Would you judge a friend who’s preschooler

[Isitjustmoi]

(NC)
had already had 3 fillings?

I dunno really. My DS has discolouration on his two front teeth. Dentist said not to worry but that was last year (he was supposed to go to the dentist last week but he had a horrible cough and the next appointment is August). She also said it won't really get better🤷‍♀️we brush his teeth twice a day, he's never drank anything but water and milk and he doesn't eat sweets.

Would you judge me?

Unless you 100% know the full story, can you really judge?

It irritates me when posters proudly announce, "teeth brushing is non-negotable; I pin mine down". You can't force a toothbrush around a child's clamped down mouth without doing more harm than good. If you can pin your child down to brush their teeth without doing damage to their mouth, teeth, and gums, they're not actually resisting.

My child had two fillings, the dentist gave me an explanation that was nothing to do with diet or lack of care. No other problems ever since.

Twats will judge anything. Sensible people know there is variation in all things, including teeth.

And to add to this, if your child is resisting toothbrushes (or other hygiene measures) due to sensory issues or other neurodevelopmental issues then you're making it worse by pinning them down and forcing it on them. You're reinforcing the fear, disgust, and aversion that makes them not want to do it in the first place.

No because it can be to do with being prem or other health conditions

No, because I'm not an arsehole.

My sister was absolutely obsessive about her DCs' diet and tooth brushing. Her DS1 has weak tooth enamel and early fillings anyway

No. The only thing I judge parents for is when they are physically rough with their kids or swear at them. That makes me depressed and murderous in equal measure.

Judging is pointless really.

This. We always went every six months prior to covid. My 6yo was last seen in the autumn of 2019 and was due to go just after the pandemic started. Our surgery have done absolutely no check ups since the pandemic started; it has been emergency treatment only. They’ve just started again now but are in a massive backlog. We are booked in for 2023. I’m really upset by it but what can you do?

No I wouldn't! I know dentists say that sugar etc.. contributes to fillings and other teeth problems, and I am careful with my children's teeth. However, I do also think genetics and other issues can cause poor teeth.

I was neglected as a kid, ate loads of rubbish, and continue to treat my teeth badly as an adult (sweet tooth! Tea and coffee drinker, occasional tobacco!) But I have perfect teeth. Never had a filling or any dental treatment whatsoever in my life, and the dentist always praises me for 'looking after' my teeth (even though I don't!!) Only ever had check ups! No work ever done!

DH has crap teeth, loads of treatment done, but he eats v v healthy and has no bad habits! I really think a lot is genetics!

No because sometimes it's really just bad luck or a genetic issue. Then again, I've grown up knowing this; one of my cousins is really strict with his dental hygiene & sugar intake after getting 2 fillings by his early 20s... but he's still had a few more and the dentist says he's just got weak teeth. His twin is fine. Similarly a cousin on the other side of the family has no enamel on his teeth- we think it was to do with my auntie's pregnancy as his sibling is fine and so is everyone else. My dad looks after his teeth but puts in about half my mum's effort and has less dentistry to show for it. He has decent teeth and gums, whereas she gets better dental hygiene scores but has weaker gums that require more management.

The only time I'd judge is if people admitted to not caring about their child's teeth and factors that affect them; like Honey Boo Boo style sugary go go juice on the go all the time with a sweetie chaser, and had lots of fillings.

No, I wouldn’t judge. I have 3 dc-2 have perfect teeth so far, the eldest has terrible trouble with teeth, including an extraction at aged 6. Eats well, cleans teeth, mouth wash, floss etc.

I'm a dental hygienist. Eldest needed four fillings at aged 7 or 8.

Youngest is fine.

The people saying they would judge are arseholes. A lot of my teeth rotted as a child due to the amount of medication I needed.

Keep your bloody noses out is all I can say. Busybodies!

If wonder why filling baby teeth

If you judge someone on that, you're a dick.

I had 5 teeth out at age 5.

I'm 31 now; I'm now getting ready for an upper denture plate to replace 4 removed adult teeth, with yet more fillings in others. I brush and floss every day and have nothing but crumbling teeth to show for it.

It's so depressing because I'll never afford one's that screw in, etc so I'll be wearing a bloody denture for the rest of my life when my mates who drink wine, and smoke, and hardly brush have such beautiful, natural smiles.

There really is a lot of genetics and luck. And I second PPs who say you really shouldn't pin your kids down and force them as you'll create a fear response every time. When they're old enough they'll avoid doing it.

I've always hated brushing my teeth and even now I'll do it for just a few seconds and sometimes only once a day instead of twice. I just absolutely hate the feel of a wet scratchy toothbrush and the taste of any toothpaste makes me gag (tried dozens, herbal and all). However I've never had any cavities or fillings. Dentists have told me it's because I don't eat sweets or drink sweet drinks (I don't have a zero sugar diet but I guess lower than average) but I reckon it's just that I'm lucky.

I know plenty of other people who brush their teeth perfectly, for the right number of minutes, and even watch their sugar intake, but still have plenty of teeth problems. There's a lot of luck involved imo

This, exactly.

My youngest had 2 crowns by the time he was 4, he has asd and spd. He's actually pretty good with teeth brusing diet wasn't great but not particularly sugary. He's my 4th and the others teeth have all been fine

No I wouldn’t judge unless I knew for certain that said friend fed their preschooler a diet of full sugar coke and haribos for breakfast lunch and dinner.

I pin my toddler down to brush their teeth if they keep refusing, but I am also aware that there are many medical conditions, medications and trauma that can cause brittle teeth. Yabu to judge. Mind your own business.

No because my daughter had a condition that meant she had no enamel on her baby teeth so I understand why some children are susceptible to tooth decay.

No. Because there are lots of reasons other than juts poor dental care, and also because I'm not a judgmental git.

You're reinforcing the fear, disgust, and aversion that makes them not want to do it in the first place

Indeed. DD1 who hated having her teeth brushed has no fillings whereas DD2 who didn't mind it at all has had one or two.

Had to get creative with DD1 and play dentists. Or get the cat to brush her teeth. Fortunately our very patient, cuddly cat didn't mind "holding" the toothbrush in her paw. 😻 The things we think of in desperation!

My son's baby molars are mostly metal caps. He had poor mineralisation of his molars. His brother has the same (pretty strict) dental hygiene and has no fillings.