To be concerned that the Depp/Heard trial has put off genuine DV victims from coming forward?

[PetraBP]

The Depp/Heard trial was troubling to me.

On the one hand, people do sometimes make false allegations, especially after relationship breakups.

On the other hand, dragging someone to court for alleging domestic violence might deter some women from reporting it.

Assuming the court got it right and Depp was not a perpetrator, how could he have handled the situation so that it would not put domestic violence victims off coming forward for fear of being sued?

Worrying all round.

I did watch it. I don’t want or need your respect.

@Pumperthepumper okay. If you say you watched it then I believe you. I wouldn’t bet money on it though as I think I would lose 😂

Ok, thanks for your feedback. Yo

A friend sent me this which I thought was an interesting and disturbing read

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1rgcwaYtAilfXz-1fsOuZZ_hiQe24DXGKsQmmK40ZevE/mobilebasic

I think the difference with this case is a narcissist was exposed in all their ugly glory. She used the fact she was a woman and he had the power but most people didn't believe her when her true self was exposed.

I think this has been positive for narcissist victims. Honing down to that demographic I bet it's more 50/50 perp/victim.

I also think narcissists are more common than we think and this case has highlighted to many what people actually have to endure living with this.

I have seen no evidence online of women being blamed. I see mutual support and acknowledgment that MeToo is for victims. All victims.

It gets nasty when some feminists, especially with far reach online absolutely insist that AH was the victim and they pile in, denying any survivors of their own thoughts on the case. Those and their supporters are the ones that are pushing back on womens rights imo putting out the narrative about women being blamed/set back. It's almost like they want to keep us in our little box and it's annoying many women survivors who recognise abuse, right there, televised right in front of their eyes.

And for the love that all is holy, the UK trial was a farce. No jury. Biased judge with dubious connections, took AH at her word, ignored credible evidence, relied on therapists notes (those medical records AH team harp on about which are not medically proven and hearsay).

It's not a yeah, but...it really isn't

Amber Heard is both a victim and an abuser. So is Johnny Depp. The reason the trial shouldn’t have been televised is not because she’s innocent, it’s because their relationship was toxic as fuck and he’s too well known.

I don't think many people look at the lives of the rich and famous and apply the way they interract with the world to their own lives tbh.

@tackling I agree. It does seem disturbing but I haven’t looked at it in great detail. The facts though In the USA trial do suggest that amber is toxic and abusive. At the end of the day I have no definitive evidence of who is the 100% victim or if they were both victims. I only know what was presented at the trial and I don’t believe Amber based on that evidence. Could I be wrong, yes of course I could be. I also believe that article doesn’t cover other issues like lying about the the donation and other audio recordings about the Australian incident with his finger which have proved she does lie even under oath.

No pumper it's because she wanted to play the victim for her own gain and she went public riding on the wings of battered women, not expecting Depp to stand up to her and say actually no, that's not the truth.

No way in the US trial did he cover himself in glory. It's quite clear it was toxic.

That’s bullshit though. How many rich and powerful men have ever been taken down by one woman? Especially men as loved as Jack Sparrow and Edward Scissorhands. What did she gain from any of it?

"That’s bullshit though. How many rich and powerful men have ever been taken down by one woman?"

He loved her, no doubt about that.

You ever lived with a narcissist, with potential other personality disorders?

Trust me, money and power doesn't come into it.

Btw, I think she's mentally ill and needs proper intervention. I don't think she's evil. Looks like she's surrounded herself with enablers for years.

@Pumperthepumper she was banking on him keeping schtum, so what she wanted was very different from what she got.

From the article

NOTE: Amber Heard’s story is that Depp was on a three day bender; they’d argued about a prenuptial agreement, he’d assaulted her multiple times, and cut his own finger on the bottle then used it as a “paintbrush” to write bloody messages on the wall. She claims she didn’t see it happen and that the next morning when she got up she saw the blood and Depp sitting in her art studio with his finger wrapped up.
He admits to writing in blood on the walls and says it was lies she’d told him.
He says he lied about how he got cut because he didn’t want to get her in trouble. One story he told a doctor was that he’d cut it on an accordion. Another was he’d slammed in a door.

