15 shirts a week

[theonlygirl]

DS2 starts big school in September, meaning there will be 15 shirts in the laundry each week. DH 5, DS1 5, DS2 5.
no issue washing and drying them but it will be a cold day in hell before I stand ironing their shirts. I don't use a tumbledryer so they all definitely need ironing.

Option 1 - make them iron their own.
Option 2 - drycleaners

Curious to know what others do

@Quincythequince

dread to think what you think constitutes a healthy lunchbox. You must spend all your time thinking about your kids, what they’re eating for every meal, the cleanliness of their uniforms, making their lives easier for them. When do you think about you and what you want and need?

I can tell you what a healthy lunchbox if you like?

I spend as much time as is needed thinking about my kids, but they’re older now and so my burden is lessened a little for sure. Standard food shop delivered with everything needed in it, and good habits have been instilled.

The uniforms are washed and cleaned as needed of course and none of this is gold star parenting either btw! Just Basic parental provision IMO.

I also spend as much time as is needed on me, and manage to fit it all in.

Could probably do with a cleaner to be honest, and am thinking about that.

I could of course just make my kids do it because I don’t want to, but somehow that doesn’t feel right, when we all have other tasks we do.

No iron shirts, shake them out thoroughly after a wash and spin cycle, then dry outside on hangers.

Haven't ironed a shirt in years.

Really doesn’t take that long to prepare a healthy cooked breakfast.

Yes, teens can prepare most of that - the question is, will they? The answer is, no.

So you then have to supermarket Dorito Coke Zero lot (bloody dire) because they do get hungry and will eat, and the daily coco pops lot; better but not great.

I think good nutrition is very much worth the little time it takes to provide.You do realise you can cook up two packets of bacon, store in a tub and then have a bacon sandwich ready and on the table in not much more time than it takes to have toast and jam.

And my kids will often pull that together too.

@Quincythequince

fresh clean uniform every single day and a breakfast prepared for you every day is not the experience of most teens, it is beyond standard parenting. And guess what as well? Those teens are ok!

and yeah go on, tell me what a healthy lunchbox looks like?

Really doesn’t take that long to prepare a healthy cooked breakfast.

Maybe not, but it's not a necessity either. Millions of healthy people the world over go to work and school on cereal, toast and jam, bread and cheese etc.

Yes, teens can prepare most of that - the question is, will they? The answer is, no.

And? I'm 32 and I've only ever had a cooked breakfast on weekends or maybe if it was my birthday on a school day. Even as an adult I never cook myself breakfast on work days - I seem to manage just fine on toast!

I never said I prepared breakfast every day.
I just said I didn’t expect them to do it every day either.

And yes, for reasons mentioned above, I prefer they eat to reduce junk consumption.

It’s not even an option for them given school transport and food availability here tbf.

They have shirts ready to go on a Monday and a wash is done midweek too. But they all do a lot of sport in and out of school, so that’s what needs managing tbh.

I do not think what I’m doing is beyond standard parenting at all. Why on earth would you think that? And tbf, the child in the OP is 11, not a teen.

And no, obesity and MH stats would indicate that many of those teens, are not ok. I work in the field of obesity and it is bloody shocking and sad and it starts at home.

I won’t bore you with the lunches, it’s not that interesting tbh, but my youngest is a strict vegetarian and a dairy avoider, so it requires thought to be balanced.

Don’t understand the posters who on the one hand are saying DC ‘s need to do life skill chores such as ironing their shirts but the same DC’s wouldn’t bother to cook egg or beans for breakfast, are they not life skills?

It is my responsibility to meet my DC’s basic needs and that includes ensuring my DC’s have clean clothes, healthy food to eat, a clean bed to sleep in etc. Yes they can all help out and learn how to become self sufficient but they all learn at a different pace and meanwhile it’s still my responsibility.

So if I have to take an extra 5 minutes over breakfast or an extra 15 minutes ironing then so be it. I’m setting a good example, I’m teaching them that when they need to do it themselves this is how it’s done.

Does anyone genuinely think kids need a cooked breakfast everyday?

