AIBU to ‘blame’ my job for my weight gain?

[fat13]

Please note - ‘blame’ in inverted commas as I know that ultimately I’m the reason I’ve gained weight, but I do think work is a bit of a trigger.

Life is v busy and stressful. On top of this, I am a teacher and I know I get good holidays but tbh it’s still getting me down a fair bit.

Ive gained weight. Largely because im run down and tired and drained at the end of every day and I’m turning to food as a quick pick me up for comfort and for energy and to feel good.

Has anyone ever broken this cycle or am I going to have to think of alternative careers?

I’m a teacher, I’ve also had office jobs. I think teaching is conducive to a healthy lifestyle, much more so than lots of other jobs. It’s active, the kids are happy and funny, you can control your environment to an extent ie you’re in charge of windows, heaters, fans, radios, quiet time (lack of control of these things used to cause me huge stress and discomfort in previous jobs, I remember having air con blasting on me all year in the office, I’d constantly have a cold and would wear my coat and scarf at my desk in July! I also had two radios on at work, one at each end of the office and I was in the middle - it was torture) and you get a decent lunchbreak as a teacher. I think you need to make the most of the good things about teaching.

That would all be fine if I didn’t leave to get little children!

But I think now the conflict is stemming from the fact I do want to lose weight but I also crave that comfort the food will give me.

Which do you want more?

I'm admittedly good at black and white thinking (despite ironically being the most indecisive person in the world). I usually try and decide which I'd pick if I could just press a button to accomplish it, and I choose that option. I think being indecisive is why I've likely adopted this somewhat military mindset, as nothing else works.

Now, to be slim … when I’m caught in the moment, who knows?

Could you look into something like Huel shakes? It's not the be all/end all substitute for food that many want it to be, but it's a reasonably healthy alternative to eating a load of crap. I always have a couple of bags in the cupboard and I'll mix it into porridge if I fancy something sweet, stodgy, and filling at short notice.

Whenever I've not got much in and think of ordering a pizza I'll have a massive bowl of porridge with vanilla of sticky toffee flavour Huel and it satisfies that craving but with almost no sugar and moderate calories.

That would all be fine if I didn’t leave to get little children!

Well yes, I did assume you were picking up kids - but that's still at least two hours more in an evening/afternoon than most people who work have.
You could do c25k with them, or else have them on bikes or in a buggy (depending on age). You could get them involved in cooking healthy dinners, even if they're in a high chair chucking stuff at you. You could do 30 mins of Caroline Girvans every afternoon while the kids play (or climb on you to make the planks harder).

It's easy to dismiss all that as "too hard", I know, but the key to a healthy lifestyle is being realistic about what you're working with, and fitting in what you can, around the various obstacles.

Meal replacements are definitely the best option for me @TruthHertz I will look into those, thanks.

We are at an awkward age where we will not sit in a buggy but won’t go for a walk either @trailrunner85 , it is difficult. I long for the days I walked miles with a pram or sling.

I found that shakes alone didn't keep me full though, and I've read a few studies where they trialled it and found that this is due to the body processing it much quicker than solid food.

However, Huel with porridge has been a lifesaver for me. Oats are ridiculously cheap and I love being able to eat a huge bowl of toffee flavoured porridge and know it's still relatively low in cals. Just don't put the Huel in first or microwave it or it'll go lumpy and grim. Make the porridge and then stir it in whilst hot. I also put some raisins or chopped banana in.

I have a very stressful job and Im the same. Just try things step by step rather than putting more pressure in yourself to overhaul ypur life all at once. Fists thing is drink more water. Get into the habit of taking a two glasses to bed and so you drink before you sleep and when you wake up. Hardboil a few eggs. Tyou could find time during the day to have q couple of when you comw home and are starving reach for knew of those instead of a biscuit. Force yourself to go to bad earlier so you are rested. Once you get those or similar habits established you can build on them

*TruthHertz · Today 12:25

The problem I often see is people thinking, talking, reflecting, agonising over it when really you just need to not put it in your mouth.*

This is so true.

MFP helped me realise how many "extras" were going in. The odd slice of toast, biscuit/chunk of cheese. WIth MFP for a few weeks I realised I was constantly 300+ calories over each day. Which is 1500-2000 a week. At least a days extra food a week. This cannot do anything but add weight.

And also YY to Huel.

I have only really had control over my weight since controlling my breakfast and lunch and making sure I had them. I used to have breakfast - but it was high carb and then I'd be hungry quite early. Then I started having a poached egg and a few spears of broccolli every morning. C150 cals of breakfast which seriously fills be up until 1pmish. Lunch was an issue as I never had time/couldn't be bothered - then I'd carb binge about 3/4pm. Started having 2 scoops of Huel shake every M-F lunch. Prepared it in the morning, in my bag to grab whenever I needed it. Keeps me going until tea time - which with the 4/500 calarie daytime intake - I do not have to think about any diet/calorie quantities.

So I am controlling my intake if you like - but do not feel I am on a diet or watching what I eat. Just by having regular, sustaining food for breakfast and lunch I do not slip into the carb-binge as my blood sugar has dropped.

Indeed. It's mainly just working out a system that works and then making it habit. I still have a pig out day/meal but it's when I actually choose, rather than just something that happens due to business and bad planning.

The 'trick' to not binge eating bad food ime is filling up on good stuff. Not eating all day and then being starving so you automatically grab easy and calorific food.

