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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

High earners - how do you spend your salary?

988 replies

Citygirly · 21/05/2022 10:03

DH and I earn just under £140k combined.

We do maximum pension payments (his is 9% as NHS) and we also give about 10% a month to charity.

Other than that, we plan to start overpaying the mortgage. We invest £1k a month (so £500 each) and save £1k for holidays. We of course do general/specific savings but then have a good chunk left over for disposable income.

AIBU to ask other high earning households how they tend to allocate their money? Just want to see if we could be using it better or this is about right for comparables.

OP posts:
Jmaho · 22/05/2022 11:18

SofiaSoFar · 22/05/2022 10:27

I find that like water, life adapts to fill the amount of money you earn...

I think this is the problem for some people. They spend whatever they have, so once tougher times come they're in trouble.

I know quite a few people who live like that. I can't imagine doing it myself.

We are comfortable on a joint income of much less than £100k because we didn't do this
We both drive second hand cars each bought for around £5k ish. Mine needs replacing next year and we have the cash to do so. Will probably spend a bit more this time perhaps £10k. We do go abroad for 2 weeks every summer which we save for monthly, same as Xmas and birthdays as we have 4 children so it's expensive. Aside from that and paying for extra curriculum activities, clothes days out etc the odd takeaway, our outgoings have been the same for a few years now
My husband changed jobs fairly recently and got a pay rise of around 20%. It just means we save more. Likewise I work 18.5 hours currently but will up it to 28 hours in the next few years. Again more will go into savings. I'd rather have a good amount in the bank to help children out with uni and houses in the future than move to a bigger house or buy a better car
I work in mortgages and am often shocked at how so many high earners have lots of debt and are in their overdrafts every month due to lifestyle spending
Many of them are earning huge amounts yet have no savings
I have friends in a similar position who spend like crazy and are relying on inheritance to repay the mortgage and provide a deposit for their children in the future

lancsgirl85 · 22/05/2022 11:18

but there's no point to either post on either thread is there? The posts from those struggling on threads like this are clearly plopped in to make the poster and others in the same position feel shit. So I would be open to the possibility that they were being a dick, actually.

Wow. If that's your view of the poster who can't afford bread, that's she's a dick and thrives on others feeling sorry for her, then we are vastly different people and are never going to agree so let's leave that there.

Zeus44 · 22/05/2022 11:19

Usual derailment of threads by people who can’t contribute. Always around money which is no surprise.

I have quite a large household income, it’s made up of numerous income streams and we invest about 80% of it in generating further income.

This is to fund private schooling, travel and nice things.

Nothappyatwork · 22/05/2022 11:19

workintums · 22/05/2022 11:17

I was think the point of these threads and what’s so good about them is that they do educate people financially.

Do they? I mean the vast majority of people I know who earn well came from solid backgrounds & we were all helped onto the ladder (including me) by family. I know loads of people who moved during the pandemic all given sums like 200k up the ladder.

Well it would’ve educated me had I not had those around me at work that I felt comfortable to ask questions of. I think the only reason for that was that we were in a sales environment. Now I work in professional services I can absolutely assure you nobody in KPMG sits down over a sandwich in the canteen and starts explaining to the younger members of the team how to maximise their investments and their pension they probably should but it’s just far too conservative/circumspect. I can only imagine Law is 10 times worse.

workintums · 22/05/2022 11:20

@burnoutbabe I guess so much is dependent on age & location. Most people buying in the last few yrs will still be paying a lot of a tiny flat.

Original poster
Citygirly · 22/05/2022 11:22

Nothappyatwork · 22/05/2022 11:14

I was think the point of these threads and what’s so good about them is that they do educate people financially.
I was so lucky I went into a sales role when I was straight out of university, worked with other people who were middle to upper class and basically I just did what they were doing so instead of buying shit at Karen Millen which is what some of my colleagues did who didn’t observe management.
I went and bought a house and literally three years later that house doubled in price .
Unfortunately I then sold it but the proceeds of it allowed me to spend four years at home with my children that I would never of had without it.

Dont they say that you are the average of the five people you spend most time with ?
if you spend all your time on Mumsnet it could go either way for you.

This actually made me laugh at loud as I actually bought my first KM dress just this week. For me, I have sometimes felt out of place at work as not been able to afford quality clothes such as this beforehand and have been very aware of that. I want to make sure I look and feel the part for client meetings etc.

However, we have bought a house and do invest so I think it's a balance. It's difficult to know if I'm spending frivolously as me and DH can't always agree as we have different views on how to spend disposable income.

OP posts:
C8H10N4O2 · 22/05/2022 11:23

Katypp · 22/05/2022 10:40

@lancsgirl85 i didn't mean you specifically, no. But what's the relevance of posting about people with no money on a thread about high earners? If a high earner posted on a thread about someone struggling saying they had no advice because they had plenty of money they would be torn apart.

There is a difference between punching up and punching down.

If this was intended as a good faith post I'd expect to see it in "Money", not AIBU where the outcome was utterly predictable.

I'm also bemused that the OP apparently has no peers to observe or discuss this with since she would have a pretty good idea that peers are on similar income whilst on here, we can all be gazillionaires if we choose.

workintums · 22/05/2022 11:23

I have quite a large household income, it’s made up of numerous income streams and we invest about 80% of it in generating further income.

such as what? btls?

Merryclaire · 22/05/2022 11:23

Katypp · 22/05/2022 11:08

@Merryclaire sorry I forgot that teachers and nurses have a monopoly on hard work - silly me.
I agree this post would be better in money though, although I expect there would still be a pile-on there

You sound very resentful towards key workers. No one is saying they have the monopoly on hard work - lots of people work hard. DH are both incredibly hard working and put in many extra hours with no additional pay - but we are the first to admit our jobs are less important to society than the likes of nurses and teachers. The point is, they should be well-paid professions.

