To think my DC is too clever for state secondary school?

[GeniusCreator]

DC is Yr7. Top of year according to what I’ve been told. Read the full series of Harry Potter books by 7 years old. Excels in STEM subjects. Spends ages at home researching science stuff like quantum field theory and nuclear fusion/fission and enjoys it! Designs his own websites and writes his own code for his own games. Primary school were always pretty amazed by him. Secondary school have picked up on him now and have said they’ve never seen anything like him.

He’s already mentioning being a bit bored in class. We live in what could be described as a deprived town and are not well off, no family to help out, so would never be able to get him into a private school. I did check with the private school in the next town but there are no scholarships available.

WIBU to try to crowdfund for private school fees?

He needs a much higher level curriculum than the state school one to continue stretching him. I honestly think he’s destined for amazing things.

<only slightly light hearted>

Giraffesandbottom

"But British private education is much worse, despite smaller classes etc., etc. Trust me

trust you, although you haven’t been personally, none of your children or grandchildren have been, and you are basing this opinion on your personal judgement of people who have attended private schools, seemingly based on a difference of political opinion? Ok then…"

No, not because of any political differences, or anything like that. Purely instrumentally, as I tried (but clearly failed, at least in your case) to make clear.

Or, in other words, well, Matthew 7:16 ...

(Oh, and this point is not based on an adherence to Christian metaphysics or any counter thereto. By the way.)

Erm isn’t Harry Potter written for little kids anyway?

I have a gifted almost 12 year old who is now at a selective grammar school. Although he could read and write from age 2, he is also autistic and we have to support all aspects of his development, not just the academic.

When my son was 3, his paediatrician warned me that gifted children are more likely to suffer mental health issues. My son had a breakdown age 4 and still has high levels of anxiety and emotional liability. I can’t trust him to cross the road safely and he can't tie his shoes.

He is however, proficient in 6 coding languages. His teachers are amazed at his ability, especially in STEM subjects, however, something I learned early on was that gifted children are not consistent. A bright child is diligent and works well, a gifted child can flounder in subjects that they are not interested in.

What we're your child's standardised scores in primary? That can show natural ability and not just willingness to learn?

My son, from the age of 7 partook in courses with a gifted child programme connected to a University. Even they expressed their amazement at his abilities. There are courses to be found online to stretch your child without interrupting their schooling.

My son is focusing on his social and emotional development, the academics are there. The school have offered to allow him to drop some subjects so that he can focus on the advanced STEM subjects but we haven't agreed yet.

I want my child to be happy, no matter how academically able he is. I already know that he will be a programmer, he already is, but if he has a mental breakdown or harms himself, it will all be moot.

Please remember that there is more to life than academics. Also, crowdfunding is not the way to go, you put in the effort at home but if your child is like mine, they already know their interests and will get to where they need to be with the right support

You have eight children all of whom have gone to or are at Oxford? Ok…

Thats the kind of stuff that would have been picked up by some rag like the Daily Mail surely ‘8 siblings all go to Oxford’ 🤣🤣

Yes exactly @Goldijobsandthe3bears 😂i need to see the DM link

My response was to OP’s claim of school ringing home to marvel at DC’s marvellousness.

If the DC is truly marvellous then I’d want the school to be proactive and calling parents in to see how the DC can be stretched and developed both at school and at home.

And no, no jealousy here at all - my DC are doing just fine.

My 16dd now goes to an Independent School, they have a resident tennis coach. Her old state school has a resident Police Officer, security fencing and random mobile phone searches. The girls wear trousers or propper shorts under their skirts in summer. They have to.

The turnover of teaching staff at her state school is shocking. Most teachers, new in post, leave after one year, some don't even come back after Christmas. Concequently class sizes were " generous". The max size for her now is 12 but usually 8. The usual reason teaching staff leave is to retire. There are 30+ applications for any vacancy, all from state schools. How do you think that translates into the standard of education or her "school experience".