Apparently when this happened two private doctors were staying nearby to treat Depp for addiction to opiates and monitor his detox process.
They testified they helped him with his finger and hadn’t seen anyone being abusive
One of those doctors (who is apparently still his private doctor) knew him well and had previously helped Depp detox from opiates (in 2014). He testified under oath that Depp had told him he’d cut himself, and that several days later Depp had texted him again indicating he’d cut it himself and saying he needed to “not do that again”.

Money and power absolutely comes into public opinion though. She gained nothing from it. She could never have won against him.

"Money and power absolutely comes into public opinion though. She gained nothing from it. She could never have won against him"

But she did? Not now though.

His money and power didn't affect my opinion one bit. I used to believe her.

I'd be mentally ill after living with this asshole too:

JOHNNY DEPP’S REPORTED USE OF ABUSER TACTICS ON THE POWER AND CONTROL WHEEL
Intimidated
Exploded into rages frequently
Punched things when he was enraged (walls next to Heard’s head, a sconce on the wall, etc.) Destroyed furniture and cabinets while raging (couches & cabinets; was arrested for destroying a hotel room and forced to pay for the damages. According to the police report, his then partner, Kate Moss, was “found sitting amid the wreckage”.
Threw and broke things when in a drug-fueled rage
Yelled and banged things
Smashed wine bottles
Vandalized Heard’s art studio
Source: on video, numerous observer accounts, Heard under oath, Depp under oath, Heard restraining order application
Threatened
Screamed threats to kill Heard multiple times while assaulting her (“I’ll fucking kill you! Per Heard under oath)
Acknowledged he’d fantasized about killing Heard
Threatened to violently assault Heard (texted “I’ll smack the ugly cunt around before I let her in”),
Threatened to ruin Heard’s reputation
Stated he wanted to torture and kill Heard, in a text to a friend “Let’s drown her before we burn her!!! I will fuck her burnt corpse afterwards to make sure she’s dead.”
Texted a friend saying Heard is “begging for total global humiliation. She’s gonna get it. But she sucked [Elon Musk’s] crooked dick and he gave her some shitty lawyers … I have no mercy, no fear and not an ounce of emotion or what I once thought was love for this gold digging, low level, dime a dozen, mushy, pointless dangling overused flappy fish market … I’m so fucking happy she wants to fight this out!!! She will hit the wall hard!!! And I cannot wait to have this waste of a cum guzzler out of my life!!! I met fucking sublime little Russian here … Which makes me realize the time I blew on that 50 cent stripper … I wouldn’t touch her with a goddamn glove.” (to agent Christian Carino)
May have threatened or hurt Heard’s small dog, since she requested in the restraining order that he be made to stay away from it
During an assault was overheard on the phone threatening Heard, “What if I peel your fucking hair back?”
Threatened to hurt himself with a knife with Heard’s nickname engraved on it, wielding it in a drunken rage and begging her to cut him over and over (audio recording)
Threatened to ruin Heard’s career; “Johnny told me he would ruin me. That no one would ever touch me professionally. That I'd never work again. I'd be selling Depends”, referring to the adult incontinence products....."He'd ruin my career. He refused to not engage with the press by leaking false (stories).”

Verbally abused Screaming at Heard
Swearing at Heard
Calling Heard vulgar names
Called her “talentless” and made her cry (per friend iO Wright under oath)
‘All she’s got is looks and she has no talent, and when her tits start to sag and her face gets wrinkly, nobody is going to be interested in her for anything, so she better figure out another way to survive.” said to Heard’s friend iO Wright ( as stated under oath)
Referred to her in vulgar terms in texts to friends, which indicates he almost surely talked to Heard in the same way, since he has no problem disrespecting his wife in such a way.
Physical abuse
According to Heard’s testimony under oath Depp has:
Slapped her multiple times
Pounded her head
Hit her (caused facial bruises, bloodied her lip, black eye)
Pulled out chunks of her hair
Shoved her to the ground multiple times
Shoved her onto the bed and ripped off her clothes
Thrown her onto a ping pong table with broken glass broken glass and dragged her through it (claims she still had scars on her arms and feet from an incident where Depp allegedly
Kicked Heard (Depp’s assistant Stephen Deuters texted Heard apologizing for Depp having kicked her the night before. “He’s done this many times before,” she replied. “Tokyo, the island, London (remember that?!), and I always stay. Always believe he’s going to get better … And then every 3 or so month, I’m in the exact same position.”
Cut lip and swollen face observed by Heard’s sister, as stated under oath
NOTE: There are allegations that Depp has abused other women, although as stated previously, Ryder and Paradis have both denied ever being abused by Depp. It’s not known if they signed nondisclosure agreements that would prohibit them from talking about it.
Possibly pushed Kate Moss down the stairs (per Heard under oath, she was told by two different friends of Kate Moss, however Moss denied this under oath at the trial.
Threw a bottle at Ellen Barkin (per Barkin, who testified at this trial)
Overheard on phone punching Heard then taunting her, “Oh you think I I hit you? You fucking think I hit you? What if I peel your fucking hair back?” The phone dropped and Heard screamed. (Per Heard’s friend iO Tillet Wright under oath, who called the police when he heard this happening)
SOURCE:Photos of bruised face, black eye, other injuries, medical records described by an expert witness under oath, Heard under oath, text messages by Depp, texts by Depp’s assistant
NOTE: multiple examples of violence towards others, outside the home; fought with friends and threw a wine bottle towards her, per Ellen Barkin (under oath)

