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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To wonder how people afford holidays!

406 replies

Dreaming34 · 21/06/2022 15:22

I mustn’t be budgeting very well on food etc and me and my DH have a joint income of 75k, we really struggle at the end of every month and we cannot afford to go on holiday! Everything is so expensive really we are really struggling

OP posts:
FruitToast · 21/06/2022 18:09

Also live in the NW, earn slightly less between the 2 of us, one DC in nursery and one in full time wrap around care at school and have got 3 holidays booked this year (although one carried was meant to be last year). I suspect you are spending money you don't need to!

Allthegoodusernamesareused · 21/06/2022 18:10

We live in the south east (not London but a commuter town) and have a combined income of around £50k. We have a mortgage, just the one car, a couple of kids and a cat.
We manage to have a holiday most years, but it's a week in Norfolk/Dorset/Devon most years. We go abroad maybe every 3rd or 4th year. We achieve that by saving a bit each month, and by sacrificing the little day to day luxuries (we never have takeaways, rarely eat out, don't get coffee out. Ever).

My kids do some activities but thankfully nothing as expensive as gymnastics! We don't buy branded clothes or tech, preferring to save our money for experiences rather than material things iyswim?

If you're still paying nursery fees then it will be tight, hopefully in a year or two it'll get easier.

pixie5121 · 21/06/2022 18:10

They prioritise them.

Sometimes this means extreme sacrifice. I would literally eat beans on toast every day for weeks if it meant being able to go on holiday. I have also decided I probably won't have children, because unless I happen to meet a very rich partner, I don't think I can maintain even a reasonable quality of life and have kids.

pixie5121 · 21/06/2022 18:13

Oblomov22 · 21/06/2022 17:58

Natal : "Are either you or your partner able to find better jobs on more pay?"

Eh? New job? £75k household income is very good. Should be able to afford a holiday. Like Begonia, you don't need to spend a fortune on a holiday. At Easter we went a week AI to Majorca for £1250 for a family of 4.

Good where?

It's a below average income for a household in London, AFAIK, and I'd very much struggle to raise kids on that, eat well, live a reasonably nice lifestyle AND go on holiday.

Quitelikeit · 21/06/2022 18:13

coffeecupsandfairylights · 21/06/2022 17:50

But all of this:

1 Squeezed Orange (51%), A slice of Pressed Pineapple (26%), 1/3 of a Mashed Banana**, A chunk of Crushed Mango (1.8%), Some Crushed Peach,

IS fruit purée. Purée is just squashed/blended fruit, it doesn't have anything nasty added to it.

There's nothing different in the Tesco one, they just use the word purée instead of saying everything has been squeezed, pressed, mashed and crushed 😂

There are differences but I am not going to explain them to you as you clearly cannot grasp the difference in quality of different items and how quality can be measured or determined!!!!!

zzzzz

’all smoothies are equal’

CharSiu · 21/06/2022 18:13

You could afford a holiday if you just paid for essentials.

You are not actually poor you are distributing your income in a way that isn’t conducive to saving for larger items like a holiday.

FemmeNatal · 21/06/2022 18:15

Lochjeda · 21/06/2022 18:08

Its just not true that making fruit in to smoothies alters the fiber 🤣 did you all do weight watchers or something who use to tell people eating a banana was less "points" than mashing it then eating it. The only way fiber is removed when making a smoothie is if you remove the skin which contains fiber in certain fruits.

No, that's not right. If you rip open the cells then instead of the whole volume of the cell contributing to the fibre (as you can't digest it), now only the cell wall itself is.

Artwodeetoo · 21/06/2022 18:15

People prioritise different things. For some a holiday is important and so they plan to save and perhaps forgo/cut back on other things. On a joint income of £70k plus I'm sure there's some give in the budget somewhere if you are that fussed about saving.

nalabae · 21/06/2022 18:16

Credit.
don’t be jealous of others.

