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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Hairdressers or Barbers for teen son's haircut?

88 replies

magicaldaytime · 09/06/2022 23:01

My husband wants our son (13 years old) to go to his barbers for his haircuts from now on but I think he should keep going to my hairdressers because she knows how to do it properly.

Who's right here because we've had a row/argument about it? What do your teen son's do?

My son's hair is slightly longer than most boys hair so that's also another reason why I think My hairdresser should keep on doing it. That being said I might try to have a conversation (last time my husband just came up to me and said that he was going to the barbers next time and when I tried to have a calm conversation with him he just started shouting and arguing) with my husband and see if he thinks his barber would have a good grasp of his longer hair

OP posts:

AllTheMonacles · 09/06/2022 23:20

I've taken my boys to the barber from their first haircuts. However due to covid they started having massive queues outside and then went to appointments and I could never seem to get one when needed.
So I started taking them to my hairdressers but it's twice the price of the barbers and they don't get free sweets much to their annoyance.

ManateeFair · 09/06/2022 23:22

It really doesn’t matter.

I get my hair cut at a salon. There are always men in there getting haircuts. Two of the stylists are men. Plenty of men don’t use barbers.

However, the notion that a barber won’t be able to cope with your son’s longer hair is also nonsense. Barbers don’t only do short haircuts.

Basically you and your DH are both being ridiculous and your son is probably now scared to express his own preferences in case he upsets one of you.

WindyKnickers · 09/06/2022 23:22

Salons are often quite "girly" so your DH isn't wrong, but if your DS is happy with that, then there's no problem is there?

Also I don't think a hairdresser needs to "know" your hair though to be able to cut it 😂 Any experienced stylist or barber will be perfectly able to give it a trim.

paisley256 · 09/06/2022 23:23

Mine have all got long hair with different degrees of curls/waves so they all go to hairdressers.

When they've had shorter hair they went to barbers. They are aged between 11 and 16.

alwaysmovingforwards · 09/06/2022 23:24

YABU
Going to the barbers is a decent father / son thing to do. Remember my dad and brothers going, it was a bit of a thing on a Saturday morning they all seemed to like. Bit of chat, music, guy environment etc it's good for them.

fruitpastille · 09/06/2022 23:25

Barber here is £10-12. No appointment needed and DS feels comfortable to go by himself as a teen.

I think you should let him try it otherwise how will he know which he prefers. No need for your dh to be rude though.

FlipFlopShopInHawaii · 09/06/2022 23:25

He's a 13 Yr old boy, send him to the Barbers with his dad!
Soon he'll be able to go on his own.

Original poster

magicaldaytime · 09/06/2022 23:26

paisley256 · 09/06/2022 23:23

Mine have all got long hair with different degrees of curls/waves so they all go to hairdressers.

When they've had shorter hair they went to barbers. They are aged between 11 and 16.

My son’s hair is like this too In terms of curls/waves xx

OP posts:

Piffle11 · 09/06/2022 23:30

I've got a 14 year old with short poker straight thick hair, and an 12 year old with longer hair with a wave in it. They both go to the barbers, sometimes I take them, sometimes DH does. Stylists there are great. I second taking your DS to the barbers next time he needs a haircut, and from then on he can decide for himself.Any decent hairdresser will be able to cope with his hair.

Boxowine · 09/06/2022 23:31

Maybe he just wants to have a shared activity. Like a mother and daughter getting their nails done together?

YerAWizardHarry · 09/06/2022 23:34

How much do you pay at the hairdresser? I think the most I’ve ever paid for DS is £15 but it’s usually £10-£12

ancientgran · 09/06/2022 23:37

magicaldaytime · 09/06/2022 23:04

Well he more said he’s “not sure” x

Maybe he's not comfortable saying if you and your husband are arguing about it. My sons went off to the barbers by themselves at 13 and just told the barber how they wanted it done.

Blimeyherewegoagain · 09/06/2022 23:40

You son is 13! He gets to choose how and where he has his hair cut.