Sexual abuse
Reportedly raped Heard multiple times
Did an invasive search of her body with his fingers looking for drugs he accused her of hiding
Shoved his fingers into her vagina on multiple occasions
Threw her onto the bed, ripped off her clothes and raped her with a bottle
Accused Heard of sexual infidelity
Used sexual slurs and abusive sexual language when speaking to and about Heard
SOURCE: expert witness under sworn oath, Heard under oath
Isolation
Used obsessive jealousy to control Heard and keep her away from certain people (by his admission)
Tried to control which movies she worked on & which actors she worked with
Verbally acknowledged he was “jealous” and “weird” when she worked on movies
Erupted into a rage when a woman placed her hand on Heard’s shoulder because he thought she was being “too affectionate”
Cut her off from her friends, per Heard’s sister under oath
Controlled her cell phone “at all times” per Heard’s sister under oath
Smashed phones many times during fights
Former girlfriend Ellen Barkin has been quoted as saying, “He’s just a jealous man, controlling, “Where are you going? Who are you going with? What did you do last night?”
SOURCES: Heard under oath, Depp statements, Heard’s sister under oath. Barkin under oath
Denial
Repeatedly insisted (including under oath) he’s never abused any woman, in any way, despite evidence to the contrary, and witnesses including ex Ellen Barkin and Heard’s sister
Specifically denies ever abusing Heard in any way
Has admitted or implied to others he’s been abusive with Heard
Texted Heard’s father, “Yes I fucked up and went too far in our fight.”)
Suggested Heard was faking her injuries and that they were from a 'secret Fight Club' (referring to the film about an underground boxing group).

Many times denied ever abusing any drugs (although he talked about it at the trial to explain or justify his abusive behavior) and despite multiple witnesses, photos of him with drugs, photos of him passed out, numerous accounts of his drug-fueled rages, acknowledging going to a two week detox program, his doctor testifying that he’s helped Depp detox from opiates, stimulants, benzodiazepines, and alcohol ; Depp’s doctor stated that Depp was abusing Xanax when Depp and Heard were dating; Depp has said since the age of 12 he's taken all manner of substances, including marijuana, cocaine, ecstasy, LSD, prescription painkillers, opiates and magic mushrooms.
Denies being abusive to Heard in any way, yet Heard’s sister testified under oath that the couple always fought when Depp was drinking, and that by the end of the relationship Heard had stopped sleeping as much, didn’t laugh like she used to, and weighed only “100 pounds soaking wet”
Depp’s former girlfriend Jennifer Grey was quoted as saying that Depp was “crazy jealous and paranoid”.
Minimization

Depp made light of his threats to kill Heard
Has reportedly been violent with strangers and co-workers, but doesn’t consider it “abuse”
Smirks, laughs, giggles in court, including when Heard testified about his abuse, and when she acted afraid of him
Depp's our private doctor stated under oath that Depp “has no accountability for his behavior".
Economically abused
Depp tried to stop Heard from working on certain films
Sued her for 50 million dollars to try to break her financially
Emotionally abused
Depp has been verbally abusive, per his own admission

Was “incredibly mean and vicious” when drinking, per iO Wright under oath, who lived on the property for a while and was a friend of the couple’s for several years

