To think she does good deeds for the glory

[moita]

I realise I sound bitchy but a mum from my daughter's school seems like a glory hunter I feel. She is a SAHM (no shade, I am too) with a wealthy husband. She loves buying treats for the whole class and also makes sure to send a message around the mums 'buying sweets for them today- hope that's OK!'.

She's bought extravagant presents for the teacher and TAs (loudly talked about).

I think it's great for the kids but there's a few other mums who have done things for the school but done it very quietly and anonymously (only know as I have to go in a lot for my daughter and I've bumped into them kn the corridors etc)

I think I feel for the mums overlooked by use it's time rather than money they're giving.

I'm fairly sure the mums who give up their time to help will be more valued than insta-mum. I wouldn't let it worry you.

Meh, just one of those things isn’t it. Ignore and move on.

Meh, so what if she does 🤷🏻‍♀️ if people get treats and nice things for the teacher / TA and she feels good about it, what's the harm?

Not really good deeds in my opinion just flaunting your wealth.

I may be missing the point, but what if you don't want your children to have sweets at random times?

Just curious - mine are in their 20s so aren't sweet-deprived little mites with a tiger-mother.
(Well, not any more. Mwahaha!)

If it has to be announced then it's for glory. On another note, our school wouldn't allow that anyway. Not even allowed to bring class sweets on birthdays. A book can be donated instead 😂when the class have treats it's always arranged by the teachers and usually in line with curriculum or a fund raising exercise, not just parents turning up with food to give out to everyone. Very strange

Is it a private school?

Ask her if she'll pay for the dental treatment they'll need in the future.

Our school would also not allow the random sweets! Also think a few parents would be pissed off if they got that message.

Sorry, this doesn't answer your question, but I'm mildy miffed about the sweets. Ours get them on birthdays at school and even that can be too much!

Yeah a tad annoying but not something I could pay too much thought to.

I would be livid if another mum kept buying sweets for my DS. He has a tendency towards weight gain and we control the amount of sweets he has. I would definitely have to rain on her parade, and I'm amazed that no one has.

It seems a real shame that you are bitter about children’s happiness. How lovely it is that this woman would go out of her way to help the class. Instead of morning, perhaps you should put your energy into giving even better gifts. Just something to think about.

What would happen if one of the mums sent a message back saying, no, ‘I don’t want Johnny to have any sweets, we’re reducing the amount of sugar in our diet.’ I bet that would send Mrs conspicuous generosity into a right old tizzy, no glory for her or no sweeties for Johnny? You should try it OP, force her to be more creative.

Sending in sweets and buying extravagant gifts isn’t helping the class, it’s needy attention seeking behavior. Helping the school by giving time is helping the class, like the OP does

Sounds like the blonde mum on Motherland !!

Are all the other parents happy with their geets getting sweeties when this woman decides to send them in?

Wouldn't bother me.

I don’t think you need to feel for the unsung parents who help out unobtrusively — plenty of people, me among them, do things we think need doing without needing any kind of public recognition.

I’d also assume that regularly buying sweets for an entire class is as like to irritate fellow-parents as it is to impress, and in DS’s class, the parent who gets most gratitude is the one who volunteers annually to organise a collective teacher/TA present, not someone who gives an extravagant solo one. What benefit is it to anyone else?

Not the point of this, I know, but I wanted to let you know how I, as a TA would feel about the expensive gifts. In all my years as a TA (over 20), the gift that meant the most to me was the half-eaten miniature jar of jam given to me by a child one Christmas. His family were poor and could not afford gifts for teachers etc, but they always gave me a card with their heartfelt thanks. The child wanted to give me a gift and the only way they could do that was to pinch something from home. They knew enough about me to know that I had toast and jam as a treat at the weekend, so made sure I could have a treat 'on them' as it were. Even now, that gift means more to me than all the more expensive things I have been given - not that I am ungrateful, but that was from that child's heart. I would hope that most teachers and support staff are able to see through the 'showiness' of those expensive gifts.

Ahem, something in my eye...

That's such a lovely story.

Inverted snobbery.

It could be lack of confidence,she's searching for validation? Don't judge op.🌈

Why do you care?
Some other posters showing want to control sweet intake, I get.
But your post is just to whinge about her for no real reason. You don’t like her, we get it. Let it go.

My DD has a food allergy. I'd be livid if some random mum brought "treats" into school. Hopefully the school sees through it.