If you are energetic, positive and healthy in your 40s...what are your tips?

[Wisenotboring]

I'm approaching mid 40s and feel like I'm coming out of a bit of a fog of tiredness and life feeling a bit like hard work. I have a new job and am feeling more like my old self after a final baby and covid. I want to embrace the next stage and make good decisions to give myself the best chance of a healthy and enjoyable middle age. If you are feeling good what are your top tips for me!

Don't drink, don't smoke, exercise doing something you enjoy, have a job which isn't too stressful and you enjoy, finish having children by the time you are 30 and marry someone decent who shares the load and loves you.

Oh, and very important, keep to a healthy weight and good diet,

given it's super hard to start a new habit and keep it up, use the Atomic Habits method to get new ones going

1. Aim for one minute only of any new habit daily (small small goals). if you just aim for this, you are likely to do more as it's about getting the habit going, not doing 10 mins then forgetting because it's a big commitment.
2. Ensure your environment is set up to achieve it (e.g. glasses of water around the house if your aim is to drink more water, running shoes out every night ready for the morning etc, no snacks in the house if you want to give up)
3. keep a visual log of your 1 minute achievement e.g. calendar with X's on. this reminds you to do it daily.

etc
Read the book or watch the guy's videos online - it's made a big difference to how I have implemented various positive habits.

Great thread - I am in the same boat … was staggering blinking out of the baby years after having DD mid 2018, then covid hit and well-being has been a bit shit generally.

What works for me

• really good supplements - I take Hardy’s Daily Essentials Micronutrients 2x a.m and p.m. Really helps general stress, sleeps and mind racing


• really moderating drinking - no more than 2x per week (it crept up to 5-6x in lockdown), no wine


• iron infusion once a year. I seem to be unable to store ferritin and this seems to help combat exhaustion. The anaesthesist (sp?) who did my C section put me into it. Game changer.


• exercise - running 3x week (very slowly!) but also making an effort to go for a walk at lunchtime on other days. If I don’t consciously make an effort to move I can easily do under 500 steps in a day 😳


• Setting boundaries, especially round work and prioritising the kids. I have a very busy/senior/full on job but it’s is professional/office based & I have autonomy over my diary. I carve out at least 1 school pick up and various assemblies etc. I’ve had jobs in organisations with a real presenteeism culture where I’ve not been able to do this and it made me feel like shit so I ruthlessly prioritise this. There is almost no meeting that is critical enough for me to cancel (I’m still learning this lesson but it’s always true).

@catpoppet Atomic Habits is such a great book. I felt so defeatist about getting back into running after years off and being so unfit and 10kg heavier than I was last time I was running. I found the goal “I need to get up at 6.15am and put on my running gear” so much more achievable than “I need to run 7km 3x a week”!!

Regular exercise, drinking plenty of water, journalling, limited social media and news, reading, taking little trips away (can just be a day trip to another town), catching up with friends for a meal/coffee, walking in nature, laughing every day.

Following with interest, great tips so far!

I find that running, weights, healthy diet, spending time outdoors, family time and regular socialing do wonders for my wellbeing. Unfortunately though, socialising means I drink too much and undo all of the good work. Whenever I've taken a break from the booze I feel like a new woman so I probably need to knock that on the head. Easier said than done!

I've also noticed that I'm slower at running and take longer to recover since I turned 40 (in the Autumn) so perhaps a trip to the GP is in order? How does one know that they are perimenopausal? My periods are regular and I have no other symptoms (apart from struggling to remember names).

Great thread OP 😊

Place marking

I had a baby - the running around involved with working full time kept me energised!

Am place marking
Need some tips

HRT.
Give up alcohol completely.
Meditation.
Couch to 5K.
Strength training.
Always be learning - eg, have a course on the go.
Yoga.

Low carb diet: better sleep, more energy, healthier, happier. Best thing I’ve ever done for my body.

Got rid of a bad husband. Ultimately you have to make sure that things in your life are worth keeping. Mine is now filled with parenting teenagers, a tough but rewarding full time job, two second jobs, a dog, friends, moving house, running, yoga, volunteering, so its tiring in a good way. But I have the energy and enthusiasm for it all, because I'm not wasting any on a bad marriage.

I wasted a lot of years trying to be better at drinking water and making lists before I realised this though.

My copy of Atomic Habits has arrived last night, and I’m off tomorrow, so I know what I’ll be doing on my day off :) Thanks for the recommendation!

Just looked up atomic habits and there is the audio book on YouTube will listen today. Thanks

Started setting boundaries for the first time ever, liberating!

Jogging, and proper weight training.

Running twice a week, yoga twice a week. Healthy breakfast of fruit granola and yogurt of a smoothie or toast and peanut butter, walking everywhere I can. And trying to eat salad with every meal. I still eat chocolate and crisps and alcohol but I balance it out

To everyone who’s recommended running, do you have any tips for an absolute beginner?

I’m 33, having physio to improve my pelvic floor (post baby) and also have quite ‘achy’ knees. Is running going to undo any pelvic floor strengthening?

Also, have you found it’s best to start jogging by yourself or to join a local group? Or to start on a treadmill then head outside when you’re a bit fitter?

The thought of pounding the pavements fills me with horror but it’s undeniably the one thing that so many people say really makes a difference, so I’d love to get into it if I can…!

Following on from the PP who left a bad marriage, I think working out what you actually want to spend your time and mental and emotional energy on is important. Two books that helped me are the Mark Williams mindfulness book and Four Thousand Weeks by Oliver Burkeman.

@ThenJerico i have always been a terrible runner - hated it, always last at cross country at school etc.

i tried running on the treadmill for years doing the Couch to 5km but still hated it.

About 5 years ago I did a couple of sessions with a running coach who basically told me to go very slowly and have breaks every couple of minutes - before you start gasping for breath. This helps you build a base over a period of weeks/months as you gradually reduce and eventually drop the walking breaks. It’s like couch to 5km but a bit more intuitive.

previously I would try to run, make it about 5 minutes, end up gasping and breathless and reconfirm my belief that I couldn’t run.

last year I built up to running 10km. (Very slowly). Then stopped. Now starting again but I can now do a 5-7km pre work - this was unheard of for me a few years ago.

Also get fitted for good running shoes.

This thread is so inspiring! Just what I need as feel as I am stuck in a mid-40’s slump and have lost who I actually am!

@bridgetreilly yes low carb diet here too, it seems to have reduced my random aches and pains too and I seldom feel tired except when I repeatedly stay up till 1am and the kids get us up at 6:30

60 now and have lots of energy and feel great.
As well as all the recommendations for exercise and supplements l suggest keeping up with your girlfriends. Maybe join one for exercise or plan a night away with a few. Going forward they can be a great support and good fun. Also take proper holidays not just a day here and there off work using them up like that. Take a good break and if you can afford it do something nice so refreshed going back.

Try to walk every day for at least half an hour just for pleasure. Talk to people I like. No headspace to those who I don’t. Accepting that we are all a work in progress.