DockOTheBay · 21/06/2022 18:17

Nutritional info for Innocent Smoothie and Asda Smoothie (same flavour). There are some very small differences, but broadly the same (fibre the same for example, vitamin C, sugar and protein Asda has slightly more)

To wonder how people afford holidays!
FemmeNatal · 21/06/2022 18:17

pixie5121 · 21/06/2022 18:13

Good where?

It's a below average income for a household in London, AFAIK, and I'd very much struggle to raise kids on that, eat well, live a reasonably nice lifestyle AND go on holiday.

No, average in London is around £45,000 per household.

data.london.gov.uk/dataset/focus-on-london-income-and-spending

Sallypally0 · 21/06/2022 18:19

Based on your posts I doubt very much that you are very strict with any kind of budgeting. Perhaps try and budget and you might be able to afford a holiday. Hint this includes reducing spending in some areas.

DaisyRain543 · 21/06/2022 18:19

Myself and my partner manage fine on about 3,200pm jointly after tax but we don't have kids and we live in the North west. Our rent is pretty low at the moment but we are looking to move. We don't have fancy holidays though as we have been saving for a mortgage. We've been going to a cottage for a week once or twice a year which is pretty reasonably priced. It's nothing fancy at all it's just for a little break.

MarvelMrs · 21/06/2022 18:20

We live in the suburbs in SE London. We live ok, very tight but ok on a combined income of £33K plus standard child benefit. 3 kids. One car.
I am baffled as to how you can’t afford a holiday. I think I would be going through my outgoings with a fine comb and making saving for a holiday a priority. Ice creams, coffees, general stuff can go on the back burner for a while to save.

Onthegrid · 21/06/2022 18:21

You have a take home of somewhere between £4000 & £5000, unless you have some serious debit you are servicing you must be wasting far more than a few ice creams and some smoothies.
Analyse what you spend, make a spreadsheet, work to a budget, then you will find the money to go on holiday, it is easily within your grasp.

CandyLeBonBon · 21/06/2022 18:23

Lochjeda · 21/06/2022 18:08

Its just not true that making fruit in to smoothies alters the fiber 🤣 did you all do weight watchers or something who use to tell people eating a banana was less "points" than mashing it then eating it. The only way fiber is removed when making a smoothie is if you remove the skin which contains fiber in certain fruits.

You know that commercial smoothies are strained right? Which is why I differentiated between commercial smoothies and home made smoothies.

user75 · 21/06/2022 18:27

I have a holiday to the Caribbean every year and earn half what you did. It is my priority. The amount you spend on activities and days out is extraordinary to me!

StickyFingeredWeeNed · 21/06/2022 18:28

I earn a third of your income and we’re going 2 weeks AI next year. I’m paying monthly.

We’re also talking about buying a boat this summer.

In addition to this, my kids sometimes have an innocent smoothie (I think they’re junk… but whatevs). They get that smoothie as part of a Tesco lunch meal deal which we’ll have on a day out rather than dropping £50 on a nice cafe for lunch.

I can’t imagine where all your cash is going tbh.

user375242 · 21/06/2022 18:29

Our joint income is about 60k and we live in a very cheap area up north, have one second hand car, buy very cheap food, the children all do free or very cheap activities (Brownies is the most expensive) and we are skint and in overdraft each month. But my partner is in the higher income tax bracket and I earn very little due to his shifts and lack of childcare. So it sounds like a lot to some people but friends who are on a joint income of much less are better off than us and can claim things like free prescriptions (we both have more than two prescriptions a month so it adds up).

We do have a few short UK breaks and go camping, and have had some great holidays that way, but I'd love to go abroad. I never used to understand how those classed as a higher earner could claim to be skint, but honestly, we had more disposable income when our income was low enough for us to recieve child tax credits. That was the last time we could afford a holiday abroad.

addictedtotheflats · 21/06/2022 18:36

We earn 10K less as a household and dont feel like we cant afford things. We save £700 a month and after bills and food i have £800 disposable and my DP around £400. My mortgage is £340 and we could do with a bigger house but tbh id rather be able to afford what I want rather than have a massive mortgage.

addictedtotheflats · 21/06/2022 18:36

We have 1 child

user375242 · 21/06/2022 18:37

Perplexed0522 · 21/06/2022 18:02

It depends how you go about it…

For example my husband is going away with our two children in Summer, they are going to Egypt for 16 nights, All Inclusive and it’s cost about £1300.

