To be furious with daughters school.

[Incognitomum11]

Year 6 daughter. I came to pick her up yesterday from after school club to find that they had cancelled the club and my daughter had stood waiting for me for an hour, by the side of the road, all alone.

she walks from school and I pick her up from the small village on her request, to give her some independence in preparation for secondary soon.
I have a new job and have specifically given the school instructions to contact me on my work number because I have zero reception or internet at work.

BUT the school hadn’t even attempted to contact the parents to say the after school club had been cancelled.
they had only sent an email.

When I later looked at the email it clearly says “Please can you reply to this email to confirm you have received it.”
and normally they phone to check if they dont hear back.

but they hadn’t, they had told her I had been made aware and let her leave at usual time.

AIBU to be furious with them?

I know some of you may think that year 6 she should be able to deal with this but she had no phone and no money.

and in future, yea I will make sure she has a phone with her to school.

And not to have gone back when her mum hadn't appeared?

The OP has said that she will give her DD a phone from now on and I imagine that she'll also be instructed to go back to the school after a short period of time (if the school is still open, of course).

However, the main thing is that the school has a duty of care and as a result must tighten up its procedures - they absolutely must make sure that parents have confirmed they've received the email if that's what they've asked them to do, and they must not tell children their parents had been made aware of the cancellation if they hadn't. How anxious must that make a young child, wondering where its parent is, and vice versa.

I 100% support you and would be absolutely furious. EVERY school has a duty of care to all students regardless of age or year group. Their massive communication error put your child in a Vulnerable position, when you were at work thinking she’s perfectly safe at school. Completely unacceptable. Put everything in writing to the head, governors & log it with ofsted & possibly the education department. Would the responsible member or staff/s be ok with leaving a valuable painting at the side of the road for an hour, or their handbag or wallet? No of course not. Don’t let them make you feel you’re making a big deal of this, schools can be good at that. Glad your daughter is ok x

For me this is a safeguarding issue and the school have failed.

How is your relationship with the school? If you call them and specifically say you consider this to be a safeguarding issue it will ring all sorts of bells and buzzers internally.

Are you looking for a remedy? Im not sure the school can give you one after the fact other than to put a procedure in place to ensure that this doesnt happen again. Im not sure that permission to leave alone is, in itself enough for the school to defend themselves with. For me that doesnt extend to 'unplanned' excursions from the school as it means your DD is not where you are expecting her to be.

A word to the school is definitely in order. your DD is leaving in a few weeks so it doesnt matter if it all kicks off and the school need to be made aware they hvae fucked up...

Absolutely out of order from the school, my daughter is in year 6 as well and we've recently had some similar issues. If your school is like ours (tiny church run village school with no transport links at all) they're not allowed to carry a phone or money in their bags, and if the same had happened to my daughter, by the time she would have decided to return to the school she wouldn't have been able to get access. So I can completely sympathise with the situation. I think it definitely needs to be raised as a safeguarding issue, the fact she was sent off having been told that you were aware of the cancellation is unacceptable, she must have been so worried!

YABU

Your child is beyond old enough to tell a teacher or office person at school that her club was cancelled and she wasn't sure if you knew. Well old enough.

YANBU at all, that is not acceptable. It is a primary school.

You should make a formal complaint with the stated purpose that you want them to review procedures so this does not happen again.

Glad all was well with your DD.

Totally not OK. Unacceptable. Definitely complain to the head.

Was it an optional club or the actual afterschool childcare that you pay for? The former they do just usually email if it’s cancelled. Children without permission to leave on their own would be kept at school if not collected but if you’ve given permission then your child would be allowed to go. If your child is mature enough to leave school alone surely they’re able to tell someone that they thought there was a problem or return to school if you weren’t there? If they can’t physically get home what’s the plan if you don’t show up for any reason?

So then you can’t give permission for them to leave school alone? In which case they will be kept on school premises

I'd be absolutely raging

why didn’t she tell her teacher that she usually goes to after school club and mum has t said anything different

Well the school slipped up.
However your daughter should have gone back into school and explained that you had not shown up. They would have then realised you hadn’t got the email.

Our years 4, 5 and 6 are allowed to leave to meet their parents in the grounds or the roadside etc but it is stressed over and over again that if nobody is there to meet them they go back in and tell the teacher or office staff. This is an absolute rule.

Why didn’t your daughter do this? After all you could have broken down on the way and not been there to meet her.

The problem is your DD falls halfway between 2 systems - at our school ( and I'd guess most others) the child is either allowed to go home alone, or they are not.
If the school is phoning you, they should use your work number, and in schools which are fully computerised, that is the number that would come up on the system.
However these days most communication is by text or email, as the same info can be sent to several people at once. So an email will be sent to "all parents with a child in x club".
It is worrying that they asked for a response to confirm that you'd received the email, but then sent DD off regardless, but she would be on the list of "children who are allowed to go home alone."
Speak to the school and let them know that DD ended up waiting outside by herself because their systems aren't quite up to scratch, and that they didn't in fact contact you when they should have done. But also, as you aren't able to receive texts or emails at work, you 'd better arrange for these to be sent to someone who can pass them on to you.
As for DD, why didn't she go back into school?
Hopefully she is fine, and this is just the sort of eventuality that she needs to prepare for. Talk to her about how to contact you in the event of emergency, and what to do if she hasn't got a working phone on her. She was in a village near her school, was there nobody she knew around? Is there a phone box ( unlikely these days I know).
Obviously you are worried and upset, but if DD is to gain independence, she needs to be able to make sensible choices. She was presumably aware of the issues, hopefully she stayed in a safe place with plenty of other people around, and the only danger was her getting hot and bored.

Your local authority will have a Local Authority Designed Office (LADO) and it should be reported to them. It’s normally via an online form on the LAs website.

Yes that’s really bad. They should have had someone following up via phone those who hadn’t responded. Glad you daughter was ok, I’d be expecting a big apology and assurance procedures will be changed

Op's daughter had been told that Op knew that the club was cancelled.

The 9% saying your unreasonable are quite clearly not parents! This is a massive safeguarding issue and you should report it to the governors and Ofsted

But although that’s not okay, OPs daughter should have gone back into school.
Any car driver might break down or be stuck behind an accident.

This is so dodgy!!!

I would be furious ! YANBU

You are not being unreasonable. They have messed up with potentially dangerous consequences. They need to make sure this never happens again with any child.

Usually when someone is 'furious' with their child's school or teacher it's a bit if an over reaction, but no, I think you are well within your rights to be pissed off here.

I'd be making a formal complaint if I were you.

Zero internet at work ? What do you do that has no WiFi at all about

but even if you had not all companies allow people to have their mobiles on /check them at work

yes the school shouldn’t have told your dd that you knew club was cancelled

and yes they should have called your work landline

but equally dd needs a phone or knowledge to go to shop or office and aka for help