AIBU to think parents should stop being put off a name because it's popular?

[GreatStuff67]

I feel like I've read a lot of posts recently where parents are trying to decide on a name for their baby but the name they like best is popular and so they're unsure about using it. When I was at school we had multiple kids with the same name (myself included) and no one seemed to care if they shared their name with anyone else. When did popular start being a bad thing for a name? Am I being a grumpy git or are other people thinking 'Who cares if it's a popular name. If you like it, use it!'?

Yeah I don't get it.
I've seen people say they dont want a name thats popular

One named her kid this 'unique' name that has since become really popular.

Made me laugh

I'm guessing a lot of them are people who were known as Sarah H or Louise T at school in order to differentiate from all the other Sarahs and Louises. Some people (you) don't care, others do. I would avoid names that have suddenly exploded in popularity (I'm bamboozled by the number of Margots I've met in the past two years) but I wouldn't go to the Boudicca end of the scale either.

YANBU.
DC1s name was top 5 the year they were born and DS was second most popular for years including the year he was born. It doesn’t bother me, DC1 we loved the name regardless of where it was popularity wise and DS is named after his grandad. I have a fairly unusual name and could never get things with my name on when I was a child so I have loved that they could. DC1 now uses a fairly unique non binary name however!

Speaking as someone who has literally never been in a school year or a workplace without sharing my name with another Lucy, I can see why you would want to avoid the Top 10.
Also my two best friends growing up - primary school and then secondary school - were also called Lucy.
It doesn't really matter but sometimes it'd be nice to be the only one around. I guess a lot of Daves and Toms also feel the same.

The trend for “unique” names is quite embarrassing. Some of them are barely names, some of them will cause years of irritated children then adults having to explain how to spell because of a stupid “unique” spelling.

I don't think people are actually avoiding these names in real life though or the top 10 names wouldn't remain so fairly static over the past decade or so.

I'd rather a popular name personally than some of the absolute nonsense names I see now

No, I’m glad I’ve never shared my name with someone else I knew and DS hasn’t either (as far as I know).

Your name is a big part of your identity and with so many names or potential names to chose from I think it’s a shame that people share the same few names.

I’m not into unique spellings but some people are swayed too much by the current ‘trendy’ names.

YABU. There are so many people of around my age with my name, it's annoying. My mum didn't realise how much it was blowing up the year she chose it. There's thousands of names that are not in the top ten but are not at all "super-unique" either. If I really loved one I wouldn't let that put me off but I do think that Ava, Isabella, Freya are going to date the way Mavis, Pearl, Gloria/ Sharon, Tracy, Sue now have, and having had one of those names I would rather not do that to my kid.

If someones asks for opinions on names, people will respond. Knowing that a name is popular is just information. Like knowing a name means something rude in a foreign language, or that name you like along with you existing child is the name of couple in popular series you don't watch, or a serial killer has that name. Doesn't mean that you can't use the name anyway if it doesn't bother you, but knowledge isn't a bad thing.

I will post and say a name is popular, because I lot of people genuinely have no idea what is popular. The number of post I've seen saying things like 'I used Oliver twenty years ago when it was very rare' and I read it thinking 'it was in the top ten!' A lot of people seem to assume that name trends haven't moved since they were in school and that Arlo, Luca, Willow and Luna are unusual, when they are in fact popular.

^ perfectly put

Hmm as someone with a very popular name of my generation (actually 5/25 of us with the same name in my form at school) I really hated having the same name as everyone else, always having to use my surname etc. So when it came to naming my own dc I did try to pick names that were unlikely to make the top 10 - but that we still loved and that are ‘proper’ names.

I love that names are so much more diverse nowadays and there is so much choice - nearly every child at my dcs’ school has a unique name as in there are no repeats in the whole (small) school. It also means that names just aren’t a thing they tease each other over as they all have different names.

My ds is called Thomas - so obviously I agree!

In his squad at swimming there's 15 swimmers. 5 are called Thomas 🤣🤣🤣

But it's a fab name (imo)

It depends. When I was expecting our first, i sat at work with 3 other people in a bay. They each had a daughter with my favourite girl's name, that put me off.
My favourite boys name was used by my best friend (I was his godmother), another friend, a couple of colleagues and a client, all while I was pregnant. So I make no apologies for choosing different names (especially as we have a surname like Smith).

Hah. I was the kid who's parents had the common names so I had the 'wacky' one. I do love it but my god just once I'd like not to have to say/spell it.

My kids have usual (top 20) names. Which I love but I tend not to love too out there names in any event because of my experience.

I used to think this. But then I came across a thread a few days ago where the op asked what names people would have chosen for themselves. I’d say at least 80% of the names people came up with were completely batshit, they’d have definitely been slagged off on here if they said they were naming their baby that, hardly anyone wanted a ‘normal’ name for themselves.

Personally, I'd avoid popular names as I had a popular name and wished it was more unusual. Other people with popular names see it as positive or neutral. Everyone is different.

In general people are moving away from popular names though. In 1996 22% of babies were given a top ten name. In 2020 it was 10%.

I do get sick of the false equivalence that people aren't using popular names, they must be using ridiculous names. Like there isn't a wealth of names which are less popular, but also nice names. It really isn't a choice between George or Giraffe.

To clarify, I'm not against a wider range of names. I just don't understand why some parents don't use a name they really love purely because 'too many' other children have it, or when parents are really disappointed to find out their unique and special name was picked by other parents too. To me, a lovely name is a lovely name, regardless of how many other children/people have it. 🤷

Personally I thought would never have been bothered about a name being popular, but I do get it now.

I had names in mind that I always thought were really beautiful, and now they are all in the top 10 names they've just lost their shine. Overexposure, I guess.

I don't strive for unique names but a name being REALLY common does put me off.

I agree with you.

Whenever baby names are mentioned or discussed there is one thing I state, and that is a plea to use the traditional spelling, so that a child is not faced with a lifetime of having to correct others, or face name calling or worse.

I have a common name snd I HATED that there was always at least one other girl in my class who shared it. I went to a coffee morning the other day and yep three out of ten of us shared my name.
So when it came to my own kids I picked names that were very uncommon but normal (not like Apple or Moon, just regular names). My daughter is pleased she is the only girl in her whole school with her name, though still has a little squeal of delight when someone with her name is a character on a tv show or book. My son the same (we actually got his name from the son in a Tom Hanks movie).
So I quite agree with not picking the popular names of the time. However I'm totally against weird spellings.

Agree 100%

I think it depends how much you like the name. I had my daughters name since the age of 12 and when I had her it suddenly became very popular but that didn’t deter me.

my husband picked the name of our second daughter . I wasn’t keen on it because it was popular lol

Whilst in no way unique or unusual I chose names that weren't top 100 and all three have gone on to be top ten. Eldest grown up DC is called Oliver... You never know what fashions will bring.

I find it odd that people care. I have a very common name and irs never bothered me and if anything the nicknames I’ve had to differentiate have been more unique than most names.