To think more men than we think are undercover paedophiles

[josil]

Watching the pedophile hunter on Netflix - in summary it is about a vigilante group who go onto dating sites 18+ but post pictures of girls who look underage and then when the guy chats to them tells them they're 11 or 12 etc.

The men carry on chatting and then arrange to meet - they don't tell the girls they're too young.

This is so sad and troubling. These men were originally looking for women and then got drawn in by children. How many husbands, sons, work colleagues are doing this - what can we do as society to better sniff it out?

Sad and sickening. What can we do to protect children from this?

They put dangerous animals down, I believe.

And what was the original intention of the ‘joke’ out of curiosity? What was supposed to be funny? What did you imagine the end result would be? Like what was the actual plan behind the ‘joke’ of making a profile of yourself with teen pictures then contacting men?

In my field of work I have discovered that there are WAY more than you could even imagine. It's terrifying.

Why is everyone getting so hung up about who the vigilantes are and what they are doing rather than the people who are abusing children.

Yes I do. I’ve heard of 3 in the past two years - 2 I actually met personally before I knew of their crimes and I had no idea. One was a teacher in my DC’s school - both DCs had him as a teacher, and they couldn’t believe it.
The other was a p/t teacher living locally to me - my friend knew him and I had even been to his (very nice) house. He had grown-up kids of his own 😱
The last was an employee in a company my dh did some work for, on his computer, let’s say he didn’t hide his photos very well…
I also know of two more - again, one had an ‘in’ with children and another I’m not sure of, I met him once 30 years ago and he turned out to be a convicted paedo years later.
Unfortunately I think that’s the tip of the iceberg. I hope that they find it much harder to hide though as it becomes easier to root them out online or in other ways.
idk too much about vigilantes - but I do know paediatricians have been targeted because thick people don’t know the difference - that certainly cannot happen.

Because we have laws in this country,and people who are paid to catch and prosecute offenders;vigilantism isn't the best way to deal with those who are suspected of breaking any law. The logical conclusion is that any group can proclaim themselves to be on a mission and hunt down any suspect, with what could be disastrous consequences. There are people who complain about the police making mistakes, but are happy to have a completely unregulated group patrolling and dishing out 'justice'.

Why is everyone getting so hung up about who the vigilantes are and what they are doing rather than the people who are abusing children

Actually some of us care about both - the second group more than the first, obviously

As people said on a similar thread there's nothing wrong with passing any information discovered to the police - it's what we're asked to do anyway - but the complication's when "vigilantes" get in the way of enquiries by dispensing their own justice, all too often on the wrong person

JustDanceAddict prepare for someone to claim yet again that the paediatrician/paedophile case was an urban myth and didn't happen.
It wasn't and it did, but it seems to soothe some of the vigilante sympathisers to believe it was all made up

ChagSameachDoreen · Today 06:56
Angelbaby1985
would think theres more woman out there than people think as well

I think you might be right. But I also think that even if there are more women paedophiles than most people think, then that doesn't mean that the numbers aren't vanishingly small.

If this is in doubt clearly none of you have seen the most popular videos on porn sites - the major sites actually fix the results to show more palatable stuff but the less regulated sites always have icky and illegal stuff as the top search terms. Also the amount of child face filters /school uniforms used by only fans girls is gross. it’s a world wide problem and it’s only getting worse As people consume more and more media

I have a gut feeling about a member of my own family being a paedophile but have 0 evidence. I do my best to avoid them and have never left my children with them. I believe a lot of Men are attracted to young girls/tweens/teenagers and see nothing wrong with it. I once overheard a group of builders wolf whistling a teenager in school uniform and one said "there's a nice bit of jail bait".

I was reading the thread thinking this. I started getting openly leered at and wolf-whistled from around 10/11. Not by creeps in anoraks hiding behind trees. Just shamelessly, on the street.

In my field of work I have discovered that there are WAY more than you could even imagine. It's terrifying

same. And loads and loads of happily married/loving grandfathers etc etc. They want to be with young girls.

There are loads of innocent people killed or injured because vigilantes have the wrong person. Just saying

One of my schoolfriends grew up on a farm, his father was a bit older than his mother so when we were teens he would have been late 60s. Well respected member of local community. He used to drop everything at his farm and drive into town a few days a week at 3pm in his 4x4, then park up near the bus station and watch schoolgirls coming out. If any of us decided to go into town we would always see him and it would be blindingly obvious what he was at, even though he would sit with a newspaper open and pretend to be waiting on someone whilst peering over the top of the pages. Always the same place at the same time and then he’d leave on his own.

I think its way broader than men and children. Most people find it hard to imagine people whose thought processes are different to their own. For example is it theft to lie about your child's age for cheap tickets, or misuse the self serve checkouts. A quick look on here shows very few topics people agree totally right and wrong. There are examples where 95% of people think it's wrong and we still have posters saying ' it's OK because....'

I feel like a lot of these men are not even pedophiles in the scientific sense of the word. They just think that all women and children are objects provided to meet their needs.

& if we encourage vigilante groups, we'll end up with more entitled arsehole vigilantes on the streets.

Like PP, I reckon most of them aren't motivated by wanting to protect children.