So make sure you have stuff in to make a bug delicious wrap for lunch with some fruit and a snack. Drink plenty of water as people often mistake thirst for hunger. And maybe ordering gousto or similar. Cooking is easy when you have all the ingredients there and measured out for you.

The mistake many people do (including me!) Is eating low calorie stuff in the day and therefore not eating enough. Our willpower is limited and we tend to have used it up by the time the evening comes.

Better to make sure you eat enough during the day so you dont have to use willpower and you continue.

Not teacher but manic days. I find making a milky coffee (almond milk) at work and having a snack waiting in the car helps. I sit in my car for 10 mins, enjoy my coffee and eat my snack. Then I rush home and get kids etc. Its amazing how those 10 mins let's me reset, takes hunger away

I keep re reading your comments @fat13 and I stick by what I said earlier: you are seeing leaving teaching as the magic wand that will make you slim and have a healthy relationship with food. That “if only this one thing changed, I would be happy…” thinking is a bit delusional.

Agree with @BitOutOfPractice .
OP, it probably doesn't feel like it right now, but you're in the easy bit. You have one very young DC (if I've interpreted your posts correctly) and a job that, though busy, finishes pre 4pm and doesn't involve working shifts or weekends. (I'm sure you mark work on a weekend, but presumably you can choose the hours you do that!)
At the moment your time is the most flexible it may be for a number of years, as there's no ferrying kids about to numerous clubs in an evening; no swimming/gym/cricket/whatever that rules much of your weekends out. Now is a great time to put good exercise and eating habits in place that you can stick to if and when things get more manic down the line. But instead you think leaving teaching will fix things - it won't. Unless you can afford not to work, that is. You could struggle to find a job paying the same amount that has as convenient working hours and holidays.

My last school had a 30 minute lunchbreak which was just sufficient to allow 20-25 minutes to walk from my department block to the canteen and eat. It was movement, a little dose of fresh air and a sensible, reasonably balanced portion of food. It was pretty easy to regulate.

Time to exercise was a tad more tricky.

This happened to me after I had a child. I was unhappy, stressed and tired, so I reached for treats for energy and to cheer me up. If I had the option to quit motherhood (as you can quit your job) then I would have done.

TA here. I also am starving and also exhausted at 330 every day. I have found that eating a no-oil jacket potato (just plain with a bit of ketchup or half a cup of low sugar and salt beans). It means I get a hit of starch/carbs for energy and feel full until dinner without overeating snacky crap. And I do a walk first thing in the morni g early for my mental health as well. Making small changes will add up. Also walking or cycling to school once a week if you are less than 5 miles.

@trailrunner85 if this is as easy as it gets then I’m screwed, seriously.

I lost over 5 stone while teaching full time. It's not the job that's making you overweight. You have to find a way to eat real food that fills you up enough so that you can avoid all the crap food in the staffroom and avoid binge eating because you're so hungry at the end of the day. I had scrambled eggs for breakfast and porridge with a few sultanas, made with soya milk, every lunchtime. Takes 2 minutes in the microwave, minimal prep.I always had a bag of fruit in my desk to snack on. Had a weekly meal plan for evening meals, wouldn't make any meal that took more than 30m to prepare and rigorously stuck to it. Worked for me. Changing your job won't help because you'll still be you. You have to change how and what you eat. Best diet advice I ever had was 'eat real food, not too much'. Good luck.

Also a teacher and I do manage to eat quite well in the day (porridge/fruit/overnight oats for breakfast, soup or salad for lunch) but then to give me energy to do planning and marking in the evening I scoff loads of supper and chocolate and pudding early evening.

Is the key to just be ruthless about not spending as much time working, and ensuring an early night to avoid this exhaustion? Easier said than done...and actually am inclined to think that teaching is unsustainable as we all know..Good luck OP

I'm a teacher and it is hard, there's no time for gym membership and I'm always tired.
I did couch to 5k and make sure I get at least 10k of steps in daily, with any runs being extra.
I always have a banana in my bag and try to eat a healthy-ish lunch. There are days when I have to buy a sandwich but usually I cook extra on the evenings and take leftovers.
It's not easy to lost weight or keep fit but it is possible.

@DogsAndGin where do you teach in order to have a "decent lunch break"?! 😀

Your description of the offices you have worked in sound a bit grim though and I do agree that there are loads of positives about being in schools!

Since asking for and taking a demotion at work, I have lost half a stone in a month, mainly due to having the headspace to be able to think about sensible food and exercise. I also now get a lunch break instead of scoffing wotsits between back to back calls.

I’m a teacher and I don’t understand how you don’t have time at all to eat lunch?

It’s very important to me to have 20 minutes in the staff room with my friends eating lunch. But I don’t achieve that nearly every day. And realistically I often eat at my desk while marking through lunchtime, but I always have lunch.

How lo is your lunchtime? If you don’t have time at all regularly to even eat a sandwich or wrap or something then there’s a bigger problem with how you’re managing your workload. Because I appreciate how busy it is, but unless you’re regularly scheduling meetings through lunch then I don’t see how you don’t have time to take even five minutes to eat something, even if it’s not something you have to heat up.

i don’t mean this to sound harsh, and I have had a few times when I haven’t been able to have lunch due to meetings being scheduled through my lunch or emergencies with the children but those have been rare.