment just because of her autism?

It’s called empathy to other humans. The kid is 19 it’s her first proper job, she’s got autism which obviously affects her judgement sometimes and whilst she should have been fired I agree, it does not mean that OP, a fully grown adult with a responsibility to her employees should destroy this girls confidence by being horrible in the way she lets her go. It’s not necessary and it’s unethical.

She doesn't have to "be kind" but she does have to act within the law. And people with disabilities do get "special treatment " in the sense that the law protects them from the discrimination they would otherwise face. Not sure how many of the OP'S donors would support the way she has handled this, personally I like good, clear people management policies in the charities I support.