to send money to a Moroccan taxi driver

[Autumnterm]

Back in 2018 I went to Marrakech on holiday with my son. I can’t remember exactly how but I ended up getting the phone number of a friendly local taxi driver who took us from A to B several times. When we went back the following year we used him for our airport transfers both ways.

Since Feb 2020 we haven’t travelled abroad anywhere but I would occasionally get a text from him saying hello or how are you, to which I would respond hello/salaam/labas and that was that. I didn’t think much about it except that he was checking in just in case I was headed to Morocco and was tempted to use another taxi driver....and I did at one point recommend him to a relative going there but their trip was recently cancelled due to COVID.

Anyway cut forward to this week. He texted again and said hello my dear friend how are you and your family, and I responded as usual.

But this time he went on to say that life is hard for him, he has had no work due to the collapse in tourism and as a result he cannot pay for his kids to go to school. He sent me a picture of them - a boy and a girl, they look to be about 3 and 5 years old so I presume he means nursery school.

Stupidly (maybe) I asked how much was school and he said €90.

He has since sent me several texts asking if i will help pay for his kids to go to school. His English is not perfect but it sounds like he wants €30 a month for three months and he says in return if/when we go back he will drive us anywhere we want.

On one hand I know that Marrakech is one of the scam cities of the universe (lots of the people who run investment scams targeting UK pensioners are actually based there). I have no way of knowing if the kids in the photo he has sent me are really his and if there really is a charge to go to school and if he really has no work.

On the other hand €30 is affordable for me and I genuinely do feel sorry for people who rely on tourist revenue who have had a very hard time of it over the last two years. Morocco is open for tourists now but it was locked down for the whole 2020 season and some of 2021.

Would I BU to send him some €?

He saw you coming a mile off.

You can't cure stupid

This is a great idea. Make it clear that this is a one off gift and you will not be making further donations. It's your money and your choice what you spend it on.

You are being 'groomed' except it's by text rather than online.

The longer you allow this conversation to continue with this man, the more open you are to more serious issues. He may turn nasty and threaten you if you pay him something now, but refuse to in future. You would never know if he had tracked you down, knew your address, said he had 'friends' who would pay you a visit.

You are not special to him, only as a means of scamming you.
He and his friends are likely to be doing this to other gullible women.

I wonder how many men he's asked?

Hmmm...that's your answer!

@MapleMay11 Do you make a habit of telling women to give money to unknown men who are clearly scamming them?

Do you actually believe he has children? Or this is for their education? Or that the photos of them are really them?

@FeathersMcGee Why do you presume their mother does not work outside the home? Most Moroccan women work, although of course they don’t get paid as much as men.

@JinglingHellsBells Don’t patronise me. Euros are not the official currency but they are very widely used in Morocco, like USD in Mexico. I don’t know if the school charges in EUR or MAD but he probably thought I would instantly understand a cost in EUR better. Which is true.

I make a judgement based on the information provided.

And that's where I'd leave it. Perhaps every word in his original requests was true, perhaps it was all lies and he's only backing off now because he knows you did some checking. My guess it's somewhere between the two. Let the matter drop and hope he doesn't ask you again. You can still help the country if you want to, just look up charities or contact organisations here who can put you in touch with reputable ones over there and arrange to make a donation that way.

@Autumnterm I think your solution is great.

It's not patronising you to make a statement of fact.

Considering we don't use euros, why didn't he convert to sterling or even dollars?

You are being scammed. Sorry that you cannot see it.
A promise of free taxi rides sometime never...
And sob-story photos of some children.

Do you genuinely believe all of that?

I dont understand the dilemma?
It's your money do what you want.
You know the risks and you're old enough to earn money and old enough to spend it.

Perfect response.
One of the pillars of Islam is Ramadan and at the end of Ramadan it's expected to donate money to charity in proportion to what you have. However in Morocco people don't donate to official charities, they give to the mosque who feed the hungry OR they give direct to people they know are in need. There is no sense of pride about not accepting charity as it's an expected part of their culture.

I am sickened by the people insisting this is a scam. It's not a scam, it's a desperate poor person seeking help in difficult circumstances from what he perceives as a likely source. Yes it's cheeky, yes it's presumptuous but it's also almost certainly completely on the level. He may be using school fees as a pretext because he thinks you're more likely to help with this but regardless, he will be in need.

So drug addicts are scum but not wanting to give money to randomers makes you a cunt? Maybe look at how you’re talking about people.

