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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Odd door behaviour. AIBU to be a bit frightened?

141 replies

GrumpyLovegood · 05/05/2022 20:56

Firstly I am absolutely not suggesting anything woo is going on. I am very very not woo-minded.
A couple of nights ago I went upstairs to check on dd7, who had gone to sleep in our bed. As I passed her bedroom door I heard a thud from inside. The door was closed tight and I thought the cat might be closed in there. But I had my hands full so went on into our room to drop off the clothes I was carrying. Dd was fast asleep and the cat was snoring peacefully next to her. I went back onto the landing intending to go into her room to investigate and found her bedroom door wide open and the light on. I went in and saw nothing out of the ordinary but was a bit freaked out. Decided something must’ve fallen off her bed for some reason although the room was completely still, no open window or anything. DH was downstairs.
Last night something woke DH at 3am. He got up for a wee, passing dd’s closed bedroom door on his way to the toilet. When he came out of the bathroom, dd’s door was wide open. He spent the rest of the night in her bed as he felt unsettled by it.
Cat was asleep on our bedroom floor.

So what is going into?
it’s not a draughty house though it is old. No other pets and cat is old and doesn’t bring home critters any more.

OP posts:
Rewritethestars1 · 05/05/2022 22:40

Its you op. I do this sort of thing all the time. I'm tired and overworked so I often have so much on my mind I do stuff on auto pilot and forgot. Il turn lights on unnecessarily and leave stuff in random places. I know your dh saw the open door but its probably that he missed it when going in the bathroom and then had the suggestion in his head from earlier so put two and two together subconsciously.

Jedsnewstar · 05/05/2022 22:48

I’m not scared you’re scared!

Have you walked past the door to test the wonky floorboards theory.

Dementedswan · 05/05/2022 22:58

Light sleeper who knows they should be asleep, hears something so puts light on and opens door to look, then pretends to be asleep 🤷‍♀️ dh and I cant have a conversation downstairs because they trying to get to sleep.

blinder · 05/05/2022 22:58

Not massively woo myself, but I shouldn’t have read this thread while I have a full bladder, lying in bed, with all the lights off on the landing.

EmmaH2022 · 05/05/2022 23:02

Seconding the sleepwalking possibilty.

Greyarea12 · 05/05/2022 23:05

GrumpyLovegood · 05/05/2022 22:14

Dd was definitely asleep in our bed the first time. I expect that if I hadn’t told dh about that he would not have been so unsettled when he saw it open.
The house isn’t big. Upstairs it’s a normal 3 bed semi with the bathroom at the back on a sticky out bit which would’ve been over the kitchen. But we extended downstairs so it goes back further than upstairs. On an evening, dh and I are in the new extension with the door closed on to the ‘old’ bit.
There is a big cupboard on the landing which I use as a wardrobe and has the boiler and loft hatch in it. The night I saw the open door I couldn’t sleep for thinking someone could be hiding in there.
We live in a village, but I usually lock the back door when I leave on a morning and dh works in the very front room (old living room). He would hear someone moving around the very creaky upstairs floors. The house is rarely empty except when we go out at the weekend.
For those saying woo, why would something happen now when we have been here for 6 years with nothing?
It has always felt like a safe, happy house.
On the night I couldnt sleep my mind went to awful places.
Dd is adopted. Her birth father was an angry violent man who was in prison when we adopted her as a baby. He made comments at that time that he would find his baby one day. You can imagine what I was thinking.
We are extremely careful and private. DD’s image has never been on social media and he knows nothing about us or where in the country we are. But still, nighttime darkness brings dark thoughts doesn’t it?
I hope it’s a rat! (a sentence I never thought I’d write).

I can only imagine the thoughts & anxiety you experienced that night with that in your head. I'm sorry you have to go through that kind of mental torture. I think its possible your dd fell asleep with the light on and the door opened on its own either with a change of temp or a whift of a draft. I think maybe a camera would be a good idea just to give you both peace of mind.

Mamapep · 05/05/2022 23:12

she’s sleepwalking or waking up briefly, being unsettled by you/your husband passing by

Watchkeys · 05/05/2022 23:18

@SuperFlyWoman

We all know ghosts don’t exist so try to work it out logically

How do we all know this? By what means?

NeedMoMoney · 05/05/2022 23:21

Burn the house!!!!! 👻👻👻

Original poster
GrumpyLovegood · 05/05/2022 23:27

Thank you so much for lots of reassuring posts.
I probably unnecessarily overshared a bit with regards to dd’s past but that’s where my mind went first, instead of perfectly reasonable explanations like wonky floorboards etc. Or woo, which would be preferable to my fears.
I don’t think it was dd, certainly not the first time as she was in another room. She also never pretends to be asleep - any chance to talk, she won’t pass up. If she is awake when we go to bed she lets us know!
The oddness was that there were two strange occurrences in two days having never had an odd door opening by itself, thuds, light on, dh waking in the night experience before.
Dh sleeps solidly. He never ever gets up in the night and he said “something woke me”.
Hopefully nothing more will happen but if it does we will be checking out any possible way that door could open with walking past it, closing other doors etc.
Then I will definitely consider asking dh to sleep in there with his phone on record!

OP posts:
Bizzlemizzle · 05/05/2022 23:27

This thread has just reminded me that me and my DP heard footsteps in our DS room (above us in the kitchen) the other night. We checked the camera instantly, fast asleep, but the motion detection was triggered, nothing on the recordings. We both even said it didn't sound like him, it just sounded different. No explanation for it, now I'm sat in the dark in the same room...I'm not scared...

