AIBU to let my 2 year old wear a bikini?

[Bluebirds1987]

DH and I are staying in a holiday park and today we took DDs (2yr old and 8 month old) swimming in the pool. It was full of parents with children.

DH said just now that while we were there, he overheard some women looking at me and DD1, discussing that the bikini she was wearing "sexualised" her.

Its a Little Mermaid bikini with frilly detail and sparkly bits. DD1 Picked it out herself and she absolutely loves it. DH took great joy in chipping in that it's only sexualising her if you look at it that way, before telling them that's his daughter.

I honestly never even thought about it that way, to me she's just a little 2 year old girl in a Disney outfit and if I'd heard them I'd have been fuming! I have never come across anything like this before and it's the first time she's worn it, I'd like to think I can dress her in whatever she likes and feels confident in and that it's their problem they don't think it's appropriate, not mine.

But, I'm open for debate.

Were they out of order, or should I not let my 2 year old show her bare tummy in a public place?
Photo showing the bikini in question!

It's cute. They're sexualising her.

Function/practicality is a part of why parents might prefer a two piece for a young girls instead of a one piece as already explained in the thread.

It’s fine OP it’s just a little girls swim set they were being ridiculous

my dd had to wear 2 piece / bikinis at a similar age on the beach and we got looks and one comment but people can be ignorant just ignore them

Definitely not sexualised.

yes the most sensible thing is a rash vest and shorts, but if she really likes it and has plenty of sun cream on, I can’t see the harm.

i wouldn’t suggest putting a little kid in a bikini that looked anything like an adult one, but this doesn’t really

I'd never comment but I'd also never put my 2 year old in a bikini. My 8 year old was given one as a hand me down and still not keen.

.

Definitely not trying to make my child looked older it attractive thanks.

They definitely do stay in place. They don't have cups, it's a cropped top.

No more or less protection from sun whether you choose a one or two piece swimsuit apart from a small amount of back/tummy being visible.

They are more comfortable when drying off and easier for toilet trips it's really that simple.

You are looking at this wrong. There is nothing sexualised about a child wearing a crop tankini top. Anyone suggesting otherwise has a big problem.
The OP's DD wanted to wear this. If her DS had wanted to wear one similar I am sure she would have let him - would she be sexualising him? Or would the busybody women"s comments be different

That's insane. We grew up just wearing bottoms!!

It’s impossible to sexualise a two year old.
Only a truly sick adult thinks otherwise.

Eek
A bikini top holds breasts
So when you put a 2yo in bikini it DOES sexualise her as she is wearing a pretend bra

Yes, until around 8/9 or even later depending on development.

The only things that sexualise children are perverts.

A two piece is so so much easier for changing a nappy, but I would go for something bigger just to reduce the amount of suncream really.

Some 9 year olds wear bras. They are still children. And not sexual beings.

Bras are not just for adults . They are fir little girls too.

Toddlers shouldn’t wear bikinis because they don’t have breasts and do not need to cover them up.

it’s a pretend bra. Breasts are sexualised in our society unfortunately hence them being treated like ‘private parts’. When you put a pretend bra/crop top on a child (or design a bikini for a child) you are insinuating that they have parts to cover up.

Different if you are developing with breast buds- but tiny little things shouldn’t be wearing bikinis. Just the bottoms are more appropriate.

anyone who thinks this is a nudity/moral panic thing ‘it’s more coverage than a swimsuit!!!’ is spectacularly missing the point. It is sexualising a child to design or endorse an item of clothing for them, aimed to cover up a sexualised body part. (I feel terrible that breasts are seen that way- but they are)

I feel the same about seeing tiny girls wearing hijab completely unnecessarily.

Different if you are developing with breast buds- but tiny little things shouldn’t be wearing bikinis. Just the bottoms are more appropriate

Right and if you have had your toddler grow up thinking she is doing something by wanting to wear picture of ariel on her body because its " inappropriate " how the hell is she meant to feel about her body at 8/9 when she does jeed a bra?

Why are you making a child responsible for how adult men view adult breasts ?

Especially as a swim suit covers the sake area. As would a rash vest on girls or boys.

I don’t like little girls in bikinis tbh, I think it looks tacky

^Completely agree

@roastedsaltedpeanut

Nobody cares about the historical impact of bikini’s today. In the 1800’s and early 1900’s girls in shorts would have been controversial and thought of as sexual - should we also stop little girls wearing shorts now?