Katypp · 22/05/2022 11:23

@Topgub i don't work in the medical profession so I am prepared to be told I am wrong here, but to get to the top of band 5, you don't need any additional qualifications do you? Just to have been in the job long enough?
There's no comparison with law (which I also don't work in) as you will have to specialise and take additional qualifications to reach £85k in most practises. The big London law firms wages skew averages for lawyers. Most lawyers work in provincial law firms and won't earn anywhere near £85k.

Original poster
Citygirly · 22/05/2022 11:24

@C8H10N4O2 how do you propose that I raise this topic with my peers at work who are just my colleagues and definitely not friends? People are happy to talk about holidays and staycations and recommendations for those but they definitely do not discuss the cost.

OP posts:
lancsgirl85 · 22/05/2022 11:25

@C8H10N4O2

There's a difference between punching up and punching down.

Thank you, you articulated nicely in one sentence what I was trying to say about why it's not comparable!

CockSpadget · 22/05/2022 11:26

@Citygirly genuine question. Why did you post on AIBU instead of a financial or money related forum?

Katypp · 22/05/2022 11:26

@lancsgirl85 wow indeed. If you choose to interpret it that way I agree, let's leave it there

lancsgirl85 · 22/05/2022 11:30

@Katypp

No "interpretation" needed, you literally said:

*The posts from those struggling on threads like this are clearly plopped in to make the poster and others in the same position feel shit. So I would be open to the possibility that they were being a dick, actually.
*
So you are "open to the possibility" that the poster who can't afford bread, is a being a dick by posting here.

🙄

lancsgirl85 · 22/05/2022 11:32

And I find it hypocritical of you to bang on about my "interpretation" when you used the phrase "well meaning virtue signaller" to summarise what was my genuine empathy for another poster.

You're doing a fair bit of dodgy interpretation yourself.

burnoutbabe · 22/05/2022 11:32

yes knowing a lot of soon to be trainee lawyers, they go from broke student to high earning london lawyer very quick.

So not sure when they would suddenly get the investment/saving buzz.

With lots of big employers like lawyers/accounting firms there are often LOADS of non-work chats/events organised. LGBTQ etc and diversity and menopause. So maybe its worth suggesting to HR that one on pensions could be arranged. And then maybe suggest for some of those people an "investments club" for people who want to pick shares etc. bound to be some who are investing in Bitcoin?

a post on facebook to friends to ask if anyone knows about "investing in shares" to find a few like minded people who can form a FB group.

Katypp · 22/05/2022 11:32

@lancsgirl85 whatever. We'll agree to differ as long as you have the last word. Go on, be my guest...

Robinni · 22/05/2022 11:34

Perplexed0522 · 22/05/2022 09:30

To my eyes it should be a mandatory subject and they should go back to the way it was in 50s/60s with children learning life skills such as sewing in primary.

Sewing is a life skill?

I was in Primary School in the early 90s and I had a lesson every week on how to sew. It was completely pointless.

Secondary school children are not going to have sewing as their hobby……and by the time it comes to having to having to actually sew a button onto something they aren’t going to remember anything from sewing lessons they had 20 years ago.

If parents are so bothered about their children learning to sew then they should teach it themselves and let schools focus on what really matters.

And as for economy lessons at schools…..I imagine it will just open up a whole new can of worms and the classes will go just like this thread has…..those from very wealthy families making those from poorer backgrounds feel like shit. I imagine the class will provide a great platform for bullying.

Finance, budgeting, learning about pensions etc should be provided by the children’s parents……people who’ve probably experienced what it’s like to need to budget and struggle with the battle between their incomes and their outgoings, as opposed to a twenty something old teacher fresh out of Uni.

@Perplexed0522 a relative of mine was a textile engineer and a high earner. They developed their love of sewing at school…. Because of HE…….

Not so pointless for them was it.

Also, many working class people do not have pensions, are in massive amounts of debt and have no clue about money management or wealth building.

It needs to come from school. Many parents do not have the experience themselves to give guidance.

Merryclaire · 22/05/2022 11:35

@lancsgirl85 if you took a poll of the general population of who was being a bigger dick - the person who told us all they are sad because they can’t afford to buy food, or the person who said that person was a dick for making rich people feel bad, I think we know which way it would go!

Chesneyhawkes1 · 22/05/2022 11:36

I spend it! I'll be a long time dead and I want to enjoy my life now.

Of course I pay my half of the mortgage and bills. Some goes into my work pension.

The rest I enjoy. I don't have my own DC. So no need to save for anyones future but my own.

Don't know what DH does with his, separate accounts.

HandbagsnGladrags · 22/05/2022 11:37

Forgot about my lovely designer handbag collection. How could I forget that.

AtillatheHun · 22/05/2022 11:37

Weird there’s no reference to those 13 years of debt repayments in the op

burnoutbabe · 22/05/2022 11:39

Merryclaire · 22/05/2022 11:35

@lancsgirl85 if you took a poll of the general population of who was being a bigger dick - the person who told us all they are sad because they can’t afford to buy food, or the person who said that person was a dick for making rich people feel bad, I think we know which way it would go!

isn't it similar to anyone posting on a thread where someone has a falling out with their parents for good reasons.

And then someone posts "mine is dead, you are lucky to have a mum"

it is just a bit dickish to post that isn't it? it is not helpful to the OP who has the specific issue.

workintums · 22/05/2022 11:40

It needs to come from school. Many parents do not have the experience themselves to give guidance.

I agree in part but for the majority money goes to money & for most what your parents have will determine your prospects. We already see this with housing, dc with parents who own their own homes & have parents who can help eg live at home to save or a cash gift are more likely to own their own homes.