Anxious about going to work in Friday's heat

[Infinity07]

I work in a public sector job, it's very demanding, fairly physical and carries the responsibility of others.
I have a long term anxiety and a panic disorder (under treatment) which work are aware of but it's not really an issue there. However, I do have certain triggers and one thing is when the weather is extra hot like it's predicted to be on Friday (33°c here in the SE). The heat really makes me panic as I get anxious about how it physically makes me feel. I have health anxiety. The older I've got, the worse I seem to experience this.

So I'm debating with my conscience whether to take Friday off work or maybe part of the day off. Work will not accept my anxiety reason regarding the weather, I just know what they're like. So I'd have to say something else.

It's only Tuesday and I'm already getting so stressed about this. Don't know what to do.

I don’t think there are ‘plenty’ A few maybe but teaching usually tops the list of the most stressful jobs

Demanding and stressful aren't alway the same thing. I said one, you said the other.

Even if plenty of jobs <are> more demanding than teaching, it doesn't make being a teacher less stressful. It's not a competition. My comment was aimed at those pp reeling off the jobs that would be harder on a hot day.

A derail won't help the OP.

Some of these replies 🙄

I’m so sorry you’re struggling OP. I have an anxiety disorder too (and no, it’s not ‘self diagnosed’) and while the heat isn’t my specific trigger I don’t like hot weather at all, so I can well imagine how stressful the thought of Friday must be for you! I do agree with the comments that say avoidance is rarely the answer when it comes to anxiety though, and I can almost guarantee that the reality on Friday won’t be anywhere near as bad as all the scenarios you’ve probably already run through in your head.

And people living in hotter countries always think we Brits are pathetic for struggling in our ‘hot’ weather. But I worked in a hot part of the US for a couple of months, during the summer, and I quite seriously had to wear a jumper to the office because the A/C was so cold I was actually shivering. Meanwhile some visiting relatives from Texas laughed at us when we said going out and about in London on a 30+ degree day would be tough, because they’re used to far hotter at home. They soon changed their tune when they were swearing through their clothes of the tube and desperately looking for shops and cafes with aircon, realising to their horror that most places don’t have it as standard. Heat is a very different ballgame when you live in a country that doesn’t have it very often!

Oh and as for ‘people in the Mediterranean just get on with it’, when I spent a summer working in Greece my Greek colleagues bitched and moaned about the heat more than I have ever heard any Brit do! They hated it and spent all their time hiding in the shade and moving as little as they could possibly get away with.

Absolutely @LicoricePizza. Thank you

We had never heard of anxiety disorders back then Ah yes. The good old days when you were imprisoned for being gay and men could have their wives commuted to mental health hospitals when they got bored of them.

@onlythreenow if you want to update your knowledge and become less ignorant, you can access a lot of information these days for free.

We had never heard of anxiety disorders back then Ah yes. The good old days when you were imprisoned for being gay and men could have their wives commuted to mental health hospitals when they got bored of them.

Being gay is nothing at all like having anxiety, and I have never heard of any man having their wife commuted to a mental health hospital because they got bored of them. Maybe educate yourself about real life!!!

There is another thread on MN at present asking why so many people can't cope with a few hot days. Maybe take a read, it's full of sensible comments about how so many people these days can't cope with feeling worried/anxious about something so decide they must have a mental illness. I fully appreciate that SOME people do have anxiety disorder, but I guarantee that it is a small minority, not the vast numbers who think they have because they are lacking in resilience.

Oh and as for ‘people in the Mediterranean just get on with it’, when I spent a summer working in Greece my Greek colleagues bitched and moaned about the heat more than I have ever heard any Brit do! They hated it and spent all their time hiding in the shade and moving as little as they could possibly get away with.

I'm sure people do the same the world over, they certainly do here, but that is not the same as not being able to cope with the heat. They might bitch and moan - just as people do about cold weather - but they still just get on with it and don't fall apart.

A teacher at my place took an upright fan into her classroom…good for her & the kids. Try & keep the day calm by doing some quiet activities, like colouring. Use it for mindfulness & you can sit with the children & colour, too. But I know what you mean about management not giving a shit. Make the day work for you x

@onlythreenow

I have never heard of any man having their wife commuted to a mental health hospital because they got bored of them.

You’re really exposing your ignorance now!
Surely you know that historically women were carted off for all kind of spurious reasons to asylums, by their husbands?

Despite the good intentions of the 1853 Act, it appears there was still plenty of scope to abuse the system. Unfortunately, for many, asylums were regarded as prisons disguised as hospitals. It was a convenient way to remove the poor and incurable from society and for those with money, private madhouses were often convenient dumping grounds for unwanted wives.
valmcbeath.com/victorian-era-lunatic-asylums/#.YqpnVSTTWEc

On a hot summer’s night in June 1860, the heavy door of the insane asylum clanged shut behind Elizabeth Packard and she felt all hope desert her.
Because she was not mad. She was merely independent.

