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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not want to buy drugs for my mother any more???!!!

63 replies

hopefullynotintheshit · 11/01/2008 11:20

Namechanged for obvious reasons!

In my younger irresponsible days I was a bit of a toker, in fact I smoked every day and grew my own - I was quite keen on the stuff! My mum is an eccentric character and always loved a smoke too.

Anyway, that was a few years ago now. I gave it up when I got pregnant and never got into it again due to bfing / co-sleeping. DH still smokes a bit but in the back garden after dc in bed.

Mum moved abroad three years ago, to a remote mediterranean island, and she can't find anyone to supply her there. So since she moved out therte I have been sending her parcels every now and again in the post.

So far this has worked ouy okay, although since dc came I have become more and more uncomfortable about doing it.

But she is going through a v stressful time at present - her dh, my stepdad, is having chemo for cancer.

She just rang today to tell me that the latest parcel was intercepted by customs! The stuff was removed and replaced by a note. There was nothing linking us to the parcel so fairly sure we are safe.

But she had a big go at me on the phone saying I didn't wrap it up properly! I just said that I was sorry, I would do a better job next time although I don't have much spare time these days for endless wrapping.

I am so pissed off and just want to stop doing it. But I feel bad because she is going through a hard time and probably could do with a smoke!

OP posts:
foxinsocks · 11/01/2008 11:21

what did customs do? They will probably be on the look out for parcels to her from now on.

If she really wanted it, she could grow it herself.

You, on the otherhand, could be done for dealing and you really don't want to go down that road, especially now you have a family.

NoIHaventChangedMyName · 11/01/2008 11:22

couldn't you tell her your supplier is stopping and you don't know anyone else?

Tortington · 11/01/2008 11:22

now one parcel has been intercepted i would be very dubious about sending another

justabouttosplashoutinthesales · 11/01/2008 11:25

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HairyIrene · 11/01/2008 11:28

mediterrean island, eh?
perfect
send her a book to grow her own imho
it is a weed after all..
this is tres risky i would never do this or have it done to me...

hopefullynotintheshit · 11/01/2008 11:35

I was thinking about sending one more, really cunningly packaged, and saying that's the last one... so she has something to indulge in during stressful moments iyswim

OP posts:
Flocci · 11/01/2008 11:41

YANBU and I hope you rmum appreciates you rather than having a go at you for not packaging it properly!

Persoanlly i would say OK to her and then not send anything ( I think the risk for you is not worth taking ). When the parcel you didn't ever send seemingly fails to arrive tell your mum it was found by customs and returned to your post office or something like that and hopefully she will get spooked and realise that this is a serious thing she asked you to do.

ninedragons · 11/01/2008 11:42

What did the note say, out of interest?

I wouldn't send another. One parcel could be unsolicited, another would get her into trouble.

She's got enough on her plate without dealing with an importation/trafficking charge.

I don't think there's anywhere on earth you couldn't buy it if you looked hard enough.

rebelmum1 · 11/01/2008 11:43

If I were you I would stop - I know mother's are really good at guilting us to do things but this really takes the biscuit. Just say no. I am sure there are company's out there who do post, she could try one of those instead of risking you getting into trouble.

foxinsocks · 11/01/2008 11:43

Are you for real? You are dealing! ANd I promise you, if customs/the police are on to you, they will not see it any differently!

Don't send her any more!

lol at cunningly packaged. Do you think most drug dealers send them in a packet marked 'DRUGS'? They've found one, they may well be on the look out for another.

captainmummy · 11/01/2008 11:48

FFS!!! Do you want to go to jail? And so will your mum - think yourself lucky they haven't already knocked your doors down.

colditz · 11/01/2008 11:48

There are countries in which you could lose your life for doing this - does she know the magnitude of what she is asking you to do???

Avizandum · 11/01/2008 11:49

Is this a wind up??!!

If not, you are mad!! You are dealing drugs and as such could end up in prison....and I am sure any mother would not ask her daughter to do this......

moljam · 11/01/2008 11:51

i think youd be extremly silly to send another and your mum would too for letting you!yanbu to not want to !

lulumama · 11/01/2008 11:51

are you nuts?

seriously, you send drugs through the post ???? WTF?????? you are supplying drugs , therefore you are dealing, in the eyes of the law

am amazed you even have to ask the question

if your mum needs a smoke that bad, let her buy it

or grow it

if she needs to smoke to relax, and get through the stress, maybe she should look at other ways to deal with stress, ways which won;t land her daughter in prison or at the least in deep shit

LilRedWG · 11/01/2008 11:53

You would be crazy to send another!

jumpingbeans · 11/01/2008 11:54

lol at foxinsocks, big sticker, "no drugs in here".

SoupDragon · 11/01/2008 11:55

You are a f*cking idiot.

bran · 11/01/2008 12:02

Send her seeds (which I don't think is illegal). It would grow well as a house plant in a mediterranean region, if she puts it somewhere that it gets plenty of sunlight but can't be seen from the outside she shouldn't have any problems.

An ex-colleague of dh's went to prison after he posted drugs to himself from abroad (he was young and foolish ). I think she could find herself in trouble with the police for receiving drugs, especially if they have already stopped it once.

hopefullynotintheshit · 11/01/2008 12:13

ok, fair enough, comments about me being a fucking idiot aside, I did say I didn't want to do it any more!

I was just feeling a bit mean picking this difficult time to get arsey with her. I wondered if you guys thought I should be a bit more considerate of the fact her husband has cancer and she is stressed.

But obv not!

OP posts:
Mommalove · 11/01/2008 12:14

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lulumama · 11/01/2008 12:14

there are other ways you can support your mother at this difficult time, without risking your freedom

send her some vouchers for a freaking spa day !!

anything that will not have the possibility of landing you in prison

pyjamagirl · 11/01/2008 12:15

trip trap

Avizandum · 11/01/2008 12:15

I am sure we all appreciate that your mum may be having a difficult time, but IMO that is no excuse for asking you to break the law, potentially end up in jail, or worse.

FWIW I hope your mum starts to feel better soon.

Mommalove · 11/01/2008 12:16

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