To ask you to compare yourself from now to ten years ago?

[arizonacardinal]

10 years ago: I was jobless (couldn't hold down a job), no qualifications, drug taking, drinking, partying, having lotssss of unprotected sex, caught drunk driving, homeless, crashed car, 7.5 stone, no motivation, angry, aggressive, frustrated, depressed, alone, untrustworthy, parents crying all the time.

Today: 4th year uni, about to start my masters in social work, clean from all drugs, much rather stay at home with my daughter and animals on a weekend, new car, celibate 3 years, lovely home, 15 stone (not good), motivated, happy, surrounded by so many amazing people, trustworthy, parents proud of me.

I can't believe the difference that 10 years can make, and if someone had told me back then the life I would be living now I would not have believed them.

Any other sharers?

Wow I waffled on a lot there.

Same job, same house, same husband, same kids but they're at uni/school leavers now, same cat, same same same.

I reckon 10 years from now will be very different though, my parents are ageing and that's scary, I'll be retired too.

I think what's slightly depressing for me is how little has changed. Same house, DH, workplace, still slightly overweight. I do have a lot more self awareness I suppose, so that's good, and I guess all of the above are good things to have( apart from being tubby).

Had a newborn and two young kids . Sahm with lots of mum friends . Skint and knackered . Dh driving me mad in that postnatal hating husband way. Felt like the days were endless - lots of pottering around in cafes and playgrounds
Today kids all finishing primary and secondary school . I'm Working in a very stressful nhs role (looking to change areas ) things with dh much better and more money . No time though for anything and definitely don't have as many friends . Menopause looming . I do jog now and have given up meat .

Ten years ago I was happily married and both employed in professional jobs. DCs dong fine. Today single parent thanks to bereavement. DC want their dad back. Life sucks.

10 years ago I was 22, a single mom. A size 8. Studying at uni. Going out every few weekends when DD was at my moms. Bringing home men when I felt like it (when DD wasn’t home!) and happily in my own company the rest of the time. Loving life generally. struggling from Bulimia but cocky enough that it wouldn’t have any lasting effects. Loved in a tiny maisonette in a beautiful posh area.

now I’m 32. Married. Dd11 and DS2. Still suffering from bulimia but have ruined my health and my teeth and am now 12st instead of a slim size 8. I am happily married though for the most part and my kids are brilliant. Live in a nice 3 bed semi in an okay area. Not working since before pandemic and DS and crippled with anxiety.

Ten years ago I had a 24 mth old and a 6 mth old. I was so exhausted I don't really remember much about anything tbh.

Ten years on, life is good. Am older and fatter and still tired but enjoying my work and developing a second career. The last decade has been a period of huge personal growth. I'm so happy and blessed.

So sorry you and your children lost your DH / daddy 💐 🤗

Hope you be helped to bear the loss. Xx

And your house won't every betray you. You know where you stand with it.

10 years ago: mid-30s single and childless, happy in my job but really wanted a family of my own and felt lonely

Now: still single but Mum of two (DS8 and DD2) through adoption. I am in exactly the same job but working part time and no longer derive much pleasure from it as I struggle to juggle everything. I am permanently exhausted and constantly fighting to get extra support for my DS who has complex needs. Adopting my children was far and away the best thing I have ever done and they create moments of pure joy for me every day despite the stresses. I am pretty much the same size as I was then (too big). Overall, I feel very lucky and I feel that I am doing what I was always meant to do.

💕👊

I was young, madly in love, saving for a bigger house and family. In a job I disliked intensely but in the middle of a degree. Lots of friends, busy social life.

Now I'm middle age, I had a breakdown 4 years ago and still struggle with mental health. I've nursed my parents through end of life and I'm raising a Sen child. I have a nightmare dog and I work part time in a job I like. Few friends and limited social life.

10 years ago...married with a 1yo DD. Employed in a job in advertising. Over a stone lighter. Generally happy

Now...self employed in a job I love & am proud of. Have another DD. Still married and would say I'm happier in my marriage and myself. Definitely more confident & care less what people think.
I would like to shift that stone though

10 years ago in a loveless marriage
About to have career change
Probs having an emotional affair

Blissfully happy with new man
Still in new career path
About to move into new house
Currently at airport waiting to go to carribean

10 years ago - young/mid teen at school. Little geeky but good group of friends, pretty happy.

Now: midwife in a happy, stable relationship. Had some fairly wild years in between, definitely not as geeky now. Not very exciting unfortunately!

10 years ago - stay at home mum, unhappy marriage. Hardly any money, depressed and living in a rented cottage. Started anti depressants for awful mood swings. Constant arguments with dh. Drove shitty Ford

Now - happily remarried to an amazing man, have two kids. Teacher, no money worries, live on a farm! Haven't had an antidepressant for 3 years. Drive a brand new Range Rover. We don't argue!

Life is pretty good now but I couldn't have imagined it back then!!

Pregnant with what was to be my first child after four miscarriages, married to DH two years after being together 12 years, still loving him and generally being a good couple, living in London, working in the Olympic stadium on the run up to the event, about to have my world completely changed by becoming a mum.

Now - happily separated from DH, moved to a cool seaside town, single mum of 2, slim and fit again (after struggling with that when the kids were smaller), grabbing life with both hands. Still a really terrible cook.

10 years ago was so tough. I had a hateful boss and things at home were not great. I had the energy and interest in going out. I was in the midst of recovery. I had my most favourite house.

Now things are transient as I look for my new home, things at home are great and I'm financially comfortable and comfortable in my own skin. Much less energy though.

10 years ago I was an EU citizen.

10 years ago I was doing my PhD, had a boyfriend and was saving for our first home together.

10 years on I have a phd, a good job, I'm married to the then boyfriend, own a nice house and have 3 young children. I'm very lucky I'm still as slim as I was back then despite have 3 kids. I'm very happy with my outwardly mundane life, if slightly tired working ft.

10 years I was 7.5 stone, single, working full time and enjoying life. I was so full of energy. Now I'm nearing on 15 stone, married, work part time and have 3 children aged 6, nearly 5 and 8 months. I'm knackered all the time but beyond happy. I do need to lose weight though and have finally started to kick my arse into gear. I have everything a 16 year old me hoped for and it's soppy but I feel like I've found my purpose and have a good balance in life. I've always been so career orientated and whilst it's still important to me being my kids mum is the greatest joy and privilege.

10 years ago caring for my 30 year old disabled daughter. Today caring for my 40 year old disabled daughter. So no change really.

Generally happy, Ft job, plenty of spare funds for holidays and socialising, 2 D.C. living somewhere we liked, always active and doing stuff.

now 6mths to finishing a BA, 1 more D.C., one that didn’t make it, long term unemployed, no pension, no funds, chronic health condition, 20lbs heavier. Depressed, anxious, unhappy, no energy, little social life, no holidays or things to look forward to. Overall hopelessness.

ah well.

Not much difference really, except dc are teenagers and we relocated to the other end of the country (8 years ago). Nothing much else (work, marriage, hobbies, weight etc) has changed, which is generally good because I am happy with most things. Definitely want a new job though.

Well done to those of you who have turned your lives around!

10 years ago- married to a massive limp manchild, main breadwinner, stressful job, wifeworker, house admin person, at breaking point with 4 kids at home, eldest one disabled , twins and a newborn. No social or sex life.
Now- divorced, one child at home (older 3 grown up and left) better job, more salary/satisfaction. Ex is ok as a Co parent, 100% better than he was as a husband.
Do my own house admin, have social life with friends and lovely BF that i don't live with. Good sex life. Have beautiful cat (ex was allergic). I'm 50.