I think giving it as a gift might give you more closure on it. Personally I wouldn’t give this type of gift because I don’t have that type of money to lose, but also because I’d worry it will open the floodgates. If he can’t afford school now how will he afford it next term? Will you be paying it again?

Perhaps every word in his original requests was true, perhaps it was all lies and he's only backing off now because he knows you did some checking. My guess is it's somewhere between the two. You could let the matter drop and hope he doesn't ask you again, but be aware that he might do so in a few weeks. It's much harder to say no after you've said yes, so ask yourself this - do you want to start something that could have him asking for more money for other things? You don't know the children are his and no matter how well-meaning you are, you won't want to be plagued by requests. I would reply back saying that you're sorry he's having a hard time but you're not able to send him any money, so you wish him well in finding work. Block him if he asks again - I guarantee that if you return you'll find another taxi driver just as friendly as he was. You can still help the country if you want to, just look up charities or contact organisations here who can put you in touch with reputable ones over there and arrange to make a donation that way.

Nobody should come onto MN expecting cuddles and pats on the back, certainly not me. But I think some of the abuse has got a bit out of hand, and this thread is perhaps now outliving its usefulness.

I work in an industry where we are trained to spot scams, am one of the most suspicious people I know, and am always warning other people that they are being scammed (eg my poor neighbour, who was about to give even more to scammers before I intervened). I am grateful for the concern of those of you who are worried about scamming and of course I have considered the possibility that this is a scam.

HOWEVER

1. I am fortunate and I can help people who are less fortunate. It is not a massive amount of money and I don’t want or expect anything back from this guy.

2. my instinct is that he is legit and does not make a career out of scamming Westerners. A whole host of reasons, including: I’ve met him in person multiple times; what he says about pre-schools and the state of tourism there at the moment seems to stack up according to those on here with the knowlege; he just supplied me straight away with his driving licence when I asked for it, and it’s in his name; that he hadn’t got a Scooby about the logistics of how I should send him a gift; that in four years he hasn’t once asked for money or anything at all.

3. psychologically I can understand why he might out of the blue ask for money at this time. It’s towards the end of Ramadan and people are hungry, business is poor and spirits are flagging. They are going into their third season of few or no tourists. His kids are now of the age when they need education and he is unable to provide for them. I can see why someone might be too proud to ask for money for themselves but not for their kids.

4. I am quite capable of saying no if he comes back asking for more. I am not going to be in Chat or Take a Break - not for this reason anyway.

And I’m looking forward to seeing a picture of him and his family at their feast on Monday.

I don't know why the OP bothered to post in the first place, she was clearly determined to give the money anyway and has completely ignored everyone's input and the overwhelming poll result... 🤷🙍

OP, you have been extremely gracious in the face of some rather nasty comments. I still think you should not send the money- I have said why in detail- but I can understand why you are going ahead.

Say for example, this taxi driver is saying the same to ten different women and each send him £30 a month.
That's £300 per month.
Not a bad little earner, where do I sign?

“”.

I am sickened by people saying that this is not a scam. Of course it’s a scam. And the more people who fall for these types of scams, the more scammers will keep scamming innocent people.

The people on here prepared to give money to scammers are essentially scammers themselves because they are perpetuating an industry.

If my DP wanted to give family money to someone pulling this kind of sob story it would change the way I think about him, and would make me think very carefully about not combining finances with him in future.

@AlternativePerspective

What evidence might convince you it is not a scam?

Maybe in your work you use better judgement than in your personal life OP.

Think of all the fares this taxi driver has had since you went to Morocco.
But he's chosen you to beg from. It's 4 years since you went there, and 3 since your last trip. But he's kept up the contact. So if you return you only use him. Can you imagine this happening in the UK, from a cab driver?

You say you can't remember how you got his number. Like it somehow dropped into your phone. I bet he can. You have been set up.

Do you feel you have some kind of 'relationship' with him?
Because if so, it's what he wanted to achieve.

This is no different from the Nigerian emails where some poor man needs money for whatever. Except it's Morocco and you happen to have met him (if it IS him.)

He will be a serial beggar. For every text you have had, other women all over will be getting the same.

I think the onus is on you @Autumnterm to prove it's genuine. We can't prove a negative.

Reminds me of fonejacker’s ‘one off payment of £40 a month’... it seems pretty clear he is building up to asking for money every month

@Autumnterm I voted YABU to send him money, but if you decide to then maybe as a one-off (if it won't leave you broke yourself) and don't do it for him again?