Talked trash/called Heard names when communicating with friends during their marriage
Purposely tried to make Heard feel bad about herself
Talked trash about various other former intimate partners (referred to ex-wife and mother of his children, Vanessa Paradis, as “the French extortionist, ex-cunt”)
Used manipulative kindness to convince Heard he was sorry so she wouldn’t leave him
Cried and begged for forgiveness after abusing Heard but made no genuine attempt to change
Got down on his knees and said “I thought I’d put the monster away” (referring to his persona when he was in a rage)
Accused Heard of being unfaithful
Controlled what Heard wore, made her wear more conservative clothing, per Heard’s sister under oath
Sued Heard for revenge (“She’s going to hit the wall hard!!” “She’s begging for global humiliation!”)
'I was trying to get him to call the dogs off. He was calling me a liar…I kept saying don't make me prove it. He was calling me a liar and having a sophisticated PR machine (speak to the press).' Was extremely controlling and jealous, per former girlfriend Ellen Barkin (under oath) Accused Ellen Barkin of having sex with someone because she had a scratch on her back Blamed Blamed Heard for abusing him; testified under oath that she’d abused him Blamed her for throwing a vodka bottle cutting and off part of his finger
Blamed Heard for pooping on his bed
Blamed Heard for defaming him (writing the article that didn’t name him)
Blamed Heard for losing money because of her article
Blamed Heard for talking about his abuse of her (although she didn’t have any choice in court)
Blamed her for him picking up a bottle of liquor and drinking out of it and relapsing
Blamed Heard, who was helping the doctors detox Depp, for “withholding drugs” from him, saying it was "one of the cruelest things that she has ever done"

The above is only a partial list of Johnny Depp’s behaviors I learned about that are listed as abuse tactics on the Power and Control Wheel, It is doubtless not an exhaustive list of reported abuses.

What did she gain?

Honestly, mn baffles me. If a poster came on writing about this and said she'd hit back, no one would say she was abusive.

I've not watched any of the case . I'm in the UK and watch quite a few real documentaries/police programmes highlighting this issue.
In the UK I think it's more the lack of cases actually getting to court because the CPS don't believe aconviction will happen. Women (and men) go through hell, and if they get to court their abusers get a hand slap. One I saw had pleaded guilty, absconded the country and when brought back after his partner was cross examined etc he got something like 6 weeks but due to an time spent after being extradited he walked free. His partner physically collapsed , police officers were devastated .

"What did she gain?"

Are you serious? She's still in Aquaman 2, L'Oréal, UN, social media presence?

You're deliberately avoiding my other points.

I was in a relationship with an abusive ex. I held the power, I earnt the money, i held the professional job. He reduced me to a shadow.

Now he's still the victims and I'm the bad one, just like his ex.

They all play from the same hymn book. Just because she has XX chromosomes doesn't make her immune from being a liar.

She had all that anyway!

She gained nothing. She’s abusive. So is he.

I also think there’s something specifically about Johnny Depp that sways public opinion, I think a lot of people see him as affable, loveable Jack Sparrow and can’t separate the man from the character.

She seemed horrible. Made me feel sick to watch her. It was pure gaslighting. She took no responsibility for her behaviour.

So.... she hit her ex-wife, her sister, and her best friend (don't know her name, but she said they were best friends until Amber hit her or something like that), and she spat on her assistant. How come people are still deluded and call this nasty person a spokesperson for DV victims.

I'm sorry for the people that are defending her, this woman is horrible and she is playing the poor victim role. She is backed by Elon Musk, the richest man in the world.

There were two forensic accountants in the trial who forecasted loss of earnings based on past roles, one testifying for Depp, the other for Heard. Depp’s estimated $40 million. Amber’s forensic accountant was not credible in my eyes when she placed Heard as the same level as someone like Zendaya. They both probably lost future contracts but Depp being the much bigger star was bound to lose more financially as it was clear leave movie studios would not take him on any longer for big roles as evidenced by being replaced for Fantastic Beasts and until Heard wrote her Op-Ed it was expected Depp would continue being part of future Pirates of the Carribbean films then suddenly he wasn’t. P of C was a huge earner for him.

Near the end of the trial Jerry Bruckheimer, longtime P of C’s producer, on being asked asked if Depp could return for the upcoming film, he said, "Not at this point. The future is yet to be decided.” It sounds to me they were waiting to see the verdict outcome illustrating it was more probable than not he was dropped because of the AH allegations. Depp of course says he will never return now.

Ps and meant to add the four of films he has been involved in since AH allegations were smaller fees than he had commanded until then.