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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To want to take kids on holiday DP says no

65 replies

Dowhatdowullywup · 26/05/2022 13:42

Not so much AIBU but am I being bonkers 😂..

Dc are 2 yrs old and 6 months both pandemic babies. I thought it would be nice to go away maybe mallorca this summer now things are opening up.

Dp says I am romanticising the idea and it will just be parenting elsewhere without all our stuff, in the heat, kids unsettled from routine, they are too young to appreciate it etc

AIBU to feel a bit disappointed? Anyone have any experience with going abroad with kids this young and was it hell or was it great!?!

OP posts:

Plumbella · 26/05/2022 13:47

I took my 16 month old to Spain at the beginning of the month and he loved it. He was really good on the plane both ways, good travelling, loved swimming, the parks and he genuinely just liked being in his prams on walks looking around. I'd 100% do it again but I also agree with your dp it was a very different holiday than we're used to.

adlitem · 26/05/2022 13:48

Well, he is to an extent right. Holidays like that aren't anywhere near the same as without kids, so depends whether you would enjoy it and how easy going your kids are (with food, sleep, change in routine, water etc).
We've always travelled loads and have not ever let small kids stop us. We were in Greece when DC were 3 and 9 months (so similar ages) - to make it easier we got an all inclusive hotel with kids club and snacks available all day. DD was happy at kids club, DS not so there wasn't much down time except for naps. The flight and lack of sleep was rubbish/ more difficult than home for sure. But no cooking, cleaning etc to be done, and lots of time spent playing at the pool/ beach/ in the kids areas so all in all it was enjoyed by all.

Fairislefandango · 26/05/2022 13:49

We went on holiday (sometimes abroad, sometimes not) with ours since they were tiny. We always had a great time. I might choose somewhere a bit less hot though tbh. Small children used to the weather in the Britsish Isles don't always tolerate the heat very well.

Babdoc · 26/05/2022 13:56

I just holidayed in the UK until the DC were 4 and 5 years old, and were more manageable, as I was on my own with them. Plus MIL and FIL wanted to have us to stay, and we were all grieving DH’s death, so it made sense to stay at their lovely home in a tourist area of England.
I think holidays are much more fun once you are past the baby stage - the DC love trying out new languages and exotic food, and learn so much visiting Greek and Roman ruins, caves, wildlife sanctuaries etc. Plus one is less anxious about pools, the sea and water parks once they are strong swimmers.

Franca123 · 26/05/2022 13:57

We went on a UK holiday with kids that age and had a nice time. We've not attempted abroad yet.

Etinoxaurus · 26/05/2022 13:58

Holidayed and travelled abroad from a few weeks old with dc. But not hot.

MagicTurtle · 26/05/2022 13:59

Personally I agree with your DH. I'm not saying you're wrong - I found holidays with tiny ones quite stressful, but maybe you won't!

JanisMoplin · 26/05/2022 14:00

I did long haul holidays with my kids at that age to Asia. Personally I didn't want to wait till they were bigger. Hard work but better than sitting at home. Prepared ahead of time.

SometimesMaybe · 26/05/2022 14:07

We took our kids on holiday from a few months old. It was nothing like our pre-child holidays but was still worth it. I love going abroad on holiday so I wasn’t going to stop because I had children (or because children don’t “need” to go abroad on holiday - of course they don’t need to go on holiday but I want to).

We did lots of different things and scaled down our expectations- not much city breaks and I found that self catering was the same shit in a different place so we tended to go to hotels and did a few all all inclusive.
At age 2 your oldest would absolutely love a splash park with little slides.

I would totally go for the guaranteed heat abroad rather than a wet week on the coast somewhere in the Uk m

purplemunkey · 26/05/2022 14:18

I’m kind of with your DH. The first hol we had with DC they were 18m. I’d say it was 30% fun, 70% pain in the arse - pretty much due to the reasons your DH suggests. The next year was much better, so 2.5yrs, and then after that it’s been all good. Based on my experience I wouldn’t want to do it with a 6m & 2yr old - but all kids (and parents) are different.

NamechangeFML · 26/05/2022 14:35

Well yous wont knwo until you try? Is dh not going to go on holiday for the next 18 years then? Lol
im taking my DC ( 18 months) at the end if the Summer , but Granny is coming with us a: to get a bit of sun,herself! B: help out with the baby c : spend precious time with baby!
is that an option? Theyre only little once.
no it wont be a " drinkinf from the morning watchinf football karaoke "holiday, but imagine them on the beach building sandcastles!
and tbh, id given the choice of dealing with a whiney baby or rain- id choose to be with whiney baby, sleep deprived, in the sun!

whoruntheworldgirls · 26/05/2022 14:42

I only have 1 but have been taking her abroad since she was 9m old and the holidays have been great, she's always adjusted well to the time/heat and has had a great time

ChiselandBits · 26/05/2022 14:42

We took our two on a self catering beach holiday at 10 weeks and 2yo. It was great. The apartment was ground floor with a shady balcony but right near the pool so we could take turns to be splashing about with the older one or minding the little one, we ate dinner out, wandered around with littlest in the buggy. Made a nice change of scenery. But, fair bit of planning to ensure it went smoothly. Careful packing, used steriliser bags for the bottles, took the formula with us, that sort of thing.

