To wonder how people afford holidays!

[Dreaming34]

I mustn’t be budgeting very well on food etc and me and my DH have a joint income of 75k, we really struggle at the end of every month and we cannot afford to go on holiday! Everything is so expensive really we are really struggling

Not sure why there are so many unkind comments on this. We have an income roughly 3x of OP’s. We don’t see ourselves as having much and we still budget for things and don’t splash out on unnecessary things. We happily shop at Aldi and many of Tesco’s own brands. ALDI’s food and baby range are really good quality and their skincare products are such good value- I honestly see no difference between Lacura and many top brands that I used in the past, and some are even better. We also shop at Waitrose a lot but mostly their own brands stuff as very good quality. I use comparison websites for deals/cashback. We cancel TV sports subscription as soon as football season finishes. We plan for holidays in advance and maximise miles and hotel points to stay, compare FX deals offered by different cards, saving rates & offers with various banks. We pay £6 each month for SIM only mobile. I think there are lots of things that we can afford spending more on but I just don’t see the needs. I’d rather spend it on holidays and weekend breaks that would create fond memories with family.
I don’t think what OP prioritised in the past was anything wrong, like nice quality food. But I think over the years my life priority has changed especially after having a baby and becoming more health& nutrition conscious and getting better at housekeeping. I would not spend much on designer bags or clothes anymore, and instead I’d spend on nursery fees (also 3x of OP’s being in London) and cleaners to free up my time and energy to have quality time with family.
I would suggest OP to figure out what really makes you happy and satisfied, then prioritise that over the others. For some it’s perfect to have good quality food and lifestyle in the 350 days of the year and not to splash out on the 15 day holidays of the year, but it may work the other way around for the others, depending what makes you happy.

Not sure why there are so many unkind comments on this. We have an income roughly 3x of OP’s. We don’t see ourselves as having much

£225,000 income and you don't have much 🤣😂🤣😅🤣

Please take a reality check

^ this..
Nearly all my spending is on a credit card…. even if I’m just buying an ice cream in the park…. BUT it’s is always paid off in full each month and I get a large amount of cash back regularly. Our last cash back bonus paid for the new mobile we bought our DS for his birthday.

Not sure why there are so many unkind comments on this. We have an income roughly 3x of OP’s. We don’t see ourselves as having much

😂😂

You poor people only earning a quarter of a million a year!

Not sure why there are so many unkind comments on this. We have an income roughly 3x of OP’s. We don’t see ourselves as having much

Surely you arent that out of touch?

Not sure why there are so many unkind comments on this.

Because she has a very good household income, chooses to have high outgoings and has little awareness of where she can very easily make savings.

It's crass at the best of times, but right now a lot of people are finding the 'woe is me' from people who can (with some adjustments) accommodate the increase in living quite distasteful.

What was the point of you saying you earn £225,000 but you don't have much?
It might be true that you don't have much, but maybe before posting, have a look around you and read the news and consider that the reason you don't have much is down to your choices, NOT the increase in holiday prices.

Sadly it’s quite clear that this thread is just about moaning and winning the competition of who is hit the most in inflations, instead of sharing ideas and perspectives to help OP to achieve what she wanted.

Sorry but I have to agree with this. There are people struggling to put food on the table for their children, everything is relative of course and people who earn more may have more outgoings but for people who really are struggling, some of the comments about struggling on 70/100+k a year would be a kick in the teeth.

The best thing to post here would be tips that anyone can use to save money, but unfortunately that comes with sacrifice usually and if people aren't willing to do that then it's a dead end.

Not only that but you get additional protection buying things using a credit card. As long as you can trust yourself to be sensible with it, it makes complete financial sense to pay for everything with one

Typical MN response should be: oh, you don't know what their mortgage is, maybe they're in debt or they live in London which would bring them to the edge of poverty with this kind of money.

I think another thing to mention is that quite often you have a lifestyle going on that is there because it's what one adult person in a relationship wants and dictates, rather then being on the same page (obviously not applicable if single parents) . So you end up with the 2 newish cars or a house that's beyond your means or a house full of up to the minute gadgets or designer clothes, rather than good food or affordable breaks- because one persons personality and agenda dominates and the other person has lost the will to 'speak up' I know quite a few relationships like this - several involve pretty materialistic men and one involves a woman who spends a fortune on herself and kids.