Marblessolveeverything · 09/06/2022 23:46

Barbers here from day one. Quicker, less hair spray, and a hell of a lot cheaper.

Eldest is 14 has had a number 1 to hair to shoulder blades over the years and all done professionally.

Youngest 8 ranges from mohawk to chalk colours for breast cancer aware 😂. They get lollipops and talk cars, cats or David Attenborough, it's their time in a man's world.

I used to go with them but once they got to seven or so I wait at coffee shop outside. Hate hairdresser myself there always seemed to be someone whining on when I go.

Lou98 · 09/06/2022 23:57

magicaldaytime · 09/06/2022 23:09

I did suggest to DH maybe a mobile hairdresser who comes to the house but he just walked off in a huff

If you were willing to change from your normal hairdresser to someone mobile, why wouldn't you be willing to change from your normal hairdresser to try the barber?

My little boys only 1 but he's had a couple of hair cuts at his Dad's barber. I think my Partner sees it as bonding time as he goes along with him and they usually go to the park or something after. I honestly don't mind where he gets his hair cut and I went for his first one and the barber is brilliant, he used to be our neighbour and is a lovely guy.
They don't just do short hair either, my friend's 3 year old has lovely blonde curls just past his shoulders and he's always cut it nicely.

Your Son is 13, not a young child, surely the choice should be his? Why not take him to the Barber's next time and let him decide which of the two he prefers, would save a lot of drama

SkankingWombat · 10/06/2022 00:06

I'd send him off to the barbers to see how he got on. If he has curly hair, maybe try an Afro-Caribbean or Turkish barbers. DH is Black and swears by the two Turkish barbers in the nearest town (he'd have to go 2 towns over for the closest Afro-Caribbean barber).

FWIW, I have 2 DDs. They get their hair cut by a hairdresser who is well versed in cutting long curly hair (a rare find in our very White area), but still fight over who gets to accompany Daddy to the barbers. They like the music and chatter (and also the complimentary lollypop); it is a fun and social activity. It would be a nice bonding time for your DS and DH too.

Dinoteeth · 10/06/2022 00:25

You are being daft.
The last time I was in the barbers with my boys, the barbers sister came in to get a quick trim on her long hair!

Jealous or what?
I can never find time to go to hairdresser or when I do have time they are fully booked. I might take a brave pill and get the barber to sort mine. At a fraction of the time and cost. And no need to book!

FlissyPaps · 10/06/2022 00:38

YABU - For assuming a barber won’t know how to cut longer hair properly. They are trained in full re-styles and shaping.

Your OH is BU - For assuming a 13 year old boy going into a salon for a hair cut is girly.

If your son is happy how your hairdresser cuts his hair then let him carry on going there.

This shouldn’t be a big deal. Both adults needs to get a grip.

Bunty55 · 10/06/2022 00:39

OP I have questions.
Does your husband have long hair?
Does your son have long hair because you like it like that or is it his choice?
Are you afraid your husband will get your son's hair cut short at the barbers ?

paisley256 · 10/06/2022 07:51

@magicaldaytime it's because of the curls/waves we go to the hairdressers, the barbers seemed to just cut it into a triangle but the hairdressers take more time with each individual curl pattern - just our experience.

paisley256 · 10/06/2022 07:51

@magicaldaytime it's because of the curls/waves we go to the hairdressers, the barbers seemed to just

paisley256 · 10/06/2022 07:52

@magicaldaytime it's because of the curls/waves we go to the hairdressers, the barbers seemed to just

paisley256 · 10/06/2022 07:53

Ooh not sure what happened there!

Bwix · 10/06/2022 07:54

I’ve taken my boys to the barbers since they were toddlers. I expected them to go by themselves when they got to their teens. Of course barbers know how to do different length hair.

also they are much much cheaper than a hairstylist. Your dh is right.

Hoolahulahoop · 10/06/2022 07:55

I've always sent mine to the barber from a year old. He's going to feel silly in a ladies salon going into his teen years. Barbers cut lads hair several times a day so of course they will do a great job.

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