Yet according to 19th century psychiatry, female independence was madness. Elizabeth, a housewife and mother of six, had simply stood up to her domineering husband. As she would record in a defense of her sanity that she wrote while in the asylum, she’d insisted, “I, though a woman, have just as good a right to my opinion as my husband has to his”—but assertive women in those days were swiftly dispatched to asylums, institutionalized for causing “the greatest annoyances to the family” and for defying “all domestic control.” No wonder Elizabeth had found herself on the wrong side of a locked ward door in the Jacksonville Insane Asylum, in Illinois.
time.com/6074783/psychiatry-history-women-mental-health/

Hence why we’re still having to dismantle gendered prejudices when it comes to female health & mental health care today!

I thought everyone knew this kind of stuff - no?

It's been almost 38 degrees here for better than a week, with a couple of days going well over. This is the "new" summer. Remember when everyone was calling Greta Thunberg "cheeky?" This is what, in part, she was talking about.

I too have an anxiety problem and am not able to sleep tonight because of the heat.
I found magnesium helps, staying very hydrated and wearing loose clothing helps. I find anything in the stomach area that its better to let my stomach not restrict as this affects my breath.
I spent years putting myself in the situations of discomfort to try and mask my condition and had people telling me they too had an anxiety condition but just got on with it ( my sister ) here’s the thing when it’s bad it inhibits you doing things even things u enjoy . so just cracking on doesn’t always work. I found coping mechanisms from sitting in the fear but I have to conclude that part of that wisdom is also to allow yourself to know your triggers and avoid them because I spent decades of heart palpitations , not being able to swallow and general fear of dying and fear of medical intervention and just put myself through hell by facing the fear.
I imagine heat creates hypertension and that triggers anxiety . Not being hydrated gives u a dry mouth triggering how u swallow and breath. Sweating can be another trigger or even the feeling of lack of control.
I say if u can take the day off you will instantly stop the anxiety of having to go in and then please absolve yourself from the guilt of having taken that day off.

See knowing your triggers as part of your tool kit. Understand what helps calm things and focus in those areas. If that means avoiding the hottest and lets face it how productive would that day be anyway.
On that day try and create the right conditions for yourself .
today I noticed the deer all sat under a shaded tree it makes sense to allow yourself to stay cool calm and collected xx

get some of those little plug in USB fans from Amazone. They are surprisingly powerful. And a cheap facial toner mist, I love these for hot days. A spritz of this regularly with the fan going and you’ll keep nice and cool. Drink plenty of water. Take extra breaks, deep breathes, a cold flannel to put on your head too if that helps. Have you tried Bach Flower remedies for anxiety?

I even once made myself climb a mountain hiding my anxiety condition to my boyfriend at the time who loved climbing. I was sat on the edge of a mountain having panic attacks but hiding this from him with no phone reception and no way down but for hours of climbing. I think the only this perception of being weak or soft for having anxiety still lies underneath peoples perceptions. It’s ok to control what you can control. It’s ok to place yourself in a place of calm if u need the break from the waves of anxiety everyone needs a breather, a rest , a recharge. To give your nervous system a rest .
my best coping mechanism has been to distract my mind by doing things. Allowing myself to switch off or doing mental arithmetic or just doing something you are genuinely invested in.
I think sometimes its an alarm going off inside you to change things to allow yourself to make yourself more connected or contented in what you are doing day to day or as a plan going forward.
I hope you don’t battle with yourself internally over this be as kind to yourself as u would to another and don’t suffer in silence like I did. You are the best judge for your wellbeing because you are living the journey of your body . Everyone is unique and one size does not fit all. Which is why scientists are discovering the second brain our gut biome and diet can change our energy levels and our nervous system . A little bit of coconut water mixed in with water really helps with maximum hydration also eating water rich foods .
You are in the driving seat of your body and you can control its impulses and triggers . You can steer it away from danger , discomfort you have honed instincts and physical sensitivity . Allow yourself to be emotionally responsive to express discomfort we go through so much of our lives being bullied by conventions literally in discomfort trying to fit in that later could be seen as dysfunctional. Drinking I used to get so much pressure to drink because it was boring not to. It used to acceptable to smoke indoors or on a plane?? Now that would seem ludicrous today.
I remember a boy that would faint at the sight of blood he went on to be an airline Pilot. I thought I can handle my period but I couldn’t take the pressure of flying a plane.

FFS!!!!!!! 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️That really is all I have to say.

@onlythreenow I never said it was the same, I was giving examples of how much of society has moved on from different attitudes.

If you've never heard of men having their wives committed to mental health institutions for various ridiculous reasons, have a Google/read some books.

so many people these days can't cope with feeling worried/anxious about something so decide they must have a mental illness. The OP on this thread hasn't decided she has a mental health illness, she has been diagnosed by a healthcare professional.

I fully appreciate that SOME people do have anxiety disorder, but I guarantee that it is a small minority, not the vast numbers who think they have because they are lacking in resilience You can guarantee it? Where did you get your mental health qualification from?