We've had doors open, not fully wide open but open and we think its down to the frames and the doors been old and just warped and movement somewhere causing them to open or we are just that tired we didn't close the door properly.

I would personally give your whole house a once over, check around just to make sure there's nothing odd or rodents and get a camera or two set up (Maybe one in the room and one outside the room), ours cost us 25 from amazon and it's brilliant for the price.

Peppapig7262662 · 05/05/2022 23:32

A woman I know once had someone come out of her loft.

Turns out he was living there for nearly a year.

She only caught him leaving as she slept in one day and found him climbing out to use her toilet.

KettrickenSmiled · 05/05/2022 23:40

The light on bit is very odd.

Not if it was already on, but not visible to Op on her first pass of the door when it was closed.

KettrickenSmiled · 05/05/2022 23:43

piratehugs · 05/05/2022 21:07

I was going to ask about a loft too. Could someone be hiding/living in your loft? Or if a terrace, a neighbour coming through a shared loft space? Very unsettling.

This is definitely the answer, & the first thing you should consider OP.

👫👬👭
^^^^ = factual evidence of people in OP's loft^

KettrickenSmiled · 05/05/2022 23:46

romdowa · 05/05/2022 21:08

I'd be freaked out too. The other night I was awake with the baby and heard the sound of my dog walking in the hallway. His nails make a very distinct sound on the lino. Partner went to check and said dog was in the living room fast asleep. I didn't sleep for the night 😨

Riiight.

Because it is absolutely impossible that by the time your DP got up, traipsed downstairs, & went to the living room, your dog could have beaten him to it ...

(dogs can fall asleep in 0.09 seconds btw)

KettrickenSmiled · 05/05/2022 23:47

GrumpyLovegood · 05/05/2022 21:15

We do have a loft but it has a tiny hatch inside a cupboard. It’s a semi (Victorian, we don’t share loft with neighbours).

Hobbit interlopers then. For sure.

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 05/05/2022 23:50

The thump was probably did turning over and bashing the wall, ds does it all the time.

Doors open all the time too- not shut properly and a draught.

Kat1953 · 05/05/2022 23:51

Peppapig7262662 · 05/05/2022 23:32

A woman I know once had someone come out of her loft.

Turns out he was living there for nearly a year.

She only caught him leaving as she slept in one day and found him climbing out to use her toilet.

F**k! 😦

KettrickenSmiled · 05/05/2022 23:52

The door could be wonky as it is an old house, but we’ve lived here for 6 years and it’s never done this before.
I have an original built-in cupboard in my old house's bedroom. Been here 5 years, & for 4.5 years it also had 'never done this before' - but this winter, it did.
That's not woo - it's circumstance.

But the door was closed tight when I first passed it. It does close tight, you need to twist the handle to open it.
Sometimes what seems a 'tight close' can kind of click itself loose, depending on whatever factors you can imagine affecting it - damp/dry weather, wind, or just plain 'it was about to click itself loose, & happened to do so at night, at a point when I was around to notice it.'

KettrickenSmiled · 05/05/2022 23:57

Sound of nails - could this one be a squirrel in the attic?

Yup. But fie on us for being sensible.

btw OP - YANBU for feeling a bit frightened. Unexplained things at night are unsettling. But just because you cannot find an immediate explanation, doesn't mean there isn't one. Most likely to do with squirrels, or a on/off failing door handle mechanism.

Ye Dogs, I am boring!

KettrickenSmiled · 06/05/2022 00:07

For those saying woo, why would something happen now when we have been here for 6 years with nothing?
Why would 'woo' operate to a logical human schedule?

It has always felt like a safe, happy house.
It still is. You & DH have made it so.

On the night I couldnt sleep my mind went to awful places.
Dd is adopted. Her birth father was an angry violent man who was in prison when we adopted her as a baby. He made comments at that time that he would find his baby one day. You can imagine what I was thinking.
Highly unlikely.l but understandable you will dwell here when unsettled & sleepless.

We are extremely careful and private. DD’s image has never been on social media and he knows nothing about us or where in the country we are. But still, nighttime darkness brings dark thoughts doesn’t it?
It sure does.
But these are just thoughts. Be sensible - why would her father 'break & enter' your home, see his DD there ... & then disappear? He'd have taken her with him. Because that would be his objective - there'd be no benefit to him in creeping around. leaving, & having to risk a return visit.

I hope it’s a rat! (a sentence I never thought I’d write).
Well done with the dry humour. Keep it up OP - you've been spooked by human imagination, not woo, & not stray ex-prisoners.

ShammyJammy · 06/05/2022 00:08

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 05/05/2022 23:50

The thump was probably did turning over and bashing the wall, ds does it all the time.

Doors open all the time too- not shut properly and a draught.

The DD is in OP bed. OP just walked past DD room and heard the thump.

Reading skills people!

It's either someone living in your loft or a Spirit. Both things to be terrified of 😂

Luredbyapomegranate · 06/05/2022 00:08

StaunchMomma · 05/05/2022 21:43

Wondering if it's the action of walking past the door that opens it - eg if the floorboard is a bit creaky and it has a knock on effect on the wonky door frame? Or if the opening/closing of another door nearby causes it to open?

I think this is likely.

Set up a camera if you worried. It’s going to be something dull though..

KettrickenSmiled · 06/05/2022 00:09

BadNomad · 05/05/2022 22:26

3am is peak time for paranormal activity. Spirits are at their strongest then.

🍾🍷🍸🍹👻💀

Wow!
Who measures & authenticates this activity @BadNomad - & more importantly, is there a spreadsheet?