If you are energetic, positive and healthy in your 40s...what are your tips?

[Wisenotboring]

I'm approaching mid 40s and feel like I'm coming out of a bit of a fog of tiredness and life feeling a bit like hard work. I have a new job and am feeling more like my old self after a final baby and covid. I want to embrace the next stage and make good decisions to give myself the best chance of a healthy and enjoyable middle age. If you are feeling good what are your top tips for me!

@ThenJerico I started much older than you, I’m still rubbish but completed c25k and then did 10K - I’m very very slow, and was very fat to start with too. I prefer running alone as I’m so slo. I like it better outside, and I have the bone conducting headphones so that i can listen to the app and my music. Give it a go!

I’m 43 and have two young boys who keep me feeling lively! My tips would be: go out walking often, try new things (e.g. I’ve been doing art and music classes) and explore new places (both in your own area and, if you can, on holiday). One specific thing I do (which may or may not suit you), which I’ve been doing for 7 years, is taking one photo every day - sometimes it’s something exciting, other times just home things like the mess my kids have created. When I look back at my photo collection now I feel a real sense of achievement, like I’ve “lived”. And on days that would otherwise have been pretty boring, the need to have a photo so as not to miss a day in my collection has forced me into finding at least something interesting/memorable in the day. You could always try it for a couple of weeks and see how you go!

I think the advice here has been fab! I'm another advocate of HRT, it makes me feel so much better. Build positive habits, like daily exercise (even if it's just a quick walk). Have an objective look at your hair/clothes/makeup etc, and see if needs a bit of a refresh - not necessarily to look younger, but is there anything that isn't flattering you. I think trying to look younger can actually be quite aging, eg harsh hair colours. Try new things, learn a language, join a running club, etc.

I've had phases of feeling like that and my single best tip is

warning you won't like it

is completely - and I mean completely - give up alcohol.

It is a depressant and without it, you sleep better and are more cheerful. You look better as well - glowing skin. It takes about 4 weeks though to feel the effects and it really kicks in after about 6 - 8 weeks.

I've had long phases of not drinking but unfortunately I love red wine which is my downfall.

If I had the will power, I'd become teetotal as every time I've managed prolonged periods of not drinking I've been SO much happier in myself.

I changed jobs to a physically active one and feel fabulous!

I'm 53 and no dependent children now, which helps.
Two years ago I switched to a vegan whole foods diet and started brisk walking for 30 minutes each day including up hills.
I get as much fresh air as I can and sunbathe for short periods for vit D boost.
I take D3, B12 & collagen supplements and HRT (Which I wish I'd started in my peri menopausal 40s)
I drink only on nights out, so very rarely.
When I'm not working or doing something fun, I rest without any guilt, and get lots of sleep.
I spend time only with people I enjoy the company of. Which luckily includes my colleagues.
I try to only do things that are either essential, stimulating or fun.
I can honestly say, I've never looked or felt better.

Minimum alcohol, maximum yoga. Do the meditation bit at the end, it really works.

@ThenJerico Running/wobbly jogging is not kind to my pelvic floor. The tips I've heard are using grassy/softer surfaces more than pavements, flat surfaces are kinder than hills up or down, wearing well-cushioned shoes, reduce speed/stride, reduce distance (so if leaking happens when running X km, stop/slow down shorter than that), and ensuring there are lots of other types of exercise going on, particularly strength training and other types of mobility work that help build up without asking so much of the pelvic floor, but a physio will likely be able to give more specific tips for you.

For me, building back up after post-births and other health issues, working on increasing my stamina, speed, and comfort walking has done a lot for me plus things like Couch to Barbell/very beginner strength training. I find it easier to do with others, I even got into parkrun due to my running loving teenager. It has the negative for me that I do feel like I should be running as much as I can and sometimes I do try for better and worse, but I've realized that the people that I admire most are the people who are walking at speed comfortably. Being at the back of a route that is out and back, I see the fastest people on their way back and nearly all of them look uncomfortable, and then I see the speedy walkers at turning points, last time there one older guy who was checking his phone at one point and still going faster than my jog & looking effortless. I realized doing with other people not only encourages me to do it, but also helps me see where my goals (and the habits I need to get there) really lie.

Love this thread OP, thank you for starting it!

I turn 46 next week and feel as fit and healthy and positive as I did in my twenties - actually way more positive if i’m honest.

I have a very demanding full time job, regularly work 12 hour days - yet I am happy and content and grateful and energised. Some things that are crucial for me:

Mindset - For me it’s mainly about mindset, I am optimistic, practice gratitude daily (actually have a journal to write things into - it is life changing). If I wake up, my family is in good health, my country is not at war, and there is food in the fridge and water in the taps, I am already winning at life.

Running - like many here I run 2-3 times a week. The Nike Running app is a game changer - guided runs with their global running coach who talks you through and motivates you to run. You can have your music in parallel.

Being active - I play tennis once a week, go to pilates and once a week and have recently started adult ballet! I used to think i had to torture my body and was focussed on the outside.. Now I exercise for my mental health and heart health.

For anyone who says you can’t do this with small kids, I have an 8 year old. I get up early and exercise or I get my husband on parenting duty when I want to do classes or lessons.

Giving/serving - I’m always looking for ways to give back to the community, we run a Little Free Library from our house and have a neighbourhood WhatsApp group where we get together at least once a month and do a donation drive or work with a charity. I also look after numerous stray cat colonies with the help of strangers who have become friends. This gives me a sense of connection and community that feeds my soul and goes way beyond just the usual daily grind.