In May, they all went to Egypt for 7 nights, All Inclusive again and it cost £700.

How?? I browse holidays I can't afford all the time. I have tried pricing up separate flights and accom and deals and have never seen anything like this. I suppose the price might double if you were going too?

smallbeetle · 21/06/2022 18:41

Are you kids in private nursery? Those costs won't last.

But otherwise you have a very good income and you just need to budget. Our joint income is the same as yours and we do have a holiday each year we do have savings, even though our mortgage each month is huge (1k per month).

Teateaandmoretea · 21/06/2022 18:42

It’s because we don’t have a mortgage and nursery fees as our kids are older.

The thing is OP, they just have more money/ fewer outgoings it’s how it is.

WombatChocolate · 21/06/2022 18:50

I’d say people with the same household income can have wildly varying standards of living due to how money savvy they are…..and that’s not due to age which determines the price they bought property at.

So for example, some people on £75k have over the years built up a pot of savings. They have £10-£15k they can draw on when needed. This means that when bigger expenditures appear they can buy a 3 year old car, or a new boiler outright and without any credit agreement. Therefore they don’t have hundreds going out monthly in payment plans and eating into what’s available for basic living or holidays. Some people on £75k will manage the weekly shop for their family for £60 and others will spend more than double that…with exactly the same number of people in the house. Some will have 4 TV subscription packages and others just 1. Some eat a takeaway every week whereas others might have it once every 6 months. Some check their utilities and insurance every year and switch and others don’t, meaning they might pay £500 or more on those things.

The impact of these different things all factored in together can make a huge difference. It can mean one family of 4 with kids the same age can manage 2 holidays a year and the others can’t have any. It can mean one family can upgrade to a bigger house and will retire 5 years earlier than the other.

Money savvy means no spending more than you need to on things. It doesn’t mean being cheap or going without, just that you get more value from your money. So ultimately the person who watches the pennies has more £ to spend.

I know families who have the same income as other families and the adults nad kids are similar ages and neither have had family help. They started from the same position. One have regular monthly payments going out for 2 cars which they replace every 2 years. They also eat takeaways weekly and spend a lot in the supermarket and keep their heating on high through the day and night in winter. They have also borrowed in the past for an extension and to do up their bathroom. They don’t have holidays as they are ‘skint’ even though they have more than £100k coming in. The other family has a similar income and lives in a slightly smaller house. They drive cars which are about 7 years old and monitor their bills and weekly spending. They eat out with friends but don’t have takeaways and only tend to eat out once a month. But they always have 3 holidays a year, including a big one and they manage to send one of their kids to a private school. They also have good pension provision and are looking at stopping at work just before 60.

These little focuses on money accumulate in impact and over the years mean some families live hand to mouth and others have flexibility and choices available to them. Often they don’t have so much of the immediate items which people might fritter on, but actually have more of the big stuff and importantly have spare cash so that when something crops up that they’d like or need, they can just choose it, without serious consideration of affordability. So they might get the letter about the school ski trip at £1.2k and look at it and say ‘yes’ because the savings are there, whereas the other family has no savings and knows that each month every penny goes.

Lots of people see money savvy and being a bit frugal as dull, boring and meaning people go without. Often it means they get far more because they know that always buying brands in the shop, when you can get similar or identical for 1/3 less, and always paying a lease for a brand new car fritter away hundreds each month which could be put to better use. It’s fine if you’d rather have the branded food and a new car every two years if you accept that then you can’t have the holidays or early retirement, or upgrade to a bigger house, but actually you can’t have everything and choices always have to be made….and they impacts that somehow people often can’t seem to see.