Greentime101 · 26/05/2022 14:48

He’s not wrong but if you are prepared & want a change of scenery it will be worth it

BrunoMadrigal · 26/05/2022 14:50

We went abroad when DS was 11 months old to a hot country. He absolutely loved it. He was full of joy the entire time we were there and very chill and cooperative. He could obviously tell we were somewhere new and he enjoyed it.

So definitely nothing wrong with going abroad with babies!

hellcatspanglelalala · 26/05/2022 14:52

I wouldn't have taken two babies abroad tbh, we took ours but they were four years apart.

Watermill · 26/05/2022 14:53

I did it with mine - always stayed in self catering apartments. Really enjoyed it.

If he doesn't want to go can you go with a friend or family member?

Triffid1 · 26/05/2022 14:55

It depends on 1. How flexible your DC are and 2. what you expect from a holiday.

If you want to be having long lie ins, hanging out by the pool all day then long boozy dinners, no, going on holiday with the DC will not be much fun. But if your expectations are more realistic and your children are relatively flexible, the benefits of not having to worry about cooking/cleaning/shopping etc are huge.

We took DS away both short and long haul when he was pretty young and it was great. But it was NOT at all the sort of holiday we'd enjoyed before. When he was 2 we went to CentreParcs and it still is fondly remembered by me and DH as one our best ever holidays. Yes, we mostly did the same things we did at home but without having to do endless chores, without having to drive everywhere etc etc. It was all just chilled out and relaxed and that was so needed as DS was a difficult baby.

MarvellousMay · 26/05/2022 14:57

Tbh it’s only a holiday if you take it in turns to look after the DC and then each get a bit of a break. Otherwise your DP is right, it’s just doing all the same parenting but without the luxury of all your stuff and in the heat. I can’t say I particularly enjoyed it when my DC were little.

SAH07 · 26/05/2022 14:59

My first baby was 9 weeks old when we went to tenerife. It was fine, lots of planning but at that age they don't know where they are. Ideal time to enjoy the cheaper school time holidays. We stuck with all inclusive type hotels until they were much older. They enjoyed splashing in the pool and had lots of naps in their buggies whilst we enjoyed walks or meals. It's a different holiday, its not very relaxing but it's a change of scenery, warm weather and different food

Ponderingwindow · 26/05/2022 15:02

I agree with your Dh.

our travel attempts with young DD were awful and not remotely relaxing.

she reacted extremely poorly to the change in routine.

BlackandBlueBird · 26/05/2022 15:03

I love holidays with the DC and always have so I’m on your side with this one! I know a lot of people find them incredibly stressful though.

Mallorca would be perfect - they will definitely enjoy splashing in the pool/sea, digging in the sand, ice creams for the toddler… You might want to go for September though if possible as it will be less busy, less expensive and less hot (the one thing my kids do struggle with on holiday is the heat, it’s fine because we are aware of it but it was a shock the first time!)

ChunkyKitKat82 · 26/05/2022 15:04

Bloody love our holidays abroad with the kids. Took both when they were 4 months old, and now at 12 and 14 they are just as excited about each holiday as us.

MajesticallyAwkward · 26/05/2022 15:05

Your DH is right in that it's just parenting somewhere else without all of your stuff. But it can still be enjoyable as long as you go in with realistic expectations.

I'm taking my 6yo and 2yo abroad soon and I'm fully aware that there will be no lying on a sun bed, day drinking, lie ins or relaxing. They will still get up at 6am, they will want entertaining all day so I've booked somewhere with lots to do for both of them (and a kids club for the 6yo!), lovely lodge with hot tub so I can get a bottle of wine and sit in it when the kids fall asleep and fully expect to be on the go all day every day we are there. The 2yo will get grumpy because he's tired but won't want to miss anything fun so I have plans to help that side of things.

My DH was also dead against the holiday but I booked it and told him it was happening. I'm looking forward to taking them away and spending lots of time with them.

BinBandit · 26/05/2022 15:26

The first abroad holiday we took ours was when they were coming up 2 and 3 and we went in May so it wasn't too hot but then we couldn't really use the pool as it was freezing. We'd gone many holidays before with them in the UK before this. Overall small DC enjoyed them all equally but it was nice for us parents to get a bit of sun sometimes. DC are usually happy enough with a pool and few toys and some nice walks/parks and they don't remember where they've been that young either. I never went abroad as a child and wanted to give them the experience of being able to swim outside.

It would probably be easier to do a holiday in the UK, however there is nothing wrong with wanting an abroad holiday for you, Dc will enjoy then equally at that age imo. It also depends on costs, in theory it's more expensive to go abroad and you could save the difference in price towards an abroad holiday when they are a bit older. However, in practice we've found it cheaper for us as 4 adults to have a week in Menorca (including flights, accommodation, luggage and transfers) than it was to get a cottage in the UK not counting the petrol etc needed to get there and having to drive about to do anything as it would be more likely to rain for the week.

And yes, children are work and it's not a holiday like you have as a couple or a single person, but surely the point of having DC was to have a different kind of life and give your DC experiences etc?

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