Let down after buying ed sheeran tickets for family

[lonelylou09]

Aibu to be massively annoyed at being let down just 2 weeks before the concert when i booked and paid for the tickets in September last year?
Basically i live 200 miles away from all my family and normally only see any of them 2/3 a year when i visit. I always stay with a certain relative that im very close with and last year she had a horrible time when her abusive husband left her for someone else which i did my best to help her through.
So as a treat and to cheer us both up i booked the tickets near her so we could have a really nice girls day out and something to look forward to. I booked time off work (unpaid) so i could travel up and spend time with her and her 2 dds, as well as catch up with other family.

She was working when i booked the tickets so i checked with her first and said Book it off work now.
She then got the sack and has been out of work since.
We spoke last week and discussed plans and the concert ect..all good.

Today she messaged me shes got her old job back, starts this weekend and wont be able to get the night off... Can i take someone else with me?

I said just tell them you cant work that day.... But shes just saying she probably cant as thats why she got the sack before.
It also means ive now got no where to stay as if shes working she will have to have her sister stay over to have the 2dd so no room for me.

So im now not sure what to do now.
Probably try to sell the tickets and cancel my holiday as well

Am i being unreasonable or is she being ungrateful?

@TravelDreamLife yes I've done that but can only list them via a fan sales page as its not that easy to resell ed sheeran tickets. Ive put them at less than ive paid but there are already other tickets available so not holding out much hope.
Definitely a lesson learned for me!

@StageRage ..not guilt tripping her at all.. Hence why coming on here to gauge generally reactions. And didnt say she was my sister

Tbh, that's what you get for buying tickets to see Ed sheeran.

@toastedbagiel absolutely pleased for her that shes got a job but ive already discussed with her previously that the shift patterns weren't great for either her or the dds because shes basically not home 4 evenings a week, over the weekend and she was constantly struggling with childcare and the dds being upset she wasnt home. They were being left in the care of her sister and non of them where happy about it. She at some point cut her shifts down to 2 nights a week and then still got the sack as she couldn't get childcare over night.
Non of those issues have changed now so i dont know how she is going to manage.. That would be my only reason for not being over joyed about her job

Yep. He’s a good egg. I never understand the hate he receives, if people don’t like his music, fine, but Ive seen some very personal attacks on him on here over the years. Nasty fuckers.

They just look daft to me. Coming into a thread about a person's problem and all they can come up with is "eD shEeRaN is ShItE!", it just shows a lack of intelligent thought. That's not the problem and who cares if they don't like him, the op probably does and so does the other person. Millions do or he wouldn't be loaded. Jealousy and stupidity.

It sucks op, sorry she's done this. Maybe she's worried about other costs since being unemployed, like drinks or food before or after. Surprised she got her job back at somewhere she got sacked though, that's very odd that they'd take her back. She can't go messing them around though now too, she'd lose her job again.

That sounds miserable. Her sister is basically doing near 100% of the non-school time with the kids. Sounds totally unsustainable.

But yabu.

Her AIBU would be
"I'm a single mum. Can't afford daycare so the only way I can work is to do night shifts while my sister has the kids overnight. She dislikes this and so so the kids but we try to make it work. Occasionally she lets me down and I have to miss a shift due to no alternative childcare and that got me sacked a few monthe ago and I have been on benefits and trying to get other work but no luck, and I have been spirallinginto debt and needing to use food banks. I went on my knees to my old employers and begged them to give me a second chance and swore I would never miss a shift again. I can only hope that now my sister will be less likely to let me down now that she knows how bad it gets for me when she does. But my AIBU is that an old friend bought concert tickets for us to go to a show together on a work night. They were booked ages ago and I thought I would be able to get the night off at the time. Now everything has changed, I will only be a week in to being back at work and I daren't ask for a night off or they will just sack me again. AIBU to not go to the concert?"

That would get 90% plus YANBU for your friend.

I LOVE Ed Sheeran. If it was London I’d buy them off you right now!

Can you not put them back on Ticketmaster?

Tickmaster have them, just checked.

How old are her kids? Any chance the eldest one would go with you?

He's in Cardiff. Totally messing up transport for people going to see Thunder

Sorry for delay in replying.. I have worked a 12 hour day today for those who said i obviously dont have a clue about what its like to have a job 🤣
As i stated previously its on our enrollment forms at work 'do you have any planned holidays booked?' and thats happened in other places ive worked also.... So yes i get that she might not want to demand the time off but my annoyance was she didnt seem bothered enough to want to ask considering its been prebooked for so long.

