Anxious about going to work in Friday's heat

[Infinity07]

I work in a public sector job, it's very demanding, fairly physical and carries the responsibility of others.
I have a long term anxiety and a panic disorder (under treatment) which work are aware of but it's not really an issue there. However, I do have certain triggers and one thing is when the weather is extra hot like it's predicted to be on Friday (33°c here in the SE). The heat really makes me panic as I get anxious about how it physically makes me feel. I have health anxiety. The older I've got, the worse I seem to experience this.

So I'm debating with my conscience whether to take Friday off work or maybe part of the day off. Work will not accept my anxiety reason regarding the weather, I just know what they're like. So I'd have to say something else.

It's only Tuesday and I'm already getting so stressed about this. Don't know what to do.

Ah, the 70s! Those good old days before we invented mental health problems and just got on with it. If a woman was acting inconveniently, just call it 'nerves' and keep her drugged on valium or lithium.(Best not to tell anyone though, as its pretty shameful to be unstable and hysterical.)

Have you considered CBT for your anxiety? It can work quite well for some people.

You are worrying a lot about negative things that MAY happen.

It MIGHT be hot on Friday.
You MIGHT find it uncomfortable.

CBT isn’t going to change Friday but it’s a longer term intervention.

Having kids and being sleep deprived makes us less able to deal with stress.

What you can do is manage your stressors.

*Wear lighter clothes.
*Bring plenty of water (put in freezer the night before)
*Limit your expectations of what you can get through on Friday, the kids will be warm too and may find it harder to concentrate so adjust your plans for the day to suit everyone’s needs.

I hope you take the steps you need to make life more manageable. You have taken the first step in recognising that you need intervention, keep going with that.

If you look back through history enough you eventually realise that people have always been more or less the same. Society changes, our attitudes and priorities change, and we might use different words for things, but fundamentally people themselves aren’t all that different. Saying that people in the 1970s or the 1870s or indeed the year 70 BC didn’t have anxiety just makes you sound ignorant. There have always been anxious people, people with mental health struggles, neurodiverse people, people with learning difficulties and so on. We’ve just evolved different ways of talking about and approaching those things, as well as different ideas of what we can or can’t talk openly about.

I wasn’t alive in the 1970s but I grew up in the 80s and 90s with a parent with severe depression and OCD. I can remember watching him grapple with himself to get out of the door and get to work some mornings, and the turmoil it seemed to cause him. But l I can promise you not a single one of our family friends or any of his work colleagues knew about it because it just wasn’t something anyone felt able to talk about. If you didn’t know anyone with mental health problems in the 70s it’s very unlikely that they didn’t exist, it’s far more likely that it’s because people simply weren’t talking about it.

Maybe you have to change your job! How will the children cope with the heat and a new person having to fill in if you are not there. Pretty selfish you are only thinking about yourself! We only get 3 or 4 very hot days when the children are at school. Suck it up or change your job. Not senior management's fault. If you take a day off every time it is hot, it costs them double unless you are happy to take unpaid days and give your salary for these days to your replacement! Changed your mind now?

@Mirw in the wise words of firewomansam
"OP isn’t just ‘a bit anxious’ or ‘lacking in resilience’, she has a diagnosed anxiety and panic disorder, so if you have no understanding or experience of such things then please a) count yourself lucky and b) pipe down. Your smug judgmental comments could be the thing that pushes OP (or someone else suffering from the same thing who reads your posts) over the edge."

I'm about as big a fan of heat as it's possible to get on this site but there have been some horrible responses here.

Well schools are on holiday for most of that period so...

I totally empathise OP. My classroom reaches 40 degrees if the official temp is over 30. It's not just dealing with the heat, it's dealing with the kids dealing with the heat as well, although hopefully it will make them floppy and quiet which might be a relief! I'd have very limited expectations of what work they'll actually get done tomorrow. Go in prepped with bottles of ice and water and a flannel you can wet and have round your neck. Do you have a fan in your classroom? Can you ask for one? Keep the blinds closed and Windows open to get the air but not the Sun. Remember it is only 1 day. You can do this!

Let us know how it went OP.
Hope you are ok.

I always knew MN was full of some of the nastiest people around, I’ve just never seen so many of them on one thread before. As someone who suffers in the heat, and also has a (diagnosed by a GP) anxiety/panic disorder, it’s really upsetting reading some of these comments.

Thinking of you today OP, I get it 🌷

@nevergoesaway then check THIS out.

www.mumsnet.com/talk/relationships/4567914-am-i-being-selfish-to-not-lose-weight-for-my-husband

Well in the end I didn't go to work but it actually wasn't predominantly due to the heat. My baby is really poorly at the moment with tonsillitis and a high temperature (in this heat). It's been really hard to get her to drink with the pain she's in, she's screamed so much and we've had two nights of very little sleep. I have felt my anxiety levels heightened significantly today largely due to my daughter being ill but I know the heat has definitely contributed to it. When I'm anxious, I feel like I get tight breathing, racing heart, feel sick, dry mouth, etc. The heat just makes all those things so much worse.
So yes, I did the right thing for firstly my daughter and secondly myself today by not going to work.

Thank you for all the supportive comments. I've chosen to ignore the not so pleasant comments from people who don't seem to have a clue about clinically diagnosed anxiety disorders.

Lots of people don't have a clue about teaching either and should RTFT.
I do agree with those who have suggested that the heat thing might perhaps be more of a side issue to the underlying anxiety. As a fellow teacher, I totally understand the stress that the job (particularly in the current climate) gives, and that's before you factor in the other things you have going on.
Be kind to yourself and good luck.

Name change fail OP

Hi op how did you get on?
Do you have a fan at work?

I was also dreading it but it was cooler than my house

Hope your baby starts to feel better soon OP and wishing you a restful weekend.

I still think you need to talk to your manager OP. You have a health condition and they have a duty to support you and work with you where reasonable to enable you to do your job. I realise with teaching adjustments are difficult, but there may be some things that can be done for you. It would be better for them to know there might be difficulties on hot days so these could be planned for, rather than having to cope with a serise of unplanned absences if you can't bring yourself to go in.
Sometimes just getting it out there helps, as well, as feeling the need to hide your symptoms and act 'normally' can heighten the anxiety.
A health condition is not a failing or a weakness.

God there really were some fkn horrendous posts on this thread. OP I'm glad you looked after yourself and your little one. Take care.

You did the right thing fir you and your daughter OP and that’s all that matters