To approach this mum with this warning?

[swimmingwiththefishes]

Ok so I would NEVER normally approach a mum and 'point something out' BUT,

It's a hot day here (26 when I went to the park earlier) and I took the dog out for a walk in my local park. Took DS2 who's 6 months.

As I walked around the park and across some fields, there were two mums sat having a picnic of some sorts in the sun (no shade).

One of the mums obviously had a baby for a nap in the pram (I assume baby as bassinet attachment). To create some shade she had taken two muslins and draped them over the opening of the bassinet and clipped them with pram clips across the openings.

I'm pretty sure that this creates a hothouse type effect and can be quite dangerous. I actually had DS2 also napping and had a snuzshade draped over to stop the sunlight creeping in (black thin material with air holes to create shade but let the air flow).

I ummed and errd but decided I had to say something so really thought about the least offensive way to say it (I'm sure I could have found better!!).

Below is the convo. My friend thinks I was totally out of order to do this but I think I couldn't in good conscious not say anything

Me; gosh, it's soooo hot today isn't it? Nice to have some sun but poor little ones get so hot
Mum: oh yes, we're enjoying being able to get some sun!
Me: I'm not sure if it's helpful but I've found these snuzshade things really good as they let the air in so much more lightweight and breathable than muslins.
Mum: what do you mean?
Me: sorry, it's just I've read that muslins don't let the air through so can make babies hotter so I just thought I'd mention how great I've found this product as not sure if you're aware?
Mum: tell you what? Why don't you fuck right off and leave us the fuck alone
Me: ok, I'm literally trying to stop your child from overheating, that's all. Look it up.

I told my friend about the above convo and she said I probably came across as patronising and interfering. Yup, I probably did come across like that but that poor baby was probably roasting in there!

I'm sure I could have approached it better but WIBU?

You might find this blog post interesting- by the inventor of the snoozeshade. (Perhaps the mum you spoke to had already read it. Who knows.)

www.snoozeshade.com/blogs/news/please-dont-be-scared-by-the-its-dangerous-to-cover-your-pram-story

Hardly!
Depends on dog breed.
A fine coated slim , Long nosed fit Sighthound type breed is absolutely fine at 26degs c
A fat, unfit, heavy coated breed will struggle, as will any puggy squashy faced dog.
Every case on it’s merits.

So one opinion is preferable to another? The OP was incredibly rude trying to ram her views down someone's throat like that.

If you felt that strongly you'd have been better off saying it straight out
"excuse me, I know I'm interfering here, but (whatever evidence you have for this) says your baby is in danger of overheating. (However many) babies each summer are made seriously ill or die due to this so I couldn't in all conscience not tell you. There is this product that you can use instead"
Faffing about pretending to drop it into conversation is patronising. If it needs saying, say it straight.

It isn't just about them getting hot. Thete have been horrendous incidents of burnt paws.

I would have want to have been told- anything to do with a baby’s safety trumps worrying about feeling or being patronised- I would have been pleased for the advice!

I would of appreciated the advice. Guaranteed she will look it up and will be secretly glad you told her despite how rude she was.

For those insisting a Muslin was 'fine' as it's hardly a thick blanket, I post AGAIN this snippet from news article linked in earlier post

Over a period of seven minutes, when left open and uncovered, the pram heated up from 23.3 degrees to 29.9 degrees - an increase of just over 6.5 degrees.
But over the same amount of time, when covered by a muslin cloth, the pram heated up from 22.0 degrees to a sweltering 35.1 degrees - heating up by 13 degrees

@HearMeSnore Yes, thanks. Another poster posted something similar so I'll definitely stick to an uncovered pram from now on!

@JudgeJ

She was hardly ramming opinions down someone’s throat! This is a now we’ll-known safety issue where babies have been harmed. OP was trying to be helpful in a polite and friendly way. Big difference!

It’s interesting to see a big divide in here between people who generally chat to other mums and share ideas, helpful advice etc and see that as the norm. And others who are defensive and hostile to anyone who dare point out something helpful. OP was hardly having a go or being judgemental about a parenting style. This was about safety.

I'm normally firmly in the "don't get involved" camp but YWNBU. Seeing babies prams draped with muslins makes me shiver, poor little things.

I think you did the right thing. Child's safety first 100%

I had a lady approach me in M&S over the same thing - and it was a cold day. I just said thanks for letting me know and I'd let some air in.
They were rude CF's and I would have probably given them a mouthful if they'd responded like that to me. Some people are pigs.

On grass?? or Earth?

Unless it’s on fire I doubt grass or earth gets hot enough.
If a human can comfortably walk, barefoot a dog can.
Common sense.
A closed- mouth dog isn’t hot.
Always carry water.

You meant well, nobody likes having their parenting criticised even if you're right! I think its good you mentioned it overall

Nah, you were fine.

If you had been the other Mum and posted:

"We were having a picnic when a woman came up and said that Muslims clipped together could cause baby to overheat. She had the audacity to suggest a sage solution so I told her to fuck off."

Now that would be rude and MN would be equally rude in explaining why.

You did a good thing.

Muslins...sorry

Well most people have use pavements and tarmac to get to the grass and earth.

Advice from the RSPCA....

We recommend walking your dog in the morning or evening when it's cooler to reduce the risk of heatstroke and burning their paws on the pavement.

I was stuck in slow moving traffic and kept up with a Mum with a toddler in a pushchair (on the pavement beside me) - who was screaming her head off and kept turning her head to the side. She was full on in the sun with no shade, hat or glasses. I really felt for her. The traffic started to clear and as I was about to move off I yelled out of my window - ffs, give her some shade - and drove off! A bit cowardly of me I know.
OP, I think you did the right thing. Sure, she didn't appreciate it but I bet it will make her think twice about doing it again! Result, yes.

Walking a dog in 26 degree heat is not 'just as bad' as causing a baby to overheat ffs. MN is so strange sometimes.

I wonder if the posters jumping down your throat are the ones who cover/ed their prams with Muslims or blankets.

You meant well, you weren't trying to be spiteful. Like some others have said perhaps she felt silly and reacted badly she might look it up now

I wish there was stronger, more public messaging around this.

The same as there are with other baby campaigns about carrying in slings.

When mine were born there were no such safety warnings, and it took the death of a baby being carried in a sling for proper guidance to be released.

I wish they'd be proactive with covering pushchairs - use approved sunshades, avoid blocking air passage, keep in the shade etc rather than relying on people reading a news snippet.

Actually, the risk of heatstroke in ANY breed kicks in at around 24 degrees. For overweight or flat-faced breeds, that risk kicks in at around 18-20 degrees, sometimes even lower.

I'm a dog walker and I won't walk fit, healthy dogs once it hits about 22 degrees. For puppies, older dogs, unfit dogs, thick-coated and flat-faced breeds, I start cutting walks down at around 17-18 degrees.

It was 19 degrees here at lunchtime and my hour walks were cut to 45 minutes, and the wolfdog I was walking only got 30 minutes instead of her usual hour.

If I was doing something that could harm my baby without realising then I’d be so grateful if someone warned me!

You were being patronising and interfering. It also sounded as though you were going to launch into a MLM pitch! She overreacted bit I would've thought you were a twat