Reading some of these replies make me feel really sad and exactly why people don’t feel they can talk about mental health issues. OP has stated she suffers with anxiety and yet the replies basically saying get over it or suck it up and get on with , are severely lacking in empathy! Also those looking to one up with their stories of how they have it worse so OP Should be grateful isn’t helpful either! I work in childcare and I often used to dread really hot days. Really hot inside and outside so you can’t really escape from it, roomful of hot and irritable children . There were several occasions where I would develop a migraine and be throwing up as soon as I got home. So I agree it can be so uncomfortable working in heat that you’re not used to. Sorry I don’t have any helpful suggestions really but just wanted to offer some sympathy as you don’t seem to be getting much xx take care

I totally understand. I work from home now but being too hot makes me feel awful. DP works (in an office) in a hospital, No AC no windows that can open, it got to 45 degrees in there last summer, he really struggles with it and it makes him really anxious knowing he has to go and sit in there for 8 hours. He has 2 fans, and takes in cool packs and frozen bottles of water to try and help but generally feels pretty terrible when he's finished.

Person living in the Mediterranean here, and I agree with you. People do moan even though we experience higher temperatures for longer periods, our countries are much better set up for the heat - houses built to stay cooler in the summer months, AC at work, AC on public transport, beaches and outdoor pools easily accessible for most people, AC at home for many people etc.

Absolutely spot on advice. I suffered anxiety for up to a year after getting slashed with a stanley knife trying to break up a fight between two neighbours. It was only cured once I started working out exactly which situations triggered it and facing them head on to convince myself there really was no issue. Only you can solve this so avoiding certain situations is the polar opposite of what you should be doing. Be brave.

I used to be quite an anxious and highly strung person who just ‘got on with it’ regardless and I always thought that’s what anxiety was, and privately wondered why other people were making such a drama out of it. I didn’t understand why people couldn’t just get on with things like I did.

Then a couple of years ago I started having panic attacks after dealing with various traumas and was eventually diagnosed with an anxiety and panic disorder, and oh my god. If you have never experienced it you have NO idea, just like I had no idea before I went through it.

I went from being a confident person who had traveled all over the world, to someone who couldn’t go to the supermarket or walk the dog without feeling the most crippling sense of panic and fear, deep within my body. My brain would be saying ‘don’t be ridiculous, everything is fine’ while my body would just be screaming DANGER at me. I had knots in my stomach so intense that my abs would spasm and cramp from the tension, I’d feel permanently sick and unable to eat (a big deal for me as I LOVE my food), I’d be dizzy and feel like the world was spinning and my heart would be thumping out of my chest. Just at something as basic as the thought of getting on a bus.

I’m a lot better now but still have the occasional lapse and I honestly wouldn’t wish that feeling on my worst enemy. At my worst moments I would have suicidal thoughts thinking about how I couldn’t bear to keep living with that feeling looming over me every day and would do anything to make it stop. This thread makes me sad realising how many people would have looked at me and thought ‘oh, she’s just lacking in resilience’.

OP isn’t just ‘a bit anxious’ or ‘lacking in resilience’, she has a diagnosed anxiety and panic disorder, so if you have no understanding or experience of such things then please a) count yourself lucky and b) pipe down. Your smug judgmental comments could be the thing that pushes OP (or someone else suffering from the same thing who reads your posts) over the edge.

I think the comments on here are generally quite supportive and understanding of true anxiety. I noticed another thread someone started about getting anxious over the heat and the majority of subsequent comments totally belittled anxiety.

so many people these days can't cope with feeling worried/anxious about something so decide they must have a mental illness

this isn’t a new phenomenon, in times past people used to talk about their ‘nerves’ or how such and such had a delicate disposition. Anxiety over things that the majority don’t experience is indicative of a deeper mental health concern.

Using the word ‘decide’ over recognising that an individual has observed their anxiety is different to others is very dismissive, unnecessarily unkind and rude.

You’re really exposing your ignorance now!
Surely you know that historically women were carted off for all kind of spurious reasons to asylums, by their husbands?

Did you miss the part where I was talking about the 70s? That's the 1970s, not the 1870s. Get over yourself and maybe read posts properly.

This is a very real thing. It's often exacerbated by pregnancy or menopause. The heat triggers intense waves of almost suffocation type feelings, dizziness, nausea, light headeness, sometimes fainting. How anyone can imagine that someone could not feel anxious at the thought of travelling on public transport, then standing in front of a class of children knowing this could start at any moment, is seriously lacking in emotional intelligence. And thats without the added complication of anxiety (that effects more of us than not at some level, particularly as we get older, so people shouldn't be too quick to scoff)
Just because other people can cope with higher temperatures, its no more meaningful than expecting a person with mobility issues to walk to work when their car breaks down just because other people can.

Did you miss the part where I was talking about the 70s? That's the 1970s, not the 1870s. Get over yourself and maybe read posts properly. I don't think the poster missed it, they were explaining why attitudes towards mental health came to be how they were. Your view of mental health certainly belongs in the 1870s!
The 1970s is a very long time ago in relation to mental health advances and attitudes. People most certainly did have anxiety, it was just referred to by other phrases/words. It seems more common today because it is talked about more and people are trying to reduce stigma towards it. Unfortunately mental health isn't seen as anywhere near as important as physical health. You wouldn't just say "your is broken but walk it off and you'll be fine". Well mental health can be just as debilitating. And often mental wellness and physical wellness impact each other.