Meditation - I meditate whenever I can - sometimes just for 10 minute bursts - life changing n the way I respond to situations and giving me mental clarity.

Curiosity - I read a lot (watch zero tv) and use my commuting time to listen to podcasts - then I feel i am using what could be ‘dead time’ to learn and grown and be entertained. I’d be lost without my podcasts!

Vitamins - I take a range of vitamins to be at optimum level and get my bloods checked regularly.

Diet - I’ve been vegetarian for 33 years and feel great as a result - mostly vegan these days although Dairy Milk is my weakness.

Alcohol - as someone else said - you might not like this advice but I’ve been alcohol free for over 4 years and it is singlehandedly one of the most powerful things I’ve ever done. I have mental clarity and peace.

Caffeine - likewise I stopped the caffeine 3 years ago and it was like instant xanax. SO much more calm and centred. You can get great decaf coffee so I still have the taste with none of the hideous side effects - that I hadn’t even appreciated were impacting on me.

An amazing book on this by psychologist Shawn Achor is here: www.amazon.co.uk/Happiness-Advantage-Principles-Psychology-Performance/dp/0753539470

He’s also done Ted Talks, been on Oprah etc. So many practical tips and science based advice on how to live happy.

Super advice here, thank you everyone.

I do sadly think that reducing significantly or giving up alcohol is the number one piece of advice. It steals your energy, positivity, and resolve. For me, even one glass of red has me feeling fuzzy and taking the easy option the next day.

There is a song I love with this line in it that I listen to when I need a kick up the butt - 'don't take a free ride in your own life.'

I drink loads and am always full of beans and pretty cheery at 52 😃

lots of exercise, watch my diet (eat everything though, even carbs 😱🤣), try new things

Thanks for sharing all your strategies, it's so encouraging to hear some positive stories about how women in their 40s and beyond are able to keep up fitness and general life happiness. So sorry for the sad circumstances that have caused some to evaluate things.

Vitamin D and cocaine.

@Circleblue how did you get into Taoism if you don’t mind me asking? I’ve been really interested in it for a while but I can’t work out where to start

Some brilliant tips here, for those of you mentioning vitamins, which ones do you take and what impact do you feel they have had on you?

I've been prescribed Hux D3 20,000 UI (vitamin D3)
I take one tablet weekly. This is after a blood test showed I was vit D deficient.

I've been taking it for 3 weeks and am rejuvenated! I'm still tired but that's because I'm able to do stuff now, rather than being permanently exhausted and unable to do much other than go to work.

I also take a general daily multivitamin.

I take:
D3 (has stopped my winter blues)
B12 (plant based diet so to ensure no deficiency)
Cod liver oil (joints and skin)
Collagen (joints and skin)
Astaxanthin (skin. Its the substance salmon eat and the reason salmon is thought good for the skin)
Biotin (hair)
I eat 8/10 fruit & veg a day, so lots there too.
I don't know which of these works particularly or whether it's a combination, but my skin hair and nails are in excellent condition, much imoroved since i started the regime, and I have no aches and pains.

I’m another one who did couch to 5k and lost 5 stone. People tell me all the time I look 30’s. I started dressing better and got some balayage and the difference is astounding. People tell me I look like Jennifer Anniston now. I try not to eat carbs but mainly meat and vegetables.

I go out a lot with friends to local places, walk a lot; spend time in nature, have my hobbies. Keep my life full and chat to a lot of people

Which general daily vitamin would people recommend?

Intermittent Fasting is great for women as we age. It helps with rebalancing hormones and keeping blood sugar stable. It's not recommended if you have certain health conditions but I swear by it, I started it in Summer 2020 to shift the extra lockdown lbs and dropped a stone in 6 weeks.

I generally do 16:8 but I vary it as needed.

Look up Cynthia Thurlow on YouTube, she did some great TED talks on the topic and also has weekly podcast as well as having released a book earlier this year called "Intermittent Fasting Transformation"

What is 16:8 please @CaveMum . People talk about it and i never really understand how it works?

It’s just the amount of time you spend in a fasting state v non-fasting.

So 16:8 is 16 hours of fasting and an 8 hour eating window. I find it pretty easy to do, I usually stop eating around 8/8.30 each evening and then break my fast at about 1pm as that is what fits with my own schedule around work and kids.

You can do more or less, the main thing is that you fast for at least 12 hours, though there is evidence to suggest that 14 hours is the optimum. Putting your body into a fasted state means you burn fat stores for energy and also puts your cells into a state called autophagy which has known benefits.

When fasting you are allowed to drink as much water as you like as well as black tea/coffee.

It might sound hard, and I did struggle the first week or so, but you soon get into the rhythm and I usually don’t start actually feeling hungry until about an hour or so before the end of my fast.

Do you combine it with any other diet restrictions? I'm an accidental intermittent faster as I don't fancy food until lunch time. But I do restrict calorie intake, so can't know whether the IF side has any effect I'd be interested in knowing if it worked as the sole means of weight control?

I heard Dr Valter Longo (top researcher around fasting) on a podcast recently saying that it was looking like it was the calorie restriction that tends to happen when you IF that had the main health benefits rather than the length of time spent eating.

A lot of advocates of IF also advocate general healthy eating alongside it - lots of veg, healthy fats, quality protein, lowish carb and restrict sugar/processed food.

If you “dirty fast” (eat unhealthily during your feeding window) then you won’t see as many benefits.