” Husbands make sacrifices during their wife’s pregnancy that can take years to recover from.”

[AllAloneInThisHouse]

This is what I read somewhere else.
I’m sorry but it just me laugh.
Any guesses what he was on about?

Did he weave in 'women are biologically made for pregnancy and conditioned for years whereas men have to cope with the horror unprepared'? It takes years to recover from, if ever.

Oh god you've given me flashbacks to the time I got in a row with a local politician on FB (I know, classy bird me) who thought midwives should be asking the dads how they are in antenatal appointments. Because the appointments are all about the woman and the baby and he just felt so left out.

The discussion was brought to my attention by a friend agreeing with him, and commenting how offended he was that his wife was asked the domestic abuse questions. It was obvious just by looking at them that they're wealthy and so that isn't an issue.

The chair my husband sat on while I pushed my son out was uncomfortable apparently 😂

Not sure it took years to get over though 🤷🏼‍♀️

Is this just husbands then?

Won't someone think of all the poor unmarried blokes who are having to suffer this trauma?

No vinegar was safe when I was pregnant, let alone salt & vinegar. I was mad for it & would eat it on everything. Or anything with vinegar in. DH came out to the kitchen several times to find me eating pickled onions etc straight from the jar.

Mine had to miss the end of the football so I could give birth to our first son.
It wasn't an issue second time as I took my sister.

Poor wee lambs.

It's probably true and justifiable for a lot of men.

His decision to include the wife (which is oddly specific) does make it seem like he's thinks some men suffer more than their partner/the mother during pregnancy which is a nonsense.

@JenniferBarkley I know it's not what you meant but DV isn't class conscious amongst my patients, just that the wealthy are often better at hiding it. They welcome the notion it's only the working and under-class (they're terms).

He probably means it took him years to reconfigure his perception of his wife back to being his glamorous sex doll, after seeing her grow bigger in pregnancy, possibly not look sexy at every moment of those 9 months, and then unsexily give birth. Poor guy. Heart goes out to him.

I know, that was my point.

Poor guy, no wonder he divorced you, putting him through all that! 👀

Our water birth at home went on for too long and we had to transfer into a hospital maternity ward. Surely that justifies 5 years of man flu PTSD?

My dh had to adjust to there not being a default designated driver for evenings out. It was hard 🤣

One of the funniest things I ever read on MN was a woman describing how while she was in labour her partner bought a packet of crisps, put them on his chair and then absent-mindedly sat on it. He looked at it disconsolately and said 'Why do bad things happen to good people?' The midwife and the labouring woman apparently shared a good long eyeroll.

I assumed it was a study commenting on professionally. For example, when a woman has a high-risk pregnancy or complications or lots of illness, her partner has to take time off from work to accommodate that (which I agree with) but employers have no obligation to allow that time off and are often not very understanding. I'm not making a comparison to the impact of childbirth on women's careers, just saying that I can believe there are negative impacts on men professionally when they have to take time off to support a woman in pregnancy - and it would be better for everyone if employers were more understanding and supportive. If anything, it's a double-blow for the couples who have difficult pregnancies because both their careers are damaged simultaneously.

But, as it turns out, it was just a nutter ranting bullshit on Reddit haha.

24 hours into my 36 hour labour with ds, dh (who had been sent home to sleep overnight, I otoh had been awake all night contracting in a very warm hospital ward) commented that he was really tired. The midwife and I shared a look before she gave him a very pointed look. So traumatic for him

My poor DH had to have chicken Fajitas for tea every night for 3 weeks because that was all I wanted to eat. It was 8 years ago so I think he’s over the trauma now.

Was the comment written by Jacob Reese-Mogg by any chance OP?

When I was expecting my first child MIL was very concerned that DH wouldn’t find the birth upsetting because he was “very sensitive”

I have heard that some women give up waxing/shaving when heavily pregnant. Let's take a moment to think how tough that is for the menfolk. Some of them never fully recover.

What they don't get laid for a while and have to sit in an uncomfy chair for the birth, ahhh diddums, poor loves. My husband also had to help me with my shoes and socks at the end too, so much sacrifice, how on earth did he go through all that 3 times?

There is research on this - which shows that the earnings of men go up on average after having children, in stark contrast to those of women with children. So while there might be individuals who had their career damaged by their wife being ill during pregnancy it's really not a widespread or typical scenario.

Gulp. Imagine the sacrifices afterwards, which involve paying for your own children and having a wife bringing in less money for the family while on maternity leave. Although to be fair, MRAs never seem to date women with paying jobs anyway.

@HippyChickMama a lad in the pub was telling myself and DH how awful it was his wife went into labour a few days earlier than he thought. He had to leave the pub and go to the hospital where he sobered up into the worst hang over ever. Had to wait til the baby was born before he could get home for a sleep and shower, and he was just soooo tired. God love him. Even tho we were backpackers at the time and pretty care free he got huge eye rolls from us!!

I'm now 34 weeks along and DH has had to paint my toe nails, put sudocrem on a cut I couldn't reach. Live with a GD diet. Be half pushed out of the bed most nights (that one I disagree with). And my constant chorus of 'ooohhhh, ahhhhh'

Well this had me howling!
😂
Thank you for sharing!