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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Weird contact

71 replies

Happyclapper18 · 17/05/2022 21:15

AIBU to think that it's weird for a mother to call her son every day? Son is 25 and has left home, lives with GF. Mom is divorced but still has DD 19 Yrs old at home.

OP posts:
Snowiscold · 17/05/2022 21:24

No, I don’t think that’s particularly weird.

ThankYouStavros · 17/05/2022 21:25

Nah

HikingforScenery · 17/05/2022 21:26

Not really.
mum guessing you’re the gf?

Qwill · 17/05/2022 21:27

My mum calls me every day, and I’m married with children!

Darbs76 · 17/05/2022 21:29

No it’s not weird.

tackling · 17/05/2022 21:30

Going against the grain, I'd think that was a bit unusual really. How does son feel about it?

coffeecupsandfairylights · 17/05/2022 21:30

Not really.

I speak to my mum most days and DH is the same with his parents.

Original poster
Happyclapper18 · 17/05/2022 21:32

No not the GF. Guess my family are just very different.

OP posts:
Basilbrushgotfat · 17/05/2022 21:33

As a former gf in this situation I found it a bit much, but then the apron strings weren't cut, his mother was very involved in our lives and lack of boundaries was an issue.

I'm incredibly close to my mum and chat several times a week. Daily chats tend to be only when I'm going through a horrible time and they're quite short.

EcafTnuc · 17/05/2022 21:33

Not normal for me (or DP) but it could absolutely be the norm for another family. I don’t see the problem with it.

Are you the Gf? It sounds like you are and have a problem with it, if so, why?

EcafTnuc · 17/05/2022 21:34

Crosspost. If you’re not the girlfriend why are you concerned by this?

AceofPentacles · 17/05/2022 21:36

Yes very weird

Original poster
Happyclapper18 · 17/05/2022 21:37

I think he feels like she relies on him too much. She has made him like the head of the family even though his dad is very close to his kids since their divorce. 2 DD's always defer to him instead of their dad. Dad is my partner and he has allowed himself to be pushed out.Makes me so mad.

OP posts:
Alovelydayatlast · 17/05/2022 21:38

I speak to 4 of my adult dc every day. And 1 is living abroad..

agentshreddie · 17/05/2022 21:38

Every family is different. We call each other everyday. We're very close.

Floppy234 · 17/05/2022 21:40

I speak to my mum about 4 times a day, see her most days too as parents and in laws do the childcare.
I Like to think I will always speak to my children everyday regardless of how old they are or where they live.

winterchills · 17/05/2022 21:40

Not weird at all!!

Purplecatshopaholic · 17/05/2022 21:45

I do think that’s weird actually - and find it weird others think it’s not weird, lol. Guess all families are different. No way would I speak to my mum weekly, never mind daily, and we got on fine. Same with other family members.

ChaToilLeam · 17/05/2022 21:47

No. My family don’t do this but many do and I don’t see how there is anything wrong with it unless she is monopolizing hours of his time.

rnsaslkih · 17/05/2022 21:50

If it's what they both want and it isn't hurting anyone else, then it's fine.

frogswimming · 17/05/2022 21:52

I'm a bit confused who's who. But in general no I don't think it's weird. My dh speaks to his mum every day. Always has. I've always been pleased as he treats her well and this reflects how he treats everyone.

yourestandingonmyneck · 17/05/2022 21:53

Happyclapper18 · 17/05/2022 21:37

I think he feels like she relies on him too much. She has made him like the head of the family even though his dad is very close to his kids since their divorce. 2 DD's always defer to him instead of their dad. Dad is my partner and he has allowed himself to be pushed out.Makes me so mad.

Well that's a whole different scenario to the thread you started, which is a mother speaking to her son every day.

DefiniteTortoise · 17/05/2022 21:53

It would have been weird to my family! Mind you we used to laugh together (as a family) at my mum's friend who told her young DD she loved her multiple times a day. So maybe we're the weird ones...

To be clear, my family's behaviour does seem rather sad in hindsight and I don't do this now

Jagley · 17/05/2022 21:54

I speak to my mum a few times a day, and my dad once, so normal for me!

Momicrone · 17/05/2022 21:57

Yes, scissors needed eventually

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