Don’t understand the posters who on the one hand are saying DC ‘s need to do life skill chores such as ironing their shirts but the same DC’s wouldn’t bother to cook egg or beans for breakfast, are they not life skills?

I don't think cooking hot food in the morning is a life skill, no.

Cooking in general is, of course, but nobody needs to cook a hot breakfast in the morning. There are loads of other options for breakfast that don't involve cooking - cereal, fruit and yoghurt, toast, porridge or loads of other non-standard food options like sandwiches etc.

Why would cooking beans for breakfast be a life skill?

Don’t understand the posters who on the one hand are saying DC ‘s need to do life skill chores such as ironing their shirts but the same DC’s wouldn’t bother to cook egg or beans for breakfast, are they not life skills?

Its not about the life skills, it the assigning them daily and handing over responsibility.

Please don’t start insisting teens and pre-teens just because they can physically undertake a task, will always do it well, and willl always make the right choices and need no guidance at all.

Who said they did?
Has anybody said that?

I don’t think so.

A nutritious breakfast most days
though, yes.

@dustandroses

yeah but cooking eggs or beans for breakfast isn’t a necessity is it?

ive never had egg or beans for breakfast in my life and I’m fine! As is the case for many, many people I would suspect.

How is a clean uniform every day and a prepared breakfast beyond standard parenting?

Iron DP's (or get him to do them) so he looks smart for the office. Don't bother with the kids?

To be honest I lost you at the thought of sending kids shirts to the dry cleaners! If it's even possible to consider affording to pay for that then I have little sympathy. Either iron them yourself or pay someone else to do so. What a first world problem!

Sorry to the OP I
quoted here.
That wasn’t meant for you. I do in fact agree with you.

Nobody said it was a necessity.
It’s one option from a list of healthier options than cereal/milk, or the dreaded Doritos/coke (which someone else mentioned).

Providing clean clothes and food is not OTT parenting, it’s the bare minimum quite frankly.

Because at some point, you need to get your children used to doing these things for themselves, in preparation for them going to university and moving out.

I read so many threads on here from parents of young adults who still cook them breakfast, do their laundry, wake them up for college or work and I just don't understand why. You're not doing your children any favours by doing everything for them.

Iron their shirts for goodness sake. I have three sons and a husband so we're five more shirts than you, not that I have ever thought about counting them in my life before!!
If your partner is willing/able to do some then that's great, but if the ironing falls to you as part of the dissemination of chores then hey ho. What an odd post!

But you can provide the food and the washing machine without doing all the washing and meal prep for them.

I don't iron shirts.

DH either irons his own or doesn't bother.

Yes, of course. But when did households start being households with everyone doing their own thing.

What sense does that make? 3 kids all preparing breakfast every weekday morning in the kitchen, just because ‘you will learn’

Makes no sense at all. Why not one skilled person ensuring a good quality version all round, where possible.

Yes you need to prep them, but I’m line with a lot of the rationale above, I think it seems that many on here go 🤷🏼‍♀️ It’s Up to you now.

And so many British teens look, smell (from the sounds of it) and behave in line with that parenting stance.

Not good at all.

Days are long, years are short.

Clean wearable clothes and food IS
basic provision and even teachers and social workers would agree with that.

@Quincythequince

clean wearable clothes - yes of course, a fresh clean shirt every single day - unnecessary. Like these people who give their kids a fresh pair of pyjamas every single night. Totally unnecessary

Yes. And you make a big mistake if you think they will make good choices as often as is recommended for food health.

They won’t. They’re teens - they push back and try to get out of things, it’s what they do.

Am on my number three in the throes of teens on now and he’s behaving like my other two, as will his younger brother.

Just iron’s your kids clothes when they’re little, and make sure they eat well.

To wilfully ignore the latter and hope it turns out for the best IS neglectful behaviour.

We have a nation of sick kids, and it’s getting worse.

Exactly but how will that child learn if providing clean clothes and a breakfast is beyond standard parenting? How young were you when your parents said there’s food in the cupboard and there’s the washing machine. Crack on and work it out for yourself? How did you know what to do? I suspect you were taught by example and / or being shown and it happened gradually.

My post was about teaching DC’s to become independent, not passing the responsibility to them.