@PurassicJark i would in no way be expecting her to have paid for anything. In well over 10 years of us staying in each others houses ive always treated her when ive visited, plus bought my own food and since shes had children i always spoil them too as i rarely get to see them.
She did ask me when i booked it about the cost and i made it clear it was my gift. Even when she has visited me ive done things like paid for her train fare and all food ect even when there was 4 them and ive always been a struggling single mum too.

@Gottoomuchgoingon ..i know..my best friend is going tomorrow as its not far from us... Thats what's made me more annoyed that i was going 200 miles to take her to her closest one!

@Tigofigo no i cant take her sister and the children... I dont have 2 extra tickets and they are far too young. Also although her sister is also my relative theres just no bond between us at all... Never had been.

@Intrigueddotcom she never mentioned it.. Just said take someone else. I normally have one of the kids beds when i visit and they either share or the youngest shares with thier mum. Last time the house was a mess and the bunk beds where broke so i slept on a mattress in the living room. If she has work and her sister stays there she will have the 'spare' mattress and im not sleeping on the floor with the dog

@savethatkitty yes it feels more and more one sided in that in always there for her and do anything to help her out but its not the same in return.
Shes got previous for letting me down - when it was the first anniversary of when my mum died and the entire family where coming the 200 miles to mark the occasion and be together - so she had a lift and accommodation with me but she then messaged to say she was going to an old school friends baby shower instead. All the family were upset about it as she lied and said she couldn't get here but she had 3 different lift offers.

@Crocsandshocks hes literally playing in cardiff this weekend not too far from me and my best friend is going tomorrow. My tickets are for Manchester as thats just down the road for her as i wouldn't of expected her to come down to me to go.

@Laiste yes definitely never expected anything from her in return other than to actually come with me. Shes said now she will pay me back but she knows full well i would never and have never taken any money from her.

I've just seen Ed Sheeran. On my way home now. He was fantastic. I'm not a fan at all normally.

Perhaps see if the box office will let you exchange the Manchester tickets for Cardiff ones.

You sound like such a kind friend. I’m really sorry she’s let you down… but she does sound chaotic.

Ed tickets were in very high demand when they went on sale but he has so many dates that I’m not sure any are fully selling out. I’m sorry to say you are unlikely to get full price or near it if you sell them, but anything is better than nothing.

id find it hard to let it go, but she honestly does sound like someone who doesn’t stick to commitments.

So just to update.. Tickets are up for sale on a resale site but there are others so i dont think they will go.
Ive messaged her to say this and not to worry.. Its not worth falling out over but i hope she understands why im upset and that also if shes going to be working the entire time i was meant to be with her i know i also cant stay there as there wont be room.
She replied with shes sorry about the timing and if she is allowed to swop shifts she will and if so i can stay with her that night as her sister will go home once we are back so there is room for me. No mention of the fact that I was meant to be staying the week.
So im just hoping now they sell. 🤞🤞
I suppose i am being unreasonable to have thought she could tell them she couldn't work as thats been my experience that employers ask when taking you on about any upcoming prebooked holidays or unavailable dates so i thought that was pretty standard.
I feel like either way i dont want to go now as its spoilt the whole thing for me but we will see.

@Crocsandshocks tickets are non refundable so that wouldn't be an option.. Only option is to try to resell on a fan site. Ed sheeran made it so that tickets cant be bought in bulk by touts and then sold on for more money... Which is great.. Unless you need to sell your ticket and then its a balls ache.
Also im fully booked up with work and commitments to have enabled myself to organise 2 weeks off work to have been able to do this so its too short notice for me to be able to do that now.

@SarahDippity yes we've had previous fall outs years ago but ive made excuses as i know shes not had it easy and how difficult being in an abusive relationship is. Ive always made sure ive been there for her 100% and accepted that its not the same back as she had other things that come first.
Ive put the tickets on at a reduced rate so i guess if they look like they wont go i can lower the price as tbh its really not worth the other costs now of fuel and accommodation and giving the ticket to someone else.
I like to think im a nice person and try to do nice things for others but somehow it always ends up being a shit show and i wonder why i bother.