To be upset about people getting my age old

[Yorkie88]

My DH tells me to shut up about this but I'm so upset about a comment at work today. Someone said "he's about our age, early 40s maybe" to me.

I'm 36.

Thing is I'm a new director of the company and am much younger than the other directors (not being a dick or boasting but my DH says this is why). I'm trying to take comfort in that. But in truth it's happened a few times before socially. People aging me 5+ years.

I look knackered as work full time with two kids under three. And a useless DH. But I can't see many wrinkles. I don't know. I feel so depressed about it.

We are meant to be saving for a house move but I want to book secret botox. There is nothing wrong looking like you're in your forties but its 5 - 8 years old than I actually am.

Get your hormone levels tested, you sound over stressed. It's just an off the cuff generalisation, he'd still have said the same no matter how much secret botox you'd had.

35-45 is difficult to distinguish imo

You just get the lower number if you are getting sleep and looking after yourself. Good nutrition does the world of good for your skin and the sparkle in your eyes. As well as middle aged spread - that definitely ages you. If you’ve got the middle aged spread thing going on, resolving that would be better than Botox, it instantly ages you. Not in a positive way

Um, early 40s doesn't equal 'wrinkly old prune', OP!!! We don't hit 40 and suddenly get loads of wrinkles and go great overnight!
I'm early 40s and would absolutely have 'about our age'ed you. Because we are about the same age - see literally every tick box on a form ever. We are in the 35-44 tick box, young but not in the first flush of youth, were at school at the same time, have similar pop culture references, likely look similarish ages, are hitting similar life milestones. I wouldn't say it about someone in their 20s, nor their late 50s upwards, but someone a mere 6 years younger absolutely.

Everyone stresses about ageing and their appearance now and then- there's nothing silly about it!

It could just be sleepless nights and stress. Lots of visible effects of ageing can be reversed so don't think that you'll inevitably keep looking like you're in your 40s at 37/38.

i had the opposite, he kept mentioning how OLD and ancient he was and how no-one would know this band or tv show and i had to point out that i was a year older. (both of us just below 50)

In those makeover programmes that were popular way back, the treatments that had the most effect were always having a decent hair cut and getting teeth fixed. Everything else was just an added extra. Oh and not being fat. Being fat is aging (annoyingly).

I would definitely say 36 and 42 are the same age bracket. Old isn’t a bad thing anyway (40s is definitely not old). It can benefit you for people to think you’re older than you are.

You’re over-analysing.

35 is about forty

45 is about forty

95 is about a hundred

105 is about a hundred.

Don’t let a colleague’s casual rounding up get you down 🤣

@PinkArt I'm joking about "wrinkly old prune".

I don't mind what people think of me. I just feel a bit sad about looking so knackered when I'm only in my 30s. Also I think people are right that I think of myself as a "young person" who is mid thirties and this feels miles away from a middle aged person. But im not the same person I was pre covid..I'm now married, with two kids, a promotion, a mortgage and an extra stone

Nothing special. Just classic getting older panic. Just wish my forehead didn't look so Gordon Ramsay. 😕

I really don't think anyone would say this because they think you look 'old' though. Because early 40s isn't old, nor does it look much different to mid 30s. Early 40s is Holly Willoughby, Kim Kardashian, Sophie Ellis Bextor, Natalie Portman, Sienna Miller - hardly the Golden Girls! They're just mentally lumping you in with other people within what is in the grander scheme the same age group.
Plenty of people wouldn't even consider your 40s middle aged, even if technically it is. I promise you won't wake up on your 40th with a blue rinse and start looking for knitting patterns at the library!

Your husband is the problem. Not your colleague. If you’re run ragged because he’s so useless, you’re going to look knackered. More importantly, your health could suffer.

Don't have Botox FFS! People are notoriously crap at estimating ages and will just assume you're roughly the same age, especially if knowing you are younger will make them feel worse about themselves. Try not to sweat it. I doubt you look ancient!!

Aw op. You're probably just feeling a bit worn out
agree with PP i wouldve understood that to me "our age late 30s, possibly early 40s?"

away and treat yourself if you can afford it
why do you have such a good career and crap DH? Can you take turns with school run? Bed times? Get a cleaner? Boot his arse!

if youve enough money , absolutely take time for yourself. Its hard being a working mum!

+also , is it botox you think you need? Would a new hair or updated makeup or wardrobe not be better? At 36 , unless you hit the sunbeds too much or smoked a lot, you shouldn't really need a lot of botox ?