To think this is absolutely disgusting or am I missing something?

[veralera]

I met my brothers new girlfriend last night. To be perfectly honest, I wasn't too keen. Something about her seemed off to me but I never get too involved in his relationships anyway. I put it down to maybe nerves etc but I just didn't get a good vibe from her.

Anyway to my surprise, she sent me an Instagram follow request which I accepted and returned as I'm thinking is a nice gesture from her.

I was scrolling through her pictures and I came across this one of her ex boyfriend and her child.s The ex boyfriend is not the sons father.

The ex boyfriend is holding the child (I'm unsure of how old he is, maybe 5ish) in one arm and holding a cup in the other.

The cup says 'I LOVE ANAL'

He is holding up the cup with the child and they are both smiling at the camera.

Am I wrong to find this massively disturbing? I just don't get it. Am I missing something?

All I can see is a man holding a child not belonging to him along with a sexual reference.

If I'm over reacting or missing something then please tell me. I'm very close to my brother and I know he really want us to get on. I will try regardless but something just sits un easy with me.

Just to add, my brother isn't on social media at all so he will not have seen this picture.

Complete overreaction if you ask me! It was a stupid mug ffs!! You sound interfering and if you were my sibling you would be getting told to mind your own business.

It's really none of your business.
He's going to date who he wants to date.

If there's been an abusive childhood, he likely needs therapy

I agree

Who's mug is it? Who loves the anal?

It’s available on Amazon Prime

It’s available on Amazon Prime

This thread??

www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2837849-To-think-Paperchase-have-lost-their-minds-over-cock-and-anal-cards

Agree!

You're looking to discredit the woman OP! I sincerely hope she's gone through your SM and finds something to discuss with your DB about you!

I mean the cup itself is fine. I feel like as a society we should really stop demonising sex. Messed up to hold it next to a child though. Grim. If you get it in the photo by accident then don’t post it on social media. Ugh.

Get to know her. Maybe she has behaved like an idiot in past relationships (man in photo) but that doesn’t mean that she isn’t a good person.

fwiw it sounds vile.

Crass, stupid and tasteless.

Men have longer to mess up in life and mess around with women because they don't lose the ability to have children as soon as us. They can settle down later.

This woman sounds dim at the very least and irresponsible at worst.

I find that picture vile.

the real point of this post is you seeking permission from a wider audience to sabotage your brothers relationship under the guise of 'caring'. It's not up to you to approve it's his choice, just because it appears it's a bad one is neither here nor there. At the end of the day its a tasteless picture that she thought was funny enough to post that's it

Well said @Laurajane1987 , I think you've stated the issue very clearly.

Well it's not great. It's actually really pretty grim.

But ... it's also none of your business who your brother dates and what her (appalling) taste is in mugs, unfortunately.

Girl? Patronising much, woman

Potentially both the photo and the videos are based around the fact that the child can't read. OP says the mug was held up 'with the child', which may mean that the child being there was part of the joke, like with the spaghetti. I'm not saying they're identical. I'm saying they're both jokes.

It is creepy.
Is there a caption underneath the picture or just the picture alone?

Totally confused by the Replies here. Even if it definitely says analog maybe he just didn’t notice. I have a few cups with stupid or rude stuff written on them. One could easily end up in a photo. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Definitely say anal is what I meant to say

@Omega33 alright hun don't get your knickers in a twist it's just a word.

The photo wouldn't impress me either OP but I get the sense you don't think she's good enough for your brother and you're looking for this or something to be able to use against her. It won't work anyway if he is smitten. You're gonna have to see how things develop. You only met her once, she seems uninterested, but if I met my siblings new girlfriend for the first time and she was all over my family like a rash I'd think that was weird.

I would imagine the 'joke' may be along the lines that his preference wouldn't result in a baby. But I agree, very inappropriate and poor taste.

It's too much of a tiny snapshot of that moment for me to have a strong view.
I wouldn't like it but I wouldn't be freaked out about it.

Nice if people can agree that there actually are nice men & bad women out there. Bit of relief from the relentless misandry on MN.