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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Small glass of wine 🍷

115 replies

Meowykitten · 08/05/2022 20:41

a guy I have been dating poured me a glass of wine.
I said to him ‘that glass of wine is small’ - he said
’Well I do not want you to get any fatter’. Smirked. And handed it to me.
I was so shocked I did not say anything.
😞

I have a normal BMI (not that it matters) and I go yoga and gym. He also asked me during our 2nd date ‘How many times do you go to the gym’ - whilst looking me up and down, smirking. I was a bit surprised but I just said 3/4 times per week… I missed a massive red flag there didn’t I. 😔

OP posts:
Original poster
Meowykitten · 08/05/2022 21:58

BaaMoon · 08/05/2022 21:56

I would otherwise he'll come back at you with vile abuse.

Show quote history

He will probably be so surprised I had the audacity to dump him. This one appears very sure of himself. Arrogant, cocky, delusional and entitled to a woman with 15% body fat.

OP posts:
Giraffesandbottoms · 08/05/2022 21:58

You should have told him you needed the larger glass (and then a bottle) in order to make him less ugly and also more interesting!

dump!

Original poster
Meowykitten · 08/05/2022 22:00

Justcallmeanatm · 08/05/2022 21:57

OP please say you have not messaged him yet. Please ask on here for advice on how to word it so it shows him up and NOT that you are upset. I have read some brilliant advice in comebacks here, unfortunately I am not very good. Xx

I have not messaged him at all. I have not heard from him all day.

I was just going to say ‘I do not think we are compatible and I do not want to see you again’

OP posts:
glukoo · 08/05/2022 22:02

If you work with him you do need to message. I'd just say "thanks for the dates, but it's not working for me. Take care" whilst I would want to be shitty if I had to see him in work I'd kept it pleasant.

Original poster
Meowykitten · 08/05/2022 22:03

glukoo · 08/05/2022 22:02

If you work with him you do need to message. I'd just say "thanks for the dates, but it's not working for me. Take care" whilst I would want to be shitty if I had to see him in work I'd kept it pleasant.

We work same field, different buildings so may come across each other professionally.

OP posts:
bigmumsRbootyful · 08/05/2022 22:04

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grapewines · 08/05/2022 22:06

bigmumsRbootyful · 08/05/2022 21:50

cant believe youd be offended thats just silly. id have carried it on.

Then you need some self-respect.

SkirridHill · 08/05/2022 22:08

@bigmumsRbootyful Not bullying to call you out on your utter bullshit. Silly sod.

Original poster
Meowykitten · 08/05/2022 22:09

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Are you him?!

(Biggest thread plot twist ever)

OP posts:
springbreak22 · 08/05/2022 22:16

Thread has taken an odd turn...

disconnected101 · 08/05/2022 22:17

Meowykitten · 08/05/2022 21:15

I dont know.

without sounded concieted I am younger than him and I am so much nicer than him? (He seems to always get into trouble at work with colleagues whereas I worked same place for 10+ years with no drama). I also am in a higher position at work.

Show quote history

Be glad he showed you who he is so early on.
If I were you I'd just block & not engage at all. If he started questioning you & gets any 'feedback' he may well change his tactics with the next poor woman he goes on a date with. Though from the sounds of it he is an arrogant bastard who doesn't give a fuck how he makes women feel.
Be glad he wasn't stealthier & more manipulative. It could have been months of gaslighting & low-key negging & grinding you down.

As for what you've said above, it's text book isn't it?
An inadequate bloke can't handle being faced with a more successful woman.

PonyPatter44 · 08/05/2022 22:18

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Hardly bullying to call a knob a knob!

Drame · 08/05/2022 22:22

Good for you OP! Let him sit and wonder why you could possibly have broken up with him.

TheOriginalEmu · 08/05/2022 22:23

Pour a larger glass of wine…then drown him in it.

Original poster
Meowykitten · 08/05/2022 22:23

Drame · 08/05/2022 22:22

Good for you OP! Let him sit and wonder why you could possibly have broken up with him.

He wont care TBH
no respect in general and clearly did not care if he lost me by the way he spoke to me

OP posts:
FabFitFifties · 08/05/2022 22:25

You are a threat to his superiority. In every way, by the sounds of it. You are very lucky he has revealed his true self so soon.

HeArInGhandsgirl11 · 08/05/2022 22:26

Awful OP! Bellend!

What's negging?

TheOriginalEmu · 08/05/2022 22:30

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I’m surprised your mum hasn’t taken your phone off you and told you to go bed because you have school tomorrow.

TheOriginalEmu · 08/05/2022 22:32

Negging is the practice of giving backhanded compliments and generally making comments that express indifference toward another person (usually a woman) in an attempt to seduce that person.
@HeArInGhandsgirl11

HeArInGhandsgirl11 · 08/05/2022 22:38

TheOriginalEmu · 08/05/2022 22:32

Negging is the practice of giving backhanded compliments and generally making comments that express indifference toward another person (usually a woman) in an attempt to seduce that person.
@HeArInGhandsgirl11

Thank you!

Iamnotamermaid · 08/05/2022 22:41

Definitely one to ditch- he will just keep dragging you down.

Just Message 'bye, I'm moving on. Have a nice life. Wine'. Then block

PortalooSunset · 08/05/2022 22:43

I'd call him a cunt @Meowykitten but I suspect he lacks the warmth and depth! You're well rid.

Sorrynotsorry2 · 08/05/2022 22:55

Just tell him to fuck off

surprisedinner · 08/05/2022 22:57

I still can't believe there was a second date

Hohofortherobbers · 08/05/2022 22:59

I second the message "I choose wine" and block