How can she start school like this

[Butwhendoesitgeteasier]

Dd is 4 in July and due to start school.
She’s so headstrong and hard to control. She’s a sweet and bright girl but doesn’t do anything she doesn’t want to do, she also can’t stay focused for long and wants to be off playing.
I realise a lot of it is her age, but I just can’t see her sitting down in Reception and completing tasks. I made some activities today and she lasted around 10 minutes before wanting to stop, it’s the same with painting etc

Feeling worried for her, I don’t want her to spend her days getting into trouble with the teacher.
I don’t know where I’m going wrong

Very true. What one LA agrees to has no bearing on another and that's before you even add the complication that academies bring. Each new school - secondary, 16-18, and possibly junior if not at a primary - would need to agree to the deferred place.

There's a fair bit of 'oh just defer them' on this thread like it's really common and everyone with summer babies is keeping them at home an extra year. But in my (pretty extensive) experience it's not that usual at all. Like I say, I've never come across it.

Obviously it's the right decision for some children but it shouldn't be undertaken lightly.

Nursery is brilliant for getting them used to a school setting. Mine went to pre school from age 3! Prepares them for sitting down and listening to the teacher.

The teacher will know how to deal with the small concentration of inda

My late summer born DS was 4yrs and 3days old when he started school with his best friend who turned 5 the same week. There was no discernible difference in the first few years and no academic difference at all. He seemed emotionally younger than his peers when was around yr9 but nothing major.

He's just finished uni with a first class degree and hasn't 'suffered' at all from always being the youngest (except when they went to the pub on the last day of school and he couldn't have a drink with his mates)

My children all went it he adjoining nursery at 3 yrs and from my experience reception is not kucb different to nursery.
she’ll learn to do as she’s told but in the mean time make sure you’re not pandering to her too much.

The teacher will know how to deal with infant pupils and they will learn to sit down and listen in their new class environment.
Most kids are like this so don't worry. Most act very differently for their teachers and in front of their peers.

How has covid impacted 2 year olds? 🤔 thars just an excuse youbfeel you need. Even my 6 year old who started school at 4 at the start of the pandemic hasn't been impacted.

Even if a summer born is deferred for a year that child still gets 30 hours free childcare a week.

The 30 hours childcare lasts until whenever the child starts school, it isn’t age dependent.

Yes, which parents ask for and generally do get it.

Not all LA allow you to defer a year and start in reception. Ours say you have to go straight into year 1 if you defer. To be honest though it is life that there will always be the youngest and the oldest in class. Somebody has to be the youngest. I found with my DD Zeno was the youngest it helped her so much as she never got bored learning new things. Unlike my friends DS who was a September born and was bored and finished his work before the rest of the class. This led to him being disruptive.
your DD sounds ready. Confidence is the key and she sounds like she has that.

Yep. I agree. But parents may be accessing more than 30 hours because of work commitments.

Also, if your child is in nursery they're usually there during holidays as well because it's difficult to stop and start places. So those 30 free hours, term time only won't go very far.

I think it's such a personal decision, but you need to think long and hard what you want to achieve.

I'm Scotland, so can keep them home until 6, but for mine, reluctantly they are ready at 5. In order to prepare for that I have started her at nursery at 4, to ready her for it. Just two mornings, but enough to get the basics of leaving etc.

If you have decided to miss that stage entirely then perhaps look at deferred entry, or starting pre school now.

Ultimately she will be fine, but I don't think it's fair in her to say she won't cope when she hasn't had a chance to even do the basic bits like be away from you.

Your comment is pointless.

You said children start in reception if they start school late. I pointed out that this isn't the case. If you don't specifically request a deferral they will start in Y1.

Whether that request is granted or not is completely irrelevant.

Gosh - people have written a lot of tosh on this thread.

Most reception teachers don’t know how to make a four/five year old sit and pay attention if the child doesn’t want to.

Reception is not about playing, it isn’t an extension of nursery. Yes they play more than in other years BUT need to sit for extended lengths and pay attention - they just don’t do it at desks.

You’re in for a rough ride OP. But there is nothing you can do about it except smile and wish you lived in a better county which started school later.

You said children start in reception if they start school late. I pointed out that this isn't the case. If you don't specifically request a deferral they will start in Y1.

Thats no different to when you stated that children who start school a year later go straight into Key Stage 1 and I pointed out that wasn’t necessarily the case.

Most parents who request a deferred start do it because they don’t want their child going into reception at just turned 4 years as they feel their child is too young to start education and so they would obviously want them in Reception at just turned 5 instead.

I doubt there are many parents who would request a deferred start on the basis of their children missing all of Reception and then going straight into Year 1. It would defeat the whole purpose.

It’s not always easy to get schools to agree to a Reception start when the child is aged 5, but for a lot of people it is quite easy to arrange.

I spoke to five primary schools about sending my son to reception at the age of 5 and four of them said it wasn’t a problem.

They acknowledged that it is a parent’s decision to make as to when their child starts school and that the Reception years are crucially important and so of course they wouldn’t deny my child the right to start the education process in the same every other child does.

As I said, some people really do have to fight for Reception starts but most parents who want a deferred start are happy to take on that battle and they usually win in the end.

I considered deferring my summer-born for similar reasons and throughout Reception I was reassured that I'd made the right decision to send him with his age cohort.
Now he's in Y1 it's a completely different story, he's academically able but immature and just wants to spend his time playing not sitting at a desk revising for phonics screening tests. He is always saying how much he misses pre-school and being able to play. I wish I could go back in time and delay him by a year, that extra time to develop emotionally and socially would have done him so much good and he'd be absolutely flying now.

I think it depends on the nursery. My bright Summerborn who needs routines wasn’t bored at all at nursery. The nursery is brilliant and have a qualified teacher. He is now doing very well in school and was socially much more ready for it at just 5 than he was at 3 and a few weeks!

i work as a TA in reception. In September we don’t expect more than about 10 minutes concentration from the children, and we always have several who don’t yet ‘get’ the flow of school (sitting on the carpet when asked, turn taking, waiting for things like playtime and lunch). It’s fine, if you are concerned talk to your child’s teacher before the year starts but we honestly know what to expect with summer born children.

in my LA if you defer they go straight into year 1 which if your child isn’t going to spend this year in a nursery, will be a shocker as in year 1 they are expected to know how to sit at a desk and concentrate quietly for 20 minutes at times. There’s very little by way of free play.

for most kids I would say that deferring reception would put them at a disadvantage because they miss out on that settling into school
routine period, and it’s really not common to defer the start so they will spent the rest of the school career being the odd one out (assuming your LA doesn’t just drop them into year 1). The only child I ever thought delaying would be good for was a summer born child with mild LD who would have really benefited from waiting a year - it the other summer born children soon settle in and are happy.

Sounds like a Normal kid to me . Yabu

@Endofdaysarehere are you a teacher? Your comments certainly aren’t representative of the schools I’ve taught at or the ones my DC attended. They weren’t expected to sit for extended lengths of time at all. I’m sorry if that’s been your experience 🤷‍♀️.

They start proper actual school in the September after their 5th birthday, into Y1. They start in Reception YR in the September after their 4th birthday. At least that's how it is done in our county.

What do you mean by 'CSA'?

honestly she will be fine at school she will be disciplined appropriatly and its all part of the learning process

CSA = compulsory school age.

Children legally do not have to start school (go into reception) until the term after their 5th birthday.

i.e that’s when school is compulsory by law.

@nevergoingback she will be disciplined appropriatly what!!