Oh yes. My ex, years ago. Found out he had raped a child before we got together. I was 18 and he was 32 when he absolutely bombarded me and smooth talked me and we got together. After we broke up, I was invited to the station a few months later and interviewed by the police about his sexual habits, some of which I had found unappealing, like how he revealed at the end of our relationship his sadistic kink for wanting his partner to cry and seem afraid which I had refused to indulge. He had groomed and then raped a 13 year old girl when he was 30. I hate how I didn't know.

There was a really interesting article years ago in the Observer about how most paedophiles are young guys, family men, the kind you’d never suspect. They are often left handed which indicates it happens in the womb… I’ll try to find the article.

As for the poster suggesting women as paedophiles, the statistic stands at around 99% men. And the women who do are closely linked to men who are. Why the fuck is that, testosterone? Similar figures for sex offenders and murderers by the way.

I have watched a few of those hunter videos on youtube and what really strikes me is how different the men are. You can find pretty much every type of man represented. Some are clearly vile predators – really creepy, dangerous men who wouldn't hesitate to assault a child. They are the real thing, and it's sickening to watch. Others are just pathetic weirdos who'd probably freak out if a real girl turned up. Quite a lot are difficult to gauge. I mean I'm not sure what they'd do.

But some are normal, intelligent, pleasant guys, the sort you'd chat to at your son's cricket game, or down the local pub. Indeed, many of them remind me of cousins and friends. A lot of them are fathers as well. I remember seeing a documentary in which the police officer described a man he'd arrested for arranging to meet a 14-year-old girl. The man told the officer that when he left the house that morning he'd looked at a photo of his own children and thought "if I get caught I may never see you again." I guess that shows you how strong the urge can be. Even though he knew he could go to jail, and that his kids might never talk to him again, he still went through with it.

The problem, of course, is the internet. Lots of middle-aged men fantasise about young girls. It's not pleasant, but it's kind of normal. (When I say young, I don't mean pre-pubescent, I mean 13 to 16). Remember, evolution doesn't care about morality. From an evolutionary point of view, a 15-year-old girl is perfect for producing offspring – she's young and healthy. Before the internet, there was nothing to feed that fantasy, however. It was something that men kept hidden, and didn't even admit to themselves. Unfortunately, the internet caters to pretty much every dark thought or desire.

With the more normal guys, I suspect the line between fantasy and reality has become blurred. Only when they go to meet does reality smack them in the face. By then, of course, it's too late. Maybe I'm naive, but I like to think that a few of them would feel ashamed if an actual girl turned up. Once they were face to face with a skinny, awkward, nervous child, the fantasy would disintegrate.

I have no doubt it's far more common than statistics suggest. I have known so many women who were abused. Of those women, only one went to the police. And that was only because her friends forced her to. She'd never have gone of her own free will.

One friend told me that her mother, who was an alcoholic, had a string of boyfriends during my friend's teenage years. Quite a few of them abused her. They'd wait until her mum had passed out drunk, then come into her room. She once said, in this really sad, bitter way, "I always had a different stepdad coming in to kiss me goodnight." It sent a chill through me – and still does. The most shocking thing is that it happened over and over again. If her mum had had one horrible boyfriend who abused her, that would have been bad enough. But the fact that she was assaulted by a string of different men is horrifying. Needless to say she never went to the police (and no doubt those men have now got wives and children of their own, and no doubt they sit in the pub ranting about how evil Harvey Weinstein is, and how they'd kill any man who touched their daughter).

I bet there are countless men out there who've done that sort of thing and never been caught. In fact, most of us probably know a man who has something dark in his past.

not underage but my cousin got married a few years go, huge wedding in a stately home. They come from a well off family.

her new husband is in prison for having sex with his 16 year old student.

I have to disagree the men are overwhelming middle aged white males.

Which is another massively controversial thing IMO - why is there no stereotype for middle aged white men as paedohiles? Funny that.

@Kris02
From an evolutionary point of view, a 15-year-old girl is perfect for producing offspring – she's young and healthy. Before the internet, there was nothing to feed that fantasy, however. It was something that men kept hidden, and didn't even admit to themselves. Unfortunately, the internet caters to pretty much every dark thought or desire.

Thats not true about before the internet there being nothing to feed the fantasy. All through history and still today it has been quite common for girls to be trafficked into sex work from age 11 or 12. In many countries, girls were and still are child brides at that age as well. The further back in history you go, the more acceptable it was. It’s more hidden now than it was in the past because it is become less culturally acceptable.

The problem, of course, is the internet. Lots of middle-aged men fantasise about young girls. It's not pleasant, but it's kind of normal. (When I say young, I don't mean pre-pubescent, I mean 13 to 16). Remember, evolution doesn't care about morality. From an evolutionary point of view, a 15-year-old girl is perfect for producing offspring – she's young and healthy. Before the internet, there was nothing to feed that fantasy, however. It was something that men kept hidden, and didn't even admit to themselves. Unfortunately, the internet caters to pretty much every dark thought or desire.

I don't think the internet is to blame, not for this.

As a child my brother and I would often be taken tot he pub by our parents on a Sunday, one of the regulars was my brother's head master. My brother was at a boy's school with a mixed VI form, the school happened to be next door to a fire station.

For some reason the boss (don't know the real title) had a meeting with the HM, and during the conversation appologised for his fire fighters leering at the new VI form girls walking past.

HM shrugged and said it was the same in the school staff room.

This was apparently a funny anecdote.