I wouldn’t put a child in a bikini, no. They’re for adult women and are often skimpy.

I wouldn’t put children in heavily gendered clothes anyway though, so I suspect we have different views on this.

Children should be allowed to be left alone in childhood - no makeup, heels or earrings in babyhood. I hate seeing girls being groomed to look like decorative ornaments.

Personally, my 3 year old is always in a sunsuit. That being said, the fear was put into me when someone near my dad's house flew a drone over the garden before she was born when the neighbours kids were playing naked in their paddling pool next door. It put the fear into me about not knowing who is watching them (maybe I'm extreme but it's a different world we live in now) she also seems to take the sun in easily so it offers that extra bit of protection.

If I'm not mistaken though, I do think I had a bikini swimsuit as a child and nobody battered an eyelid back then.

Essentially, I personally wouldn't be comfortable putting a bikini on my girl, however, I wouldn't make a point of moaning on about someone else putting one on their child. Certainly wouldn't talk about it being sexualising either, bit disturbing.

I think your critical thinking skills are bit off- and do at least quote my username.

Ariel is fuck all to do with it. A toddler doesn’t have breasts. They don’t have have anything to cover up. They shouldn’t need to cover up. Swimsuit designers suggest that they do by designing adult swimwear for literal babies.

Unfortunately- adult swimwear does cover the breasts because breasts are not seen as inoffensive baby-feeding parts, a natural body part like a hand or an elbow. They are seen as private. Sexual. Sexualised. It’s why our breastfeeding rates are so dire, because people believe boobs are for sex. This is a societal view, whether you agree with it or not. Strip off at your local Tesco and see if you can make it to the milk aisle without being accosted. Hence- adult women have costumes with a chest covering, as to not be indecent.

When the choices for boys are wearing trunks and a bare chest, but a rows of girls’ costumes with different chest coverings- the the implication is what that these tiny tots need to cover up. They absolutely do not. They do not have breasts.

To respond to the odd and irrelevant leap you made, I am certainly not making a child feel responsible for how adult men look at them. Any adult looking at a child for titillation is a paedophile. But unfortunately these perverts are everywhere. Just look at how many bloody schoolgirls get beeped on the way to school wearing their uniforms. Which is why a developing girl probably wouldn’t want to run around at a beach in just her bikini bottoms and there is a market for a top-and-bottom bikini.

I don’t know what point you are making- but if you are honestly suggesting you would let your daughter who was going through puberty run around a beach in her bikini bottoms because she shouldn’t ‘feel bad’ about having breasts, then you are lying. You know predators are everywhere as well as I do.

It depends on your outlook, the covering chest debate.
my girls wear swimsuits because it’s swimwear for girls. If I put them in trunks and then made them wear a swimsuit the moment they develop then they may get a message that their body is shameful. As it is it’s a simple message, these are clothes options for girls. Do I care if the run round without a top at 2- no, do I care if they wear a tank top- no.

I'd let a toddler wear a swimsuit she liked. That's all this is.

Its not some skimpy triangle thing bikini uts literally just a cropped vest.

Two pieces are really useful on the beach or of they are toilet training or need a swim nappy.

They are also useful for people like me who's top half is smaller than the bottom half and I can mix and match bottoms . Usually i buy shorts, and a bra style bikini top and a vest fir over the top so I get better support.

This thread shows exactly what this 2 year old has on her shoulders. The behaviour of men. Wonen who think she's tacky. Paedos who will gawp at her.

None of that is her fault. I hate this gender crap as much as the next person but they have their whole lives fir this discussion. I talk about these things with my kids.

What i don't do is over analyse a bathing suit on a 2 year old who chose it because she liked the picture.

By all means email manufacturers and shops etc I've pointed things out plenty of times my self in emails. I have an anonymous one precisely for things like that.

Amd yes school girls get honked at. I have 2 of them. But they wear the uniform. Trousers long shirts blazers/cardigan or whatever. Nothing " skimpy "

My 15 year old gets barked at all the time akd yelled at out car windows.

The problem.is the behaviour of the men doing it. Not her body or her clothes

Trust me, my bikini isn’t skimpy!

Me too. If it was a bikini with a bra-like top, I don't like them on very young children, because they do not need to cover their breasts/nipples and at that age can just wear bottoms.