This is quite right. I’ve seen families like this as well.

Well doesn't that just take the Waitrose biscuit.

I'm sure it's also a kick in the teeth for people who have chosen not to have kids because they can't afford them to be branded 'lucky' by those who had them on much lower incomes.

It certainly gets on my nerves when people are bitter about other people's salaries and don't factor in their life choices.

@pixie5121

I don't really know what your talking about?
I've known people who have been on a lot more money than OP, and circumstances change. So I think it's a bit naive of you to begrudge someone for having children on a "low salary".

And I don't know if anyone is bitter about the salary of the poster. I think people are trying to explain that it's a bit ridiculous for someone to be complaining about not being able to afford a holiday when they don't want to cut down on luxuries.

Fact of the matter is, people ARE struggling and some of them it isn't their fault they are in that situation. I think you'd be a very pathetic person to assume that everyone chooses to be in hardship. Not only that, plenty of people had children and were doing just fine until the economy fucked up, covid, people lost jobs or got into debt.

I just think you need to check your attitude, your obviously a grown adult. Think outside of your little bubble for once.

@pixie5121 and like I said in my post, everything is relative. There are going to be people on higher incomes who are struggling, SO many people are struggling to adjust to the way life has changed in the past few years. Being a nice person wouldn't go a miss. And it's free!

I wasn't begrudging people having children on a low salary.

I just don't like when people mock other people's struggles, or tell people who make more money that they're lucky/clueless/minted. Everyone's life is different and everyone's priorities are different.

I chose not to go ahead and have children when in a LTR because I didn't feel financially stable and I didn't want to inflict poverty on them. That's why I'm not struggling now. I made a sacrifice...and let's be honest, it's a huge sacrifice...to try to make sure I could get on my feet financially. I think some of the people who are bitter about others having more money forget that those people have made sacrifices they haven't made themselves. Mandy with four kids on half my salary is poorer than me, yes, but she has four kids. I might never have any now. I've spent most of my thirties retraining and rebuilding a career and starting a business to the detriment of my love life. Mandy made her choice and I made mine.

A lot of the answer to 'how can I afford to go on holiday?' is 'don't have kids', but many people would find that unreasonable. Is it unreasonable? You can't have everything.

I didn't say anyone chose to be in hardship....WTF...that is pure projection.

@pixie5121 that's fair enough. I think waiting to have children until your financially stable is a very selfless thing to do. I agree that people who are on higher incomes aren't lucky, they have obviously worked hard for it, but it also means they have a luxury of more money. They could downsize a house or cut down on luxuries, whereas someone who is already in a small house on a small salary couldn't do that so they are mostly in a better position.

What people don't think though is that Mandy with 4 children might have been on 100k a few years ago and situations changed, she might have been in a marriage with a well paid man and then got divorced. Lots of people who are struggling with children didn't choose to struggle that's what I'm saying. And I think it's just pigheaded to think that oh well that's her choice. I had a well paid job with great perks before covid and I got made redundant. Luckily my partner earns enough for us both and our children. But it was really upsetting to be put into that situation.

And kids don't need designer clothes or £20 ice creams to be happy. Lots of people with children on a normal wage afford holidays and their children have everything they need and more

Yep, I totally understand that circumstances can change, but that's something you have to account for when you have children. I feel really uncomfortable thinking about how stressed I'd be if I lost my job and had kids depending on me, so it's a major factor in why I probably won't be having them. Just worrying about myself is a lot less pressure.

I've had a few digs from people IRL about how many holidays I take, and I just think, well, if you'd sacrificed like I did, you'd also be able to go on them. That's fair to say, isn't it? They earn a similar amount to me. They need to rent a 2/3-bed flat or house - they can't rent a studio or house share. They need to pay for uniforms, activities, clothes, etc. Kids don't need £20 ice creams but they're still expensive. It would cost me loads extra every month if I had just one.

@pixie5121 oh definitely! I think if you have the money then you should be able to take as many holidays as you like. My sister doesn't want children and she spends loads on clothes, holidays etc and I say good on her. She made a decision and I think anyone should be able to decide how they want to live their lives. Any comments you get about going on holiday too much has got to be a tad of jealousy, your not hurting anyone and nobody is going without!

