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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to think parents should stop being put off a name because it's popular?

105 replies

GreatStuff67 · 31/05/2022 19:56

I feel like I've read a lot of posts recently where parents are trying to decide on a name for their baby but the name they like best is popular and so they're unsure about using it. When I was at school we had multiple kids with the same name (myself included) and no one seemed to care if they shared their name with anyone else. When did popular start being a bad thing for a name? Am I being a grumpy git or are other people thinking 'Who cares if it's a popular name. If you like it, use it!'?

OP posts:

momtoboys · 31/05/2022 22:02

My DH and I mostly agreed on names for all of our boys. Except one. We have two sets of twins. The last boy to be named from the last set I had my heart set on one name and he had another. I didn't detest his choice of name but there were so many of boys with the same name in our town that it seemed ridiculous.

BrylcreamBeret · 31/05/2022 22:06

Doesn't bother me for my kids to have a common name at all Op, but my Jaidon is hyphenated with Jole so it's not as common as you'd think. Its no different than all the Laura/Lori/Laurens of the 90s.

Goldenbear · 31/05/2022 22:07

I think people have always been keen to give their children names that are not popular. I am early 40s and my parents were very keen on Verity and Lara, they weren't overly used then. My brother was going to be a Damien/Wilfred or Dylan.

MsTSwift · 31/05/2022 22:08

And yes it’s not a choice between Amelia or Moon Unit 🙄. There are lots of perfectly nice underused “normal names” say Miranda/Zoe/Susannah/Mary/Hester so booored of Eve Lily Isabel Sophie Grace yawn.

AlistairCamel · 31/05/2022 22:08

I’ve never not used a name because it’s popular but just don’t like any of the popular names particularly and I think part of that is because they are so popular. I’m not even sure that makes sense.

My three children have names that are traditional but under used names typically. One has a slightly odd spelling which people possibly think we made up (it’s a letter different from standard) but that is because the spelling we have used is native to somewhere a grandparent is from.

carefullycourageous · 31/05/2022 22:09

I think YABU - parents should use whatever criteria they want to choose a name.

I personally have a name that is well known and has been consistently used throughout history but I never had another in my year with the same name and I liked that.

I deliberately avoided names in the top ten, but I have friends who have given all their kids top ten names, everyone is different.

comealongponds · 31/05/2022 22:10

YABU

People have different priorities when naming their child, for some popularity is one of them. It clearly isn’t for everyone as the popular names still get used.

it’s also worth remembering that far less children have the most popular names now compared to the most popular names a few decades ago. So even the number 1 name is unlikely to have 5 in one class anymore.

pinkstripeycat · 31/05/2022 22:10

DH named DS2. DS2 name was popular in our home town but not in the army town we lived.
I told DH I didn’t want the name (altho did like it) as DS2 would be one of so many if we moved back. We did move back.
As it happens there is only 1 other boy out of 210 boys in his year (it’s a boys only school) with DS2 name. It’s a really common name and it’s common worldwide!

HobnobsChoice · 31/05/2022 22:13

At school it was all Claire Rachel and Sarah. And it felt like every girl born between about 1978 and 1983 has Louise as a middle name. I now work with three Helens, 2 Claires, two Michaels three Pauls (and two are Paul S) and it sometimes feels like the Janes are multiplying exponentially. I like being the only Hobnob. I have gone out for dinner with a group of 9 people and 4 of the 5 men are called Andy. I had a well known but not madly popular name and I was the only one in school and have only once shared my name in the work place. My children also have known but less frequent names.

CupidStunt22 · 31/05/2022 22:17

To me, a lovely name is a lovely name, regardless of how many other children/people have it

Good for you. To me a lovely name is much less lovely when there are 10 of them in the year group. Not sure if you're aware, but people have different ideas on things. What business is it of yours how other people choose names?

Maroon85 · 31/05/2022 22:17

My name is in no way unique, but there's not loads of us. I am so grateful not to have a really common name especially as both my maiden name and married name are really common. Where I work, 80% of the female staff have one of 3 names and I'd absolutely hate that.

I was therefore determined not to give my child a name in the top 50. They're not younique names, and are normal. But I very much doubt there'll be another child with the same name in their school

Peccary · 31/05/2022 22:19

DD's name is more popular in France with a slightly different spelling, she likes that she can get things with her "French" name on when we go there

ClinkeyMonkey · 31/05/2022 22:21

My 2 DC have names that have been popular forever - they are classics and always at the top or close to the top of the annual list. They are family names, so special to us. But neither of them have ever been in a class with a child of the same name. They are both great names. Shame to overlook them if I like them, just because other people happen to like them too!

