To be worried about paying into HIS mortgage

[Macbeth8]

have just paid a large sum into my partner's mortgage. I came into money and it was agreed I would contribute to the mortgage he had when I first movrd in.
Im having second thoughts.
Financially, is this advisable?
We are married with three kids. How do I protect this money that ive put in or is it too late?

If you register your home rights to the property, he will be informed. I wouldn't let that stop you though

Echoing what @Testina says about Form HR1. The solicitor should not have taken your name off the deeds without being satisfied that you had had separate legal advice at the time, and understood the implications.
Is the mortgage holder ( eg. BS/BAank)aware that you're living in the property again? It's a standard condition of a mortgage that anyone with an equitable interest in the property(which is what you have) needs to let the MH know.

@Daftapath is that right? I registered for my DM and DILs after reading about a scam where someone ( vicar?) lost his home when an imposter sold it without him knowing. Of course, I asked permission but used my email address for the alerts. There are no alerts so far, but I get an update every six months saying nothing's happened. Neither DM nor DILs have had anything from HMLR at all.

Speak to a solicitor and see if you can put a charge on the house for the amount you have put in. Protect yourself and your money.

I don't understand why you did this?
Did he force you or push you to do it?

I was notified by letter when my (now ex) H registered his home rights on my house during our divorce.
It was a huge palaver to remove him once the divorce was being finalised as I could not move forward with my mortgage until he had been removed. He had to sign another form to agree to removal.

You need to consult several solicitors and do what they tell you to do. Protect your money. I don’t understand why you did this without legal advice first!! Keep proof of your payment. Get something signed.

Why did you put the money in before getting legal advice OP?

If you’re married then you’re covered. Doesn’t matter if you’re not on the mortgage

Yes it does. He can sell the house, remortgage the house and spend all the cash or hide it, etc. OP has little claim to any of it.

If he decides you stay in the house with the children, he can refuse to pay the mortgage and you won’t be able to claim rent benefit because you won’t have a rental agreement - it could get nasty!

It doesn't matter whether your lump sum was in the house or in a savings account. It will all be included in the finances for a divorce.

If you divorce now, you will probably have made more profit putting that money into property than you would have got in a savings account so you're no worse off.

We had lots of work done on the house an extension, utility room etc that I asked for so it was always agreed I would pay for this. However,when the works were ongoing I hadnt received my money. So DH extended his mortgage to pay for it all..I agreed as soon as I got the money I would just pay in.
I didnt really think anything of it as the extension and all the works were my idea so thought this was fair.
Its his behaviour now that is starting to worry me and made me have doubts.
I am probably naive but as a married couple I was like people have pointed out "contribute"

Can I ask this question then please- now ive put a large sum of money into the house should I pay for any bills? Or contribute in any other way?

You are married and therefore both protected from someone getting half the house and keeping their whole inheritance.

Of course you should contribute!

But I expect it would be easier to advise if you actually told us what was going on.

For example, are you feeling pressured (or bullied) by him to return to paid work, but you want to stay a SAHM and see that as “other contribution” and even if he doesn’t then you still should be allowed to because you just paid for the extension?

You made it sound like you’d just paid off some outstanding equity, which is not the same as paying for an extension you wanted.

Honestly I expect the answer here is that you should be talking to a solicitor about divorce.

No I work parttime now and earn less than a grand that mostly goes on food, childrens clothes etc
He earns 45k a year so is paying all the bills. But I contribute to all the works on the house that need doing..is this fair?
I just dont think Id be able to pay much more than I am doing - I pay for my own insurance, petrol, upkeep on car etc then food on top as well as needs of children like recreational activities.

The extension was a joint idea..I just mean I asked for certain things such as a utility room as the house was considerably small and I always agreed I would pay for it all..it cost over 70 grand so alot of my savings have gone in the house..I dont have any savings anymore so do I still contribute?

Surely this is something you discussed when you got married? Or back together?

Do both of your earnings go into a joint account? Or do you have separate accounts and you pay for all food, childrens clothes/etc?

Yes separate accounts. No joint account since weve been together as thats the way he wanted it.

Im just after advice really..I feel I shouldnt contribute anymore because how much ive contributed already.

He will be notified if a homes rights notice goes on by the land registry. Get some legal advice and try to get a trust restriction on the register

This like getting blood out of a stone!

You are married, you have 3 children together. For me the start point for contribution is that both parent’s income and assets (his house, your inheritance) is shared and you have equal access to it and equal say over it. Then from that start point, you consider any reason why it might not be equally shared, but still be fair.

So what is your current arrangement, who isn’t happy with it, and why?

There are clearly massive issues in your relationship. I think it would be unwise to cherry pick one question where the answers might be given as they apply to a healthy relationship. That’s why I think you’re should be more clear.

also,

His behaviour recently has been questionable. I am trying to get my ducks in a row if the worse comes to the worse.
Hes recently changed, not long after I paid thr money into his mortgage account. Call me paranoid, but this has given me serious doubts about the whole thing.
Also he is law enforcement and has mentioned he has many connections in high places, i.e such as solicitors etc.

It seems you have a history of naive and ill thought-out financial decisions

Get some proper advice, fgs

Also, I don’t understand why you would have zero savings, 3 kids, a dodgy marriage and a part time low wage - and then blow a HUGE amount on home improvements.

I cannot get my head round not getting what you needed /wanted (?) for £50K, then having a proper rainy day sum of £20K. Enough to walk out tomorrow and house you and your kids for a year, plus pay a solicitor for a divorce. It’s not a bad thing to put money into a house. But to leave yourself with no savings? I don’t understand that at all.

Because that was the agreement.
It all came up to around 80k so he jas stil technically paid more. Im talki g about mahor renovations, a brand new drive, two story extension, new windows etc. It all adds up.
Its because I didnt contribute to any bills etc so I decided to contribute to the house in itself instead of monthly bills which I would struggle with as I have a low monthly income. And Im used to my monthly outgoings..
I have enough money if I lost my job for instance I could live off the money for a few months until I found a new one.
But when I say savings I mean the money I came into I paid the large sum into his mortgage

Im not understanding your comment about 3 kids? We have 3 kids as many married couple do? Why is this an issue?

You have a relationship that has a history where at one point you never wanted to see him again. Right now, you don’t trust him.

So, if you had to leave him, you’d need to house your kids and support yourself and them. When you’ve have 3 kids, that’s harder than 2 or 1.

• they cost more


• you’re more likely to struggle to fit work around them

So the relevance of 3 kids is that you’re in a marriage with a man you don’t trust, have no mutually agreed and accepted way of managing your joint finances, have low earnings, and yet you’ve pissed away £70K and left yourself with very little savings.

Obviously not completely pissed away as you have increased the value of the house. But you can only access that value through a divorce.

You’re vulnerable, had an amazing opportunity to have a safety net, and just gave it up. For a nice new drive.

You either need to speak with your husband about how you're splitting finances. Get a joint account that both of your earnings go into and use that pot for everything. Or keep your separate accounts but agree that you each pay a % into joint household bills that's based off what you each earn.

OR (and based off the vague details you've given, I'd think the right thing to do) Go speak with a solicitor and get your ducks in a row for a divorce. Including getting a full time job.