We have a really tight budget. 18 years ago we bought a cheap touring caravan. I know it's not to everyone's taste but when the kids were smaller we had 4 holidays a year plus bank Holidays for less than £1000 for all of them. My easter holiday this year was £189. We've had some amazing holidays which we never would have had otherwise.

@pixie5121 that's true, very few people truly have everything. There's normally a sacrifice or compromise somewhere. My best friend is very well off, she prioritised her career, didn't meet her partner until much later and is unlikely to have children. I had my children, but my career has progressed very differently due to the choices I've made and I subsequently have much less income in comparison.

I can’t believe how judgmental and ignorant so many people are in this thread are being. Granted op didn’t provide much detail of no of dependents where she lives etc, but without knowing this you cannot judge she isn’t budgeting properly. I lived in NE for 5 years past 26 years in Brighton second most expensive city outside London unfortunately. And I can tell you know if you live in the North you cost of living is significantly lower than ours even the cost of the same food in the supermarket is lower! So yes you probably can have a good life on £40,000 but here we have a joint income of £85,000 and we cannot afford to repair our house or go on holiday. We do not drive new or expensive cars we never ever go out as a couple, I do not drink alcohol or eat junk food or takeaways . My children are now at the age where we no longer need to pay for holiday childcare (after 23 years of paying for childcare) and yet we are really struggling to make ends meet. The cost of living here is OBSCENE! Coupled with the cost of living increases. Mortgage £1300 a month regular 3 bed family home, cars 10 years old broken wing mirror can’t fix, energy bill £300 month council tax £270 loan payment from years ago for house release £700 just cost £500 to buy new uniform for school. Parking not even city central £5 an hour £15 for 3-4 hours so NEVER go shopping. Last time we had a holiday was 3 years ago in a knackered filthy old caravan in Italy for a week. We don’t even have days out. I have an eldest an university and that costs ££ and only my youngest is now doing activities of tennis and football she is extraordinarily talented and is on a pathway for national sport it costs £120 month total no way am taking that away from her . I am really shocked at home rude and critical so many of you were towards op for saying what she spent on kids extra curricular activities.Its so incredibly helpful to confidence and other life skills to do other activities music sport arts etc and they cost money. The real issue is the cost of living especially on the south we have a lot higher expenditures that’s a fact. When my eldest was at home younger and I had 3 kids to feed they all did activities and one was in nursery so paying childcare and in school holidays our income was £20,000 less than it is now but we went to Dubai to stay with family and to Bali on holiday. Now we can’t afford a week in Devon in a rental . Hell I can’t afford to go across country and visit my eldest for the weekend. I am an excellent forensic budgeter always have been I know where every single penny goes. There are other privileges some have that end up costing over time. We have no savings at all. I have 2 very sick poor parents who own nothing and will only inhereit funeral bills. I have never had 5 mins childcare help or babysitting from family to ill far away and unsupportive and so we have paid for every single solitary thing we need for 23 years. I know plenty of people friends on less income than me who have saved £20,000 in childcare over the years because they have had family do it, get gifted money or inherit it, don’t have any ongoing health issues which end up costing a fortune to support as do mine and my eldest sons. Some people get gifted cars when their parents trade one in, others get cheap weekends away staying with family at their homes. Believe me if you spend 2 decades with not one single privileged pieces of support from family networks and you pay for every single thing you have EVER had in your life the cost REALLY mounts up and makes saving for holidays out of reach. Eg My gran died recently and it cost me £500 to go to her funeral to drive there and pay petrol across country and for 2 hotel rooms and meals for 2 nights for us all to stay in. My parents live in one bed supported housing alone individually my sister had her kids no room its a small town no travel lodge not much choice where to stay. These things have been a constant feature of my life. Last year my car needed £1500 of repairs had to borrow money to pay for that because can’t afford a newer better condition car which costs less! The reality is disposable income is about way more than income and budgeting. Its as much about where you live what support you get how many other resources you have number of kids and any additional demands like health etc. Try and be more open hearted and less judgmental!!! I know we had much more disposable income on way less salaries a few years ago when the cost of living was lower. Think before you speak please.

This is mumsnet. Why are there people on here who admit they are not mums preaching to mums about budgeting? Very confused. I thought this was for mums!

Agreed! It’s ridiculous when people make these claims but don’t reveal all of their circumstances eg type of accommodation other support freebies from family etc!