Sure, there are some good States Schools but there are a lot of bloody awful ones too, who offer no to very little support, even to bright kids. Mine included.

The downside is cost. They are crazy expensive but if you can afford it, just do it.

I can see why you might want to send him to private school but honestly, crowdfundind will make you look like such a dick. If he's that much of a genius, once he leaves state school and gets into Oxbridge, he will excel in his chosen subject anyway.

@GeniusCreator Winchester College and Eton offer full burseries. Your son would ideally have a conditional offer in year 6 but Winchester would allow him to sit the Election ( Scholarship) exam in year 8 .If he is as brilliant as you say he might be in with a chance..Eton may also allow him to sit for the King's Scholarship without a conditional place but I"m not sure. There are lots of boys like your son at both these schools.

I don’t mean to brag but I accidentally bought the Scottish version of Harry Potter and the chamber of secrets so my son is now bilingual 😌

OP get him to a Mensa test, they have a kids division, my friend's daughter is a member and she's found it really supportive. Really clever kids can really benefit from meeting up together. School is just a base, encourage your son at home, look out for science competitions and other things he can do, summer programmes he can get a scholarship for, all that stuff, get him Rubik's cubing, etc, there's no guarantee private will be better for him.

Snoopsnoggysnog

"This just comes across as a massive chip on your shoulder about privately educated people"

Ha. Maybe it does. ( But some of my best friends were privately ... Perhaps unconvincing, albeit true.)

It is my experience, though, even of those I call friends. Yes, once again, what was it? -- Matthew 7:16. With or without chips.

😂😂😂😂😂. Hard hat on OP.

Serious note - if he is as smart as you say he is - he will flourish everywhere. Also - reading HP at 7 is not a sign of ‘intelligence’ - its a sign he can read. Loads of kids can read at that age OP.

Why would you write this? All kids are different and it's awful to say you'd prefer one kind over another.

You have eight children all of whom have gone to or are at Oxford? Ok…

Yes I do. Would you like to take on a bet for £1000. I'd be delighted :). People's reactions in rl are generally very positive, polar opposite to MN where they're....odd. Fine by me :)

As far as the Daily Mail goes, my DC are adamant that they will not have any newspaper article written about them preferably ever, and certainly not while any are still there, which they are. Any boasty article about a current undergrad tends to go down among their peers like a lead balloon. Distance is required if you're determined to have publicity. I think it's fair to say that they're the largest collective of siblings to get to Oxford so far, or at least since records began.

So either take on the bet or do less silly emoticons. None are genius, all are very bright, all are very normal in terms of social skills etc. None went to independent school, none was pushed up a year. Parents need to relax with bright kids not get in a fever about them. There are lots of bright kids out there.

The thing which is unusual is a) eight DC in the first place and then b) all bright and c) all going to Oxford.

Anyhow, the bet is on, yes?

🤣🤣🤣

You think 9-10 year olds would struggle with HP?! On which planet?! My 5 year old reads HP op. 😂 in fact, like your son, my other child finished all the HP’s by 7 as well. Do I think they are the next Einsteins? No. They can just read and they enjoy reading.

Fair to say that Oxford tutors seem astonished by the fact of that many too, but none has ever got snippy.

How can you access a bursary please?

Your FIVE year old does NOT read Harry Potter! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🙄

I don't think that @wantmy was expressing a preference for her own satisfaction. I got that she thought that her child would be happier and have a more satisfying life if they were less academically gifted, and more socially able and comfortable.

I think most of us would prefer our kids to be happy and socially confident, than super bright, if given an either/or choice.

I wanted to be a lexicographer when I was that age, off my own bat. Was reading Jane Austen. It's not that unheard of.

Yes they do. As said above, I've seen this, a child who understood what they were reading. End of reception.

Just because you don't believe it, doesn't make it untrue.

Your FIVE year old does NOT read Harry Potter!

this encompasses so much of what’s wrong with MN. Just because your 5 year old can’t, doesn’t mean someone else’s can’t!