WibblyWobblyLane · 31/05/2022 22:46

I agree. When choosing DD's name, we fell in love with it and it felt right, and when we went to sign the paperwork it was only then from a poster they had on the wall of the current top 10, that I noticed it was the current number 1 name. But you know what, it is her name, so I didn't want to change it. Zero regrets.

Stevienickssnickers · 31/05/2022 23:02

There were 4 of us with the same name in my form. 3 of us used surnames in addition to our first names but sadly the other girl was referred to as "Ginger Sarah". DH was also one of several with the same name. His uni group of friends contained 3 X Dave, 3 X Steve/Stephen, 2 x Matt and 2 x Ian.

DS has an unusual name. He wears it well.

TheOriginalEmu · 31/05/2022 23:07

I avoided top 10 names. I didn’t want my child to be one of 6 in his/her year. I have a name that was not popular when I was young, and I liked being a bit different. It is very popular now though.
but most of the top 10 names were not names I particularly cared for anyway, if it was something I loved then I’d probably have used it anyway.

jcyclops · 31/05/2022 23:16

I don't think it is a problem picking a popular name, but I do sometimes wonder if the trend with names is increasingly for a few to be very, very popular, and many to be rare and almost unique.

My first name was in the top 5 for the year I was born, but in my year at secondary school (about 270 kids) there was only one other with the same name and we were never in the same class. In my class, no girls shared a name but two boys had the same name as each other, but I don't recall it ever being a problem.

PS. I can't actually remember one of the boys first names (it was many, many years ago!). He was universally known by a nickname - even by some teachers.

Maybebabyno2 · 01/06/2022 03:58

My name isn't unique but wasn't popular when I was born. I had only ever met one or two others with my name before.

When I had dc I picked a name I love but it was a top 50 name. When he started at nursery, there were a couple of boys with his name. One he became friendly with and I started talking to his mum.

Not only do the boys share a name, but we mums do too! And there are at least two other mums with my name at the nursery AND the lady who runs the room has the same name too!

RenegadeMatron · 01/06/2022 04:16

YABU. Top 10 names are ubiquitous and yawnsome.

We weren’t in the situation of liking a popular name and dithering over using it. We just didn’t like any of them.

The overly popular names of now, will be tired and dated in another 20 years.

I’m glad I’m not yet another Jennifer, Karen, Joanne, Sarah, Nicola or Michelle.

And as lots of others have pointed out, there’s a vast swathe of lovely, under-used names between top 10 snooze-fests, and cobbled-together, unique monstrosities. It’s not either / or.

itssquidstella · 01/06/2022 04:37

From the age of 15 I was set on giving any future DS the name Oscar. At that point it was ranked 90 and I'd never met a real life one.

I’ve just had a baby boy and one of the reasons he isn't called Oscar is that the name has rocketed so much in popularity over the last 20 years. It just took some of the shine from the name for me: one of the reasons I liked it initially was that it felt slightly unusual but was still a very established name.

DS has a name which is currently ranked 392 and has climbed quite steeply in the last few years, so it's unusual but not in the 'yooneek' category.

Darbs76 · 01/06/2022 04:43

I’m sure kids would rather have a popular name (aka nice name hence it’s popular) rather than a ‘unique’ name (aka not nice hence it’s not popular)

CeeJay81 · 01/06/2022 05:14

My dds name is just outside the top 100(has been more popular in the past), is a well known international name and she is the only one in her school. There is a slightly similar name that's really popular these days but she's only once been called it by mistake. I do like that name too but decided out of the 2 to go with the less popular one.

DC1214 · 01/06/2022 05:47

Jonah? I always liked that!

IglesiasPiggl · 01/06/2022 05:48

I think it's an aspect to consider when choosing a name, especially if you also have a common surname. It doesn't have to be the primary factor but I do think it's nicer in life not to be always in places where there is another person of the same name. My DS has a name that shot into the top ten about six years after he was born. I am pleased that his school and uni years won't be flooded with boys of the same name, I don't think it's as important in the workplace etc, where there will be lots.

DC1214 · 01/06/2022 05:51

easyday · 31/05/2022 20:34

I have a common name snd I HATED that there was always at least one other girl in my class who shared it. I went to a coffee morning the other day and yep three out of ten of us shared my name.
So when it came to my own kids I picked names that were very uncommon but normal (not like Apple or Moon, just regular names). My daughter is pleased she is the only girl in her whole school with her name, though still has a little squeal of delight when someone with her name is a character on a tv show or book. My son the same (we actually got his name from the son in a Tom Hanks movie).
So I quite agree with not picking the popular names of the time. However I'm totally against weird spellings